Not sure what I'm supposed to do or who to ask

[squ4wk]

I've had some events occur in my life that I don't really have answers for, and the people in my life either tell me to pray or see a psychiatrist. Sometimes when im sleeping, I'll have very vivid dreams. They aren't violent or sexual. Just very intense. In nearly all of them, there are shadowy figures, for lack of a better description. They aren't black and grey wisps of smoke or anything. Like I said, I can't describe them in words. Anytime they are there, I always feel this sensation of invitation and welcoming. It's a feeling of belonging. Sometimes, I'll experience it while I'm awake. My instinct says to accept it. But, I was raised in the assemblies of god crazy town church, so I have this weird fear of giving in. It happened the first time when I was 11 and had gotten really sick. I had some kind of infection and I was running a very high fever for almost a week. My parents had the pastor come pray, but I stayed sick. While I was there, I saw them the first time. They didn't speak, just conveyed emotions. Confusion, pain, sorrow, sympathy. Then they noticed me, and welcomed me. My fever broke soon after. I told my parents, but they said it was just fever dreams. I told my pastor, and he warned me about playing with the devil. I grew up fearful of it. I learned I could block it with junk food. Eating seems to dull it. As I got older, I realized I didn't believe in anything. The praying in tongues and falling out just seemed theatrical. Yet I still fear those figures despite the warmth they show. Lately, I've been eating healthy and taking care of myself, and it's returned in force.

Sorry about the novel. I'm just not sure where to look for answers. I don't have any faith or religion to turn to, and I like to think I'm not going crazy.

[Aelo]

May I suggest giving a shot to confronting elements in your subconscious that you might be avoiding?
Not to discount your actual predicament, but the first step (choice, perhaps) in evolving oneself onward is facing fears and repressed issues (noted in your growing up fearful: of the devil (unknown/uncertainty), and of the pressures imposed on you from those authorities whom you sought advice: pastor/parents...etc.)
Doing real work on yourself doesn't begin with confronting yourself, it begins with loving yourself and others. What you see in your dreams, vivid or not, is the language of the deeply seated affairs your subconscious mind indulges so as to communicate them to your awareness. roughly speaking there is a language to that, a programming, if you will. Ultimately, only you can dis-cipher what it means for you, and what you will do with it. anyone can interpret a dream, as they perceive the elements in it, to mean something or other. But the choice is yours, where and if shadow figures lurk within...or do they exist at all. I like to think of them as holes in perspective, things indeed unknown, but not without worth, and they poke and guide to aspects of myself that I do confront and assimilate.
May I suggest doing yoga each day for around 20 min. The key to yoga is not the posture (asana) or the balance or being physically fit to stand still and breathe...although all that comes with time. The key is meditating while in each posture on individual aspects of a goal that you are trying to understand/achieve. a perspective that you are working with or working to gain...can be elucidated when practicing yoga. Not to mention, a healthy body is the best vehicle with which to practice a healthy spiritual evolution

[Desecrated]

Well first of all. It's nothing supernatural or weird like that.

It's called Sleep paralysis, and the figures that you describe are known as shadow people.

(over-simplified explanation)
Basically what happens is that you are having trouble breathing in your sleep and your brain tries to communicate this to you to wake you up, but we often see it as entities coming from the outside and not realizing that it is an internal problem.

You say that fast food helps with the situation. This is sometimes known as food coma
When you eat heavy and fat food your body uses up more energy trying to digest it that it simply doesn't have time for weird dreams and other explorations.

A much healthier solution is some sort of sleeping aid. There are both alternative medicine, traditional herbs and medicine that you can test.

It will also help to change your sleeping habits and sleeping position, for those that sleep on their back it seems to happen more often, Also people who snore can experience this. There is a tiny little plastic clip you can get from most drug stores that is placed on your nose and helps to keep the airways open.

Sleeping in a t-shirt and simply placing a pillow on your back might help you from rolling over and keeps you sleeping on your side.

But I do recommend breathing exercises. These can be done by themselves or in combination with meditation, yoga or qigong.

A little bit of exercise two hours after dinner helps to get rid of excess energy before sleeping and is generally recommended.

I would however recommend you to go to a doctor and test for asthma, allergies, and other problems that can mess with your breathing.

[solace_of_shadows]

Because I am new and seeking of truths myself, I don't have much by way of advice unfortunately other than a shared experience. I agree with the other statements too. I know dreams can have a very powerful symbolic significance, but I don't know enough about your or the other things to rightly say what it is...I've heard/read about these "shadow people" as well as experiencing them myself. (Also of note I've had lifelong insomnia, something I've felt has played a role in these interests and experiences). However never in dreams, usually I just see them in any given waking time around me, in various areas of proximity, usually fading as soon as I try to look directly at them. I experience them more when things are different for me spiritually. I've read similar scientific articles regarding the sleep paralysis and hypnagogic states, and something else a while back where there were stimulating parts of the brain with electrical activity, and were able to cause the sensation of a "shadow person". To reference a Scientific American article of that vein (may be the same one, it's been a while, but the principle is very similar, of a neurosurgeon who had a near-death experience): "...Second, we now know of a number of factors that produce such fantastical hallucinations, which are masterfully explained by the great neurologist Oliver Sacks in his 2012 book Hallucinations (Knopf). For example, Swiss neuroscientist Olaf Blanke and his colleagues produced a “shadow person” in a patient by electrically stimulating her left temporoparietal junction. “When the woman was lying down,” Sacks reports, “a mild stimulation of this area gave her the impression that someone was behind her; a stronger stimulation allowed her to define the ‘someone’ as young but of indeterminate sex.”

Though the jury is still out for me, personally. In combination with all the other things I've experienced, I just don't know. I feel I need more knowledge, especially spiritually. The question is, silly and simple as this may seem, something is causing these reactions. They had to use electrodes or whatever else for their experiments. We obviously don't live in a lab...so what is causing this sort of thing with us?

[Desecrated]

so what is causing this sort of thing with us?

Chemical unbalance from drugs, lack of nutrients, prolonged periods without sleep or outside influences like mold. electromagnetic fields from bad wiring and such.

But also lack of oxygen.

[solace_of_shadows]

Chemical unbalance from drugs, lack of nutrients, prolonged periods without sleep or outside influences like mold. electromagnetic fields from bad wiring and such.

But also lack of oxygen.

With respect, these things, the other scenarios - They make sense, certainly, and they exist to everyone, everywhere, yet I doubt that is the sole reason for these occurrences. There could be many factors, excluding paranormal.

[squ4wk]

That is a more acceptable answer than some of my other inquiries. It makes more sense to have sleep apnea or something similar. It's also been suggested that since it started when I was sick, that I may have inadvertantly undergone a type of shamanistic vision quest, and now I'm supposed to allow the spirits to guide me instead of running away. I only recently even considered the possibility of there actually being magic forces in the world, so I find it hard to believe I'm like an accidental practitioner.

[corvidus]

If was a shamanic fever-vision, at least make it known to these 'entities' that you seek development towards your highest purpose, and in line with your spiritual development as intended by your Creator (whoever that might be), and anything other then that is not welcomed.

[RoseRed]

so I find it hard to believe I'm like an accidental practitioner.

There's no such animal.

Ease your mind. It's real. There are quite a few of us here that live a magical life. We are what we are and we do what we do. Some people find ways of tuning it out or turning it off. Those are skills that can be learned. People recommend meditation because you need to ease and still your mind. Until you can control your thoughts you can't control much.

Find a quiet place in nature somewhere and sit and ponder and wonder what you might find out tomorrow. Some people merely learn to manage their natural and inherent Gifts and Abilities. Some people find a religious experience in it. Our Paths are our own but we walk also walk with others. Let loose with your feelings, Luke. Feel the tree you're sitting next to. The earth beneath you, supporting you. The air as it passes through your lungs and sustains you, the fire and water pumping through your veins (or have a water bottle with you). Simply feel and breathe. Let the sun shine on your face.

The word Occult simply means 'hidden'. That's it. Many religions declare it evil. I think you said it was southern baptist? (I'm too lazy to go back and look, atm). Anyways, that's a conversation in and of itself. If the good and evil thing needs to be brought into the discussion - I think what one does with their Gifts can be classified by many different measuring sticks as good or evil or gray or white or black.

There is a member here that is a self proclaimed Satantist. He's like the least evil person ever and I happen to have a deep respect for. There's a whole big world out there that you're just finding out about. This isn't a phase for me - it's my life. It's who I am. My family participates in my Rituals. (that's new but very cool, btw). Don't let the small minds of others dictate your beliefs.

[minervajane]

Something is trying to get your attention and it sounds like it won't stop until you face it. It doesn't seem to be anything dark at all, and if I had to guess I'd say it's just a part of yourself that needs to be acknowledged, but it also sounds like it could be some sort of guardian. If I were you I would make an effort to find out what they are by meditation and starting a dream journal. If you give them more attention the message will come in stronger and you can figure it out. Meditation will help you be more receptive and will also make your dreams more clear and meaningful. Don't be afraid of it. Whatever it is, it seems to belong to you. Invite them to speak up.

[MrChiLambda]

Unfortunately I am only learning wicca, however, I can tell you that anti-psychotics are basically bombs on the brain, and they will knock you right out for the count.

So, if you are in situations where you are able to persevere and allow your bodies own natural healing methods and nutritional strategies and spiritual alignments to heal you, then reach for the minor tranquilizers on trying days, and if you can avoid the anti-psychotic (hard/heavy tranquilizer) regime, do that.

Some claim the minor tranquilizers are addictive. That is no issue with me and on trying days, sometimes one neglects to resort to that fallback safety.

Anyways, the anti-psychotics are considered the major tranquilizers, and you'll find the occasional lawyers commercial claiming they can win you some money if you experienced some of the nasty side effects. The xanax, the lorazepams, are minor tranquilizers.

In all cases, you can consider them neuroleptics more or less. The brain is constantly regenerating itself with newer neurons, so, in some cases, that natural defense system is asked to work overtime, over extended periods of time, after you wipe or "reset" your brain with heavy rounds of anti-psychotics. I am no doctor or bio-chemist. Hope that helps.

Oh, some essential oils may be considered light tranquilizers, and we probably all know that, but forget easily.

I've had some events occur in my life that I don't really have answers for, and the people in my life either tell me to pray or see a psychiatrist.

We all get the occasional strange or weird or whatever happening in our lives. There are psychiatrists, and they are going to drop the meds on you, so never ever ever express that you are a harm to yourself or others, unless it concerns you that you are beyond your limits. Otherwise, their risk assessment may be outside of your personal sense of risk. If you are worried, say something. If you are in control, stay away from the confessional and maybe prayer or spirituality or meditation is the better route.

Anyways, excellent food for thought. Many "mentally ill" people are shot by the police, so, if you are out of control, say something early. That is a phone call worth listening to.

http://www.thestar.com/news/crime/2013/ ... _evil.html

Me personally, if I need to ground myself, I do that with physiology and science.

For example, if I couldn't handle shadowy presence in my dreams. My thoughts routed in science would be to investigate my kidney function, my somatic function, whatever. Fear is normally an amygdala response.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amygdala#Fear

Fear
There are cases of human patients with focal bilateral amygdala lesions, due to the rare genetic condition Urbach-Wiethe disease.[61][62] Such patients fail to exhibit fear-related behaviors, leading one, Patient S.M., to be dubbed the "woman with no fear". This finding reinforces the conclusion that the amygdala "plays a pivotal role in triggering a state of fear".[63]

So, I tend to lack fear in many situations, it's the stress that gets me, so, I pin that down on my kidneys or something. I really need to figure my anxiety a little more. As for your fear. Hmmmnnn...

I really suggest you tread with extreme caution with any herbals, and the info out there is sparse, and my knowledge lacking, however maybe this search result helps.

http://www.livestrong.com/article/54813 ... ala-herbs/