One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way)

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DarkSchneider
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One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way)

Post by DarkSchneider »

So, a little back story is in order.

Back in 2013-2014, there was this FB group I joined. This man offered me to discuss with me in private, occult ethics and stuff.

I read from the Fallen Angel Oracle Deck, suggesting he would be my future teacher.

A while passed. He didn't message me back. Then a while later he adds me, we have a misunderstanding and I insulted him, blocking him.

Recently I did a dice divination session. about my future with the occult. It was suggesting I find someone to apologize to, because it will be important for me.

So I finally unblock this guy, wrote an apology and explained my situation. Turns out he's a really nice guy...

and now he wants me to be his student... Fucking scary...

Is this a good opportunity? I didn't even mention any of this to him. He just suggested to teach me in the ways of Tarot.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Caerdon
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by Caerdon »

Well, there's nothing wrong with trying it out with this guy... after all if you don't feel it fits or works for you there's nothing that says you can't stop being his student down the road
Time is but an illusion in perception and is only perceived to pass by at the same moments together for us all... which is, quite frankly, me saying to not expect from me in a timely manner!
-I am but a simple wanderer... Though I may be gone for immeasurable time, always do I return.

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Neko-phyte
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by Neko-phyte »

Wow, gives me shivers up the spine. Go for it! It really sounds like this man's going to be an important part of your journey, and if you have an offer now, why not take it?

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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

We did online Tarot training via facebook messages. Needless to say, it's been intense. I feel more on top of my game. This certainly has been an interesting while...

I feel fortunate, despite all the crap I had to deal with recently. It feels like I'm back on track.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Neko-phyte
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by Neko-phyte »

DarkSchneider wrote:We did online Tarot training via facebook messages. Needless to say, it's been intense. I feel more on top of my game. This certainly has been an interesting while...

I feel fortunate, despite all the crap I had to deal with recently. It feels like I'm back on track.
That's fantastic! I'm so happy to hear it. Keep up the good work :)

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Maya The Generator
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by Maya The Generator »

Good [thumbup]

Most of my knowledge comes from bad situations... I do not know, some people just must learn on their own skin.

Bruce said something in that topic:

Image

Hope everything will go smooth :)
Illusion is the first of the pleasures.
The bomb of entropic chaos.
If some assholes levels a twelve gauge your way, you drain him, skin him and bash in his skull. Self-preservation is vital part of humanity after all. My favorite part, in fact
My mind is telling me NOOO but my BODY, MY BODY is telling me YEAS

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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

This guy seems to know what he's talking about. We discussed the Tarot and all the famous occultists, but is there any reason to be cautious? Am I paranoid for thinking this could be too good to be true and such?

He already started talking to me on the phone and via facebook. He invited me to a public event, but also suggested I see his temple at home one day. I dunno this feels like it's moving a little fast...
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Maya The Generator
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by Maya The Generator »

Take your time and see for yourself. You do not need to agree on anything.

And from experience: You can spent 10 years with somebody and think it is your bestfriend - BANG! - It was a lie. But is it enough to stop beliving in anybody? Surely not!
Illusion is the first of the pleasures.
The bomb of entropic chaos.
If some assholes levels a twelve gauge your way, you drain him, skin him and bash in his skull. Self-preservation is vital part of humanity after all. My favorite part, in fact
My mind is telling me NOOO but my BODY, MY BODY is telling me YEAS

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RoseRed
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by RoseRed »

That is fast. Very fast.

Public events are good. Bring a friend with you. Please don't go running to a stranger's house because he was nice nice for a little bit on Facebook.
When my wings get tired I grab my broom.

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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

I believe you RoseRed.

I'll... slow it down. I guess this should be an exercise in knowing how to say no or to set boundaries.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Stukov
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by Stukov »

Maya The Generator wrote:Most of my knowledge comes from bad situations...
Whatever is used, is never wasted.
I am the Watcher.
I am the Wanderer.
I am the Whisper.
I am the Warden.
I am the Weaver.

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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

@RoseRed

Another thing that crossed my mind is that this guy gives lessons at a school of magick. I don't know if that suggests he's definitely trustworthy but once I get a feel for him in public and take my time getting to know him, I'll see how he is.

Like I said, if anything is too good to be true, it probably is.
Last edited by DarkSchneider on Thu Oct 15, 2015 4:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by Sypheara »

Don't throw your caution out the wind too quickly, I would say.

Its more than likely he is being sincere - there is far too much paranoia these days. hes probably just glad hes found someone to talk these things through with and who he can work with in the physical.

That said consider your safety first, you did meet him online.
Last edited by Sypheara on Thu Oct 15, 2015 5:34 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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RoseRed
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by RoseRed »

I think taking your time is a great idea. Good things do happen but it is only responsible to be cautious.
When my wings get tired I grab my broom.

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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

I've decided I won't go too far ahead with this guy. It's just making me a little too nervous. All the invitations and such.

I asked my dad and some other close friends for advice as well and they're all unsure as well, but more toward the side of caution.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

Update:

So I decided tonight I will officially not pursue this guy. Despite the Oracle card session being right in what role he would play, I don't think it's best to trust a stranger like this. Waaaaaaay too convenient.

With that in mind I'd like to ask all of you something.

If not for this guy, when do we make a good opportunity of being taught? I know a few of you seem to think it's better to be taught, than it is to work solo. But the point is my safety should come first and I don't want to compromise that.

Is it worth it to take a course? Maybe find mutual friends and start a club of the occult?
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by RoseRed »

What's happened in the last week that helped you come to this decision?
When my wings get tired I grab my broom.

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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

Nothing really.

He hasn't replied since he said he was going to be moving somewhere in town. I talked to my dad and other people for advice. They all told me to be careful in situations like this.

I sent him a message already turning down his offer.

I'm just really nervous and I figured if I can learn on my own, it would be safer in the long run anyways.

Also he seemed to correct everything I learned about the Tarot by using the Wiccan elements, instead of the traditional elemental associations for wands and swords (wands representing fire and swords for air in classic Tarot tradition, he said it was the opposite to fit Wicca). I wasn't sure about that. I figured if I got this far with the Tarot I can do it myself.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by ErebusNamtar »

And there's your lesson in all of this. To have more faith in your own abilities. Pretty positive if you ask me and indeed as important as you had divined earlier.
Follow your intuition.

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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by RoseRed »

Awesome post, EM.

Check out the Biddy Tarot website. I think you can learn a lot there.

I really think you need to stay away from Wicca. It doesn't seem to mesh too well with you. That's not to say to avoid everything wiccan-esque, just that the religious aspects don't jive well with you.
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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

@ ErebusNamtar

Thank you for that. :) It's of great encouragement.

@ RoseRed

That's really something else that was stressing me lately.

I'm trying to get down the basic rituals, foundations and I started reading more books about Wicca. Problem is, I've started so many I'm not sure where to go from here and now I'm really distracted at the moment. I can list the books I've been reading.

I think I'm just not being creative enough. I'm wondering about ethics and morality with magick, if that's even necessary. I've read the Satanic Bible a few times and it's probably the book that's influenced me the most in terms of vision, but every now and then I get confused and wonder if it's view is something I can handle. So, when it comes to Wicca with it's rede and three fold law, I get deterred from following through.

As we've discussed RoseRed, I'm a seeker. That's my path, to seek and to educate and better myself. I don't need any Gods, and I don't need any religious influence, despite my insecurities of those subjects. It's not necessary for me to pursue Gods or Religions.

As far as practical work, I've been falling behind. This whole mess about finding a teacher, wicca and such has greatly hindered me. I need to observe right now, diligently. I figure I will get to the actual spellwork when I'm ready and have more energy. Not to mention... I've got a sort of hoarding problem as I've mentioned before. I have so many books they're piling onto my bed. That's something I definitely need to change.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by RoseRed »

Nope, you just need to breathe and relax. This is all part of the Seekers path. You found something, you learned about it, you take from it what works for you and then you continue on your journey. If you hadn't looked into Wicca - you wouldn't have realized you were great at kitchen witchery and natural magics.

You may not need any of the gods in your life right now but I fully believe they watch over you. [smile2]

Ethics and morality are extremely important topics in magic. You still want to be able to look at yourself in the mirror, be able to sleep at night and know in your heart that you've been True to yourself and your beliefs. In order to do that you need to figure out what those are exactly. There's busy time and downtime, uptime and slow time, learning time and processing time, research time and thinking time. There's a season for it all and like the wheel of the year - it continues on round and round.

Since you've left the big bad wizard ego driven silliness behind you've made soooooo much progress. I'm very proud of you. I'm sure many of the members here are.

I would love to know what books you've been reading. If any of us are familiar with them it'll be easier to discuss what you have questions or thoughts about.
When my wings get tired I grab my broom.

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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

I understand. I'll pace myself and be a good magician lol :) Maybe that Kitchen Witchery book should be the next one I should read. It's right there on my bookshelf across from me as I write this.

That's very encouraging to know they are still there for me :D

Good point. I've always questions my view on ethics and morality. I think there's still time to better myself or change my ways if anything.

LMAO I laughed a that :) Thank you though, for your honesty and your compliments :D

I'll list what I can off the top of my head:

The Modern Guide To Witchcraft: Your Complete Guide to Witches, Covens, and Spells
Wicca for Everyday Living
The Craft: A Witch's Book of Shadows
Earth Power: Techniques of Natural Magic
Earth, Air, Fire & Water
Wicca for Beginners
The Key of Solomon
The Complete Illustrated Guide to Numerology
The Only Wiccan Spell Book You'll Ever Need
Secrets of Divination

You may have noticed a good amount of wiccan books in there. As I've mentioned before, I was just trying to get some basics like circle casting and calling quarters down. Elemental stuff strictly. I was also reading the Key of Solomon but I don't like it as much as I've used to. The fact that animal sacrifices are involved really disinterests me. (Or they may be code names for herbs and plants I'm not sure) but given that it's Judaic magick, I wouldn't be surprised if they were actual animal sacrifices.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by Sypheara »

Goetia has its roots in necromantic practices so does involve elements of animal sacrifice. Thats its not for you is not necessarily an issue. The gods smile on thosr who walk the bloodless path and work other kinds of magick just as much that get their hands red and heavy.

Rose is right, you might not feel at the moment ready or the need for the gods but I definetly can feel as rose said they are watching over you.

Ill echo what she has said in that this balancing of the ego has been really good for you.

As an off note I think youd really like paul husons book mastering herbalism. My copies falling apart right now ive read it quite alot. Hes an approachable writwr in his prose.. A bit dated but quite informative.
'Flores noctis sumus atque alas pandimus, In profundis tenebrarum.'
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DarkSchneider
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Re: One of the Scariest things happened to me (in a good way

Post by DarkSchneider »

I was fascinated by anything related to Goetic magick, but I just can't bring myself to harm innocence like an animal. If there were really alternatives to the magick, then I would consider it. Part of why the appeal is lacking to me is, as well, the fact that all that fasting, meditation and such, doesn't suit my style. I'd rather invest my time in more reasonable ways. Something more subtle. Classical Grimoire magick is just not meant for me right now.

It is appreciated to know the Gods have not abandoned me ever :)

Thank you. I recall you've been in my threads before to notice my progress.

I'll make note of the author. Thanks for the suggestion.
"...You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world." -Anton LaVey

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