Need Help

[Occult Forum Archive]

Original post: NyxAboveTime

Greetings!

I'm very much new here, and in desperate need for some help with a particularly nasty situation I am in. I am well versed in paganism/witchcraft/any other faith (lol), have been practicing for almost 15 years now. For the first time ever, I am at a loss as to how to handle this effectively for everyone involved.

The situation is this. My fiance's "mother" has now become not only a verbal threat to us, but a physical threat. I am not making any jokes when I say that this woman is a sociopath. I do not take mental illness lightly, nor have I ever thrown about such allegations for no reason. My fiance is an incomplete quadriplegic, five years ago he shattered his C5, and has made remarkable progress in terms of being able to be completely independent again. I have recently taken over full time care of him (it's not much to do, he is very much capable of doing 90% of the stuff that he needs and wants to do). With this, I have moved in with him and his "mother", whom I will simply name K. For the past five years, K has taken care of him, which is an understatement. The history with K goes as this. She has continuously neglected him, left him alone on many occasions out of spite while he has been stuck in his bed, unable to even do an IC (intermittent catheter) as she left the supplies needed just out of reach from him. He has had to sleep in his car on occasions as she has threatened him so badly (bodily) that he did not feel safe to come back home. (He does drive, rolls right into the drivers side, has hand controls, etc. Neat little setup). She has repeatedly called him a piece of shit, a liar, thief, etc. Claimed that he has abused her, has expressed her resentment towards him with me, has backed up on bills so badly it's going to take months to repair, you name it.

My fiance's entire past has been riddled with abuse (K sexually abused him when he was a child, and his father was a "beater"), he has witnessed some very horrendous situations directly and indirectly done to him. He has been supporting this woman now since his father was sent to jail, and she has completely ostracized the rest of the family that is decent because of her inability to do anything right, so to speak. In short, he has been living a hell with her, and the past week has come to a large break in anything resembling safe in any manner.

Right now, we both know that she is trying to get me out of the picture so that he can continue to support her and essentially have him all to herself. I no longer allow her to see him naked (during the mornings getting him ready I have to do a bowel program. Sounds awful, but it's really nothing, heh) When he does an IC, I make sure I am blocking her view of him if she comes into the room. I am disgusted at how she looks at him while he is doing this, and my "mama bear" kicks in. He has had no choice but to deal with her all this time, so he's in a manner, desensitized to it now. Which is understandable. But as long as I am alive, she no longer gets the "privilege" to see him like that. I have found out no less than an hour ago that she was threatening to come after me physically. And I will allow it, as it will be the only way to get her out, by pressing charges and getting a restraining order. Currently we are looking into getting an extension on the Statute of Limitations for incest and pedophilia to attempt to press charges for that.

Ultimately, I do not want any jail, or police involved. But I do want her removed safely and effectively. I Know beyond a doubt that a binding or banishing will no where be effective enough to accomplish this. I have discussed this with my fiance, and he is more than willing to do this with me, so there is no issue of going against his wishes. I just don't know where to go or what to do with this so as not to cause any more harm done to anyone.

So, I am dealing with a person who has wished her son dead (she told him she wished he died on the operating table), has no remorse for what she did to him his whole life, is trying to sabotage our relationship, him and myself. Is dragging his 13 and 6 year old nieces into this making him to be the bad guy (while she is not allowed to be with them alone), has made open threats, and literally only speaks lies. For anyone adept at feeling the situation from this alone, will completely understand that what I say is only the half of what is happening, and the extent of this woman's.....psychosis is absolutely astronomical.

We are currently scrambling to find a place and come up with enough money to allow us to move into an apartment that is fully accessible, I only pray that the Goddess gives us this fortune and blessing. But it's trying to keep the two of us safe while maintaining peace everywhere else is where the problem lies. It's such a complicated and ugly situation, and I feel utterly helpless. I ask for suggestions and guidance throughout this, and the respect to not tell me that I am full of it and refrain from any brutality. I am at my wits end and reaching out, this is delicate and I request that only compassion and wisdom need apply. And I promise, we are trying to find a way without the use of magic to help us, but I feel that right now I need to have some sort of form of anything to to keep the road clear while we get everything organized.

I thank anyone in advance for their aide, so much love and so many Blessings.

Nyx

**I am posting this in a couple of the forums. I apologize if it appears to be spamming. Just trying to cover my angles**

[Occult Forum Archive]

Original post: Qez

NyxAboveTime,

It is difficult (and probably inappropriate) to give advice on personal life situations in such a constricted communication medium, where the full information is unavailable. I would suggest if you wish council to go to a family member or friend or facilitate the services of a professional to bounce your thoughts / feelings off. Sometimes, our minds become so obsessed with our current situation, that a fresh perspective and talking about it can ground us.

Your life situation appears to be currently bringing you a great deal of personal suffering. You are looking to faith for an answer i.e. a spell or a blessing from your Goddess to give you what you think you should need to bring you out of your current stressful life situation.

I can tell you now, that release from your suffering will never come from external things. The reason for this is, that suffering is always internal. Our suffering stems from the fact, we fail to see and accept life for what it is. Have you ever thought that perhaps reality is already an expression of your Goddess' will? Have you ever thought that perhaps your current life situation is already a blessing? What greater blessing is there than the opportunity to grow and learn who we are through life? By asking to change what is, you are assuming you know better than that which is divine. In doing this, do you think you will miss this great opportunity? Life's great blessing is that it is as it is. The greater plan is perfect, everything is perfect exactly the way it is in this very moment.

There are some basic phenomenal truths, that elude us when we are absorbed in the mind. Firstly, anything we think "should" have been or should be, is a lie, it is a rejection of reality (i.e. your God's will). We cannot undo the past and make it in our image. Secondly, we can never ever change anyone's opinions or thoughts, and even if they say we did, we can never know this for sure.

Please remain mindful throughout this ordeal, with your fiance, your mother-in-law and most importantly be compassionate with yourself. If one single person can bring you to a state of complete disgust, anger and hate - this is the cue that there is something wrong with your thinking and you need to investigate!

I'm confident that you will get through this, and hopefully will have learned a great deal more about yourself because of it. There is a phrase I quite like and it is "And this too shall pass". Hold it close in the trying moments because it will pass!

Take care,

[Occult Forum Archive]

Original post: NyxAboveTime

Thank you. You have no idea how calming and reassuring your words have been to me at this very moment.

For speaking to an outside source on this, I do have my family. The only downfall currently is that my parents telephone line was struck by lightning a couple days ago, and left me unable to communicate with them until this morning. Professionals I simply can't afford, but that's OK. As after a nights sleep, I have less anger, but it still lingers strong, unfortunately.

I'm struggling with finding my inner peace right now, as this is a situation I have never been faced with before. I completely did not consider that is something that is being handed over to me as a lesson, as I got too wrapped up in all the drama and the desire to protect what I feel should be protected. Obvious to myself now, my best protection is peace, and even though this isn't always right, I still have to remain guarded.

After talking with my father for a few minutes, I have found that some of the decisions that I am faced with are going to be hard, but I have to go through with them as I KNOW that my choices are for what is right. I have confidence that my choices will not hinder, but save others from something that is fundamentally wrong in my soul. But that is neither here nor there, I'm simply writing down my thoughts and in a manner, rambling.

Thank you again, you opened my eyes, which is something more precious to me than I can ever explain in words.