17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point

[RoseRed]

C, are you thinking 'sins of the father'?

Hmm, actually I hadn't considered that one when replying. However, it does lead to other possibilities that I hadn't considered before concerning the usage of bloodlines, but honestly what I have thought of in regards to that is, well, a bit hard to swallow in practicality (in relative terms to what has been in this thread, that is).

But no, what I originally was thinking is that he's basically a catalyst, like a cursed or hexed item or object would be, where if you come into contact with, or into proximity, then it enacts and spreads to you.

How could you not? The father is a scattergun with shells of chaos and destruction. He ruins everything around him that he's ever cared about. The more he cares about something the worse the destruction and random chaos ensues. From the sounds of it - the only thing he's more obsessive about than her is his son.

It very well could be. The whole sins of the father thing can manifest in so many different ways. The concept has crossed over damn near every culture I've researched. In this case - the chaos and destruction is hyper focused in the son. That's a lot of crisis to happen to one so young. You don't see it often. Thank all the gods for that. Sure, a lot of things fall apart, life gets hard and bad but this is fucking ridiculous. It takes a strong woman to stay upright and graceful under these circumstances.

While you're at it - check out Susun Weed. Especially, her information on infusions. She has extensive info on how to nourish and replenish your physical body as well. You can't leave that out. Without nurturing the physical vessel - any energy work you have done will be mostly wasted.

Spiral, I was thinking of the connection of her son while I was reading your post. Wouldn't it be lovely if things were so simple? Her son may be grown and of legal age but he still needs his mommy. And that's how some men hold onto their 'property'. They breed. (It's an ugly Truth. I don't know how to word that to make is sound less horrible than it really is. I suck at sugar coating.)

hellbore, this has none of the markers of old/ancient ancestral curses. You can lay that thought to rest.

I'm wondering if your comment to Caerdon is referring to some kind of ancestral thing "the sins of the father"

You don't ever need to do that with me, There's no reason to get lost down in those rabbit holes. Simply ask for clarification.
And details are important.

As I emerged from sleep that morning I saw my mother's face. She passed in 2011 and I'd never previously felt her presence.

You've been a practicing witch for years and years. Once you begin to understand your different gifts and how to use them - you'll be fine.

You kept going down the ancestral thing and one of them showed up. That's to be expected in certain circles. She showed you how upset she was, got her ass to work doing what she HATED and got it done. That's the bloodline you come from. Don't ever forget that. Do you have any plans on erecting an ancestral shrine? It could be as simple as a candle and a picture.

Just don't forget that your son is comprised of two blood lines. We've heard an awful lot about your side. What do you know of the ancestry prior to the dad? That could be helpful.

It really does feel strangely tactical.

There's nothing really tactical about hitting health, sleep and money. That's just common knowledge.

I agree that powessy's theory doesn't really fit with what you're describing. Keep in mind that he's only been at this a couple years and he's still trying to figure out what it is that he's seeing. He sees in such extreme detail that it's easy to forget that we're all simply cogs in the wheel.

[the_spiral]

Dear the_spiral and Caerdon

Re: Reiki Master

I'm so depleted I need to get this right. Would you mind suggesting some preliminary questions to ask these practitioners to determine who might be a good fit? I'd then follow up the best with a phone call.

Sure, I can think of a few:

1) Ask about their lineage. A reputable Western practitioner should be able to provide an unbroken teacher lineage to Masters Usui, Hayashi or Takata. You may find exceptions, and Japanese practitioners have different lineages, but you can avoid a lot of the trendy flim-flam by seeking someone with a traditional background.
2) Ask if they can perform Byosen scanning and aura cleansing (sometimes called "psychic surgery", but not the Western practice of the same name). Some practitioners don't use Byosen scanning and prefer to work intuitively, through accessing Akashic records etc., but they should have some method for scanning your energy body, identifying and healing specific areas of energetic dysfunction. They shouldn't just rely on what you tell them you think is wrong.
3) Ask if they can meet for a consultation before your first session. This will give you the chance to establish trust before working with them. Does this person seem honest, caring and trustworthy? Do your vibes mesh well? Are they committed to helping you find a solution? Are they pushing for money right away, or trying to sell you on some fluffy life coaching scheme?

I'm sure Caerdon has some good ideas too. [smile]

@ Rose -

Yes, she'll always have a connection to this loser through her children. This is (sadly, as you said) how abusers keep their victims around. I was just wondering if a private ceremony to permanently renounce his power over HER might help. This wouldn't impact his role as "father" but as "husband/ex/abuser." She can't stop her children from seeking a relationship with their dad—and it wouldn't be fair to try—but it seems much of his destructive obsession is focused on her, and removing herself (psychically and energetically speaking) from his crosshairs as much as possible might be a healthier form of counter-magic than working directly against him, which might end up feeding the connection he's trying to maintain with all his weird little poppets and parties. Attachments are a two-way street, and sometimes all you can do is barricade your end of the street and leave the other end to their own fate. But I totally understand if it's something she's not ready or able to do.

And also - I COMPLETELY agree if she's getting visits from her mother, it might be high time for some ancestor work. My mother and maternal grandmother were both spiritual badasses and very little gets through their wall of protection now. Enlisting the guides around her for help is a great idea.

[hellebore]

Dear RoseRed and the_spiral

Thank you for all the help you are giving in trying to work out what is going on and how best to deal with it.

Spiral, those pointers re: reiki are great. I'll see if Caerdon has anything to add and then send off some emails.

You've been a practicing witch for years and years. Once you begin to understand your different gifts and how to use them - you'll be fine.

You kept going down the ancestral thing and one of them showed up. That's to be expected in certain circles. She showed you how upset she was, got her ass to work doing what she HATED and got it done. That's the bloodline you come from. Don't ever forget that. Do you have any plans on erecting an ancestral shrine? It could be as simple as a candle and a picture.

And also - I COMPLETELY agree if she's getting visits from her mother, it might be high time for some ancestor work. My mother and maternal grandmother were both spiritual badasses and very little gets through their wall of protection now. Enlisting the guides around her for help is a great idea.

I was really close to tears reading those responses. Rose, I knew about being a witch from childhood but tried to repress it for decades because of a frightening experience. As an adult I discovered that much the same thing had happened to my mum and later we discovered an almost forgotten family belief that psychic gifts were passed down to the oldest daughter of the oldest daughter. Getting it into perspective though, our natural talents have been of a very modest kind compared with many I read about here! There is a lot of hard work and practice ahead for me. [happyface]

I used to have a little ancestral shrine in our old home (we moved last year) and you have spurred me on to make one here. We live in a 400 year old cottage which has a very nurturing, although sometimes challenging, 'personality'. Before moving here I only had one visit from an ancestor, this summer I have had three; the other two being from the great uncle who committed suicide (a sad but loving and sweet presence) and my closest friend (a comforting, uplifting and gently arse-kicking visit).

RoseRed, I know of Susun Weed and have a friend in Puerto Rico who is studying her work, so I will definitely get onto this. I do take your point about the need for nourishing and supporting the physical body.

hellbore, this has none of the markers of old/ancient ancestral curses. You can lay that thought to rest.

That's a relief and good to be able to cross another line of enquiry off the list.

What do you know of the ancestry prior to the dad? That could be helpful.

I don't know many generations back but what I know about recent ones isn't pretty. Let's call my ex 'X'. X's parents had 5 children, two girls and three boys, the other two boys arriving before X and dying at or near birth. X's father had been a paratrooper and was a cruel, controlling man who died earlier this year. X suffered from severe asthma as a child and was punished for his 'weakness' by his father (whom he nevertheless adored - pattern, much?), for example by being forced to walk miles to the doctors whilst barely able to breathe. Aged 8 (the age our son became ill) the now-common asthma drug ventolin became available and X was suddenly transformed from weakling to healthy child. X's father was an alcoholic who sexually abused X's older sister, involving X in ways he could not bring himself to talk about. X's mother was a complete doormat and adored X's father, refusing to intervene even when X's sister began self-harming. Yet all three siblings describe their childhood as 'idyllic' and X none ever sought counselling or therapy. The degree of repressed rage must have been phenomenal, and I'm sure still is.

X's mother seemed to have had a happy childhood but his abusive father learned his ways from his own father who subjected him to violent physical abuse, which X's father always claimed 'made him a man'. Alcoholism runs through all the men in the family and our son has only been protected from that so far because alcohol reacts badly with his medication.

When X introduced me to the family they were *very* uncomfortable about the fact I had a psychology degree (I've never practised clinically). The exception was his older sister who reached out to me, but was soon put back in her place by the family.

One of the oddest (to me; all families are odd in their way) things was their clan mentality - they are not Scottish. X's father (who had many siblings and even more cousins) was referred to by the wider family as their 'head' and took the role very seriously. This is not common in England. X was his successor and our son was heir to the throne. So immense pressure and prestige attached to being the oldest son of the oldest son. When he became ill not only X became enraged but his father's anger and disgust was also pretty clear; our son was written off and focus was switched to the oldest male cousin.

To give you an example of the real life abuse towards us (this is hard for me to write about but it is very illustrative), in 2012 when my son had the psychotic episode and was hospitalised, the hospital called his father as next-of-kin because our son had attacked me when I tried to prevent him leaving the house. That evening his father and stepmother drove 150 miles to the hospital and signed a document saying that they were the only people who could receive information about my son's condition etc. We'll ignore the legalities - the hospital should not have done that but it took months to unravel. Our greatest fear was that the episode had been brought on by another tumour, but we were unable to speak to his doctors or do anything. After a week of this agony my daughter rang her father (she had had no contact with him for 7 years) to plead that he tell us what was happening and rescind the form. He mocked her and put the phone down. She called him back in floods of tears. He put the phone down again. She tried a third time - same thing. The next day we received a call from the police saying my ex and his wife wished to have my daughter arrested for harassment. She was 16. I got this nonsense stopped but it was deeply, deeply shocking.

Roll forward six months. We knew my son had been discharged *without diagnosis and without a brain scan* into the care of his father. With friends' help we finally tracked him down and found him living alone in a flat, half-starved, confused and terrified. His father had collected him from the hospital on the promise of a home with him, but revealed on the way back that he was actually dumping him in a hostel. His wife abused her work position to get my son priority housing, which is where we found him. He weighed less than 6 stone and had not seen a doctor for 4 months. His father had been controlling his state benefits and his movements. He was allowed out only to the corner shop and to visit his father's home once a week for 2 hours. He was never once allowed to stay over (It's 5 bedroom). He was given promises of 'more integration' with the family provided he demonstrated loyalty by refusing to have any contact with myself and his sister. Another condition (imposed by his grandfather) was that he learn to hold his beer.

Forgetting the negligent role of the authorities in all of this, there was absolutely no legal action we could take against X. Our son was over 21 and deemed competent. When we got him home our GP told me we had found him in the nick of time. He was equally terrified of his father's retribution and terrified he had lost the opportunity to win his father over forever. Friends threatened to go to the press and at that point X began hacking into our computers having previously obtained passwords from our son (he works in a role that makes it easy). The police were frustrated that their hands were tied and 'have his card marked' on several counts. Meanwhile, I gathered enough evidence to scare X with threats of public exposure and job loss to eventually put paid to his campaign. None of us has had contact with him since.

Therapy has helped my son and he is now back living in the flat, we have moved back to our home town to be close to him (I think this itself will have freaked X) and he has a nice girlfriend but has recently become so stricken with arthritis that he has lost his job.

I need to stop because I'm overloading you with details, it's about the RL harassment rather than the psychic stuff and I'm beginning to feel shaky going through it all, but if it serves the purpose of finding a way of stopping the attacks then I'm happy to share whatever details help. I also have to say that when the children were young X was a controlling but loving parent and a very involved father.

[Caerdon]

Dear the_spiral and Caerdon

Re: Reiki Master

I'm so depleted I need to get this right. Would you mind suggesting some preliminary questions to ask these practitioners to determine who might be a good fit? I'd then follow up the best with a phone call.

Sure, I can think of a few:

1) Ask about their lineage. A reputable Western practitioner should be able to provide an unbroken teacher lineage to Masters Usui, Hayashi or Takata. You may find exceptions, and Japanese practitioners have different lineages, but you can avoid a lot of the trendy flim-flam by seeking someone with a traditional background.
2) Ask if they can perform Byosen scanning and aura cleansing (sometimes called "psychic surgery", but not the Western practice of the same name). Some practitioners don't use Byosen scanning and prefer to work intuitively, through accessing Akashic records etc., but they should have some method for scanning your energy body, identifying and healing specific areas of energetic dysfunction. They shouldn't just rely on what you tell them you think is wrong.
3) Ask if they can meet for a consultation before your first session. This will give you the chance to establish trust before working with them. Does this person seem honest, caring and trustworthy? Do your vibes mesh well? Are they committed to helping you find a solution? Are they pushing for money right away, or trying to sell you on some fluffy life coaching scheme?

I'm sure Caerdon has some good ideas too. [smile]

Haha, ah I'll see what I can come up with, though you've hit alot more important points than I would have thought of!

Alright, so, first you should ask about their process, have them explain it to you on what they do, how they work with the energy system, stuff like that. This will help identify if the person is actually a professional at doing this, or if they are full of flim-flam. You should ask for examples on what they've done for people, what extreme cases they've helped with, and see if there is anyone who they have done work on that you can talk to (basically get a customer review on them), as well as see how many repeat customers they have and for how long they've been going to them. Chances are, if they've had alot of people coming back for years to them, then they are legit.

Ask them to explain the energy body to you,including, but not limited to, chakra points, the Aura, etheric (or energy) centers (these being the centers of the Mind, Emotion, and Power) as well as the etheric body itself.

I don't know the proper term for this, but ask if they can perform a chakra flush.

Last but not least (atleast until I think of more) ask them, in their professional opinion, what their recommendations are that you can do to help yourself.


@RedRose:
I probably didn't connect to it as, in the cases I've come across for it, the focus is on the son, either having it all centered against him, or "inheriting" it and being the new emission for such things. As you say though, it manifests in different ways, however the main thing seems to be focused on her and her ex, and the muddled relationships therein. The children, atleast on how i've gotten a read on the situation, isn't the main focus of the malfeasance, but she is via contact with her ex.

*Edit*

Damn, I am so sorry to hear the details of your ex's abuse in such detail, from towards him and later what he's done, and while he has not have had an easy life, it still does not exonerate his behavior in the now, especially in regards to your children. I can't believe how well you've held up in all these years going through that amount of crap from him, let alone holding your daughter and son's life together like you have done as they sound well adjusted compared to how this type of situations they've gone through can affect someone growing up.

I think I may have to revisit the drawing board on the Sins of the Father that RedRose mentioned... this is alot of new information that wasn't there before that gives a new perspective on this. However, I won't ask for any more details on these issues (as I know that it's very upsetting stuff to relive, even just writing it down) unless it ends up being important that the information is needed.

[hellebore]

Just sending you a quick reply Caerdon as I'm caught up with a work deadline tonight.

Thank you very much for the Reiki info - together with spiral's suggestions it puts me in a much better place to find the right practitioner.

Thank you also for your kindness and sensitive words. I hadn't gone into too much RL stuff before as I didn't want to muddy the waters re: the psychic attacks or overload you all with info. Please do ask anything that might help you get a better feel for what's going on - I'll be fine - I just got a bit overwhelmed writing a long narrative.

Work has meant I haven't had time to look up the sins of the fathers. I only know that as a biblical reference and I'm not a Christian so am a bit fuzzy on the detail.

[RoseRed]

The biblical concept revolves around 7generations being punished for the sins of one man. The father of that clan, so to speak. It can also present as a curse that follows the bloodlines of the males, in this case. There are some people that make bargains so that their children can pay for their crimes. In this instance when the father 'sins' it appears to be his best possessions that are damaged.

Clan structures are found in many cultures. But it does fill in a lot of blanks. I wouldn't be comfortable sharing much more than you have either.

Oh, and you don't actually need a reiki master. You can heal the energy body yourself. Its just a little easier to have a pro do it.

[hellebore]

Good Morning RoseRed

The biblical concept revolves around 7generations being punished for the sins of one man. The father of that clan, so to speak. It can also present as a curse that follows the bloodlines of the males, in this case. There are some people that make bargains so that their children can pay for their crimes. In this instance when the father 'sins' it appears to be his best possessions that are damaged.

I've spent a couple of hours trying to do some research but am getting nowhere fast. Some articles argue that the biblical concept really refers to learned behaviours; a few argue that a demon hops from one generation to another, but in both cases the problems seem to be strictly linear, with no mention of collateral damage to other family members. And I've drawn a blank on people making bargains There doesn't seem to be anything on old threads here, but I'm conscious of your comment that such curses are rare. Can you point me to something I can read about such curses and how they can be broken?

Clan structures are found in many cultures. But it does fill in a lot of blanks.

If this is what is going on is there going to be anything I can do? From the Christian articles I've read it sounds as if the only person who can break the cycle is the youngest direct victim, and my son won't even discuss the topic.

I wouldn't be comfortable sharing much more than you have either.

In the sense that it's too personal and therefore potentially identifiable or that it runs the risk of attracting even more negative energy?

Oh, and you don't actually need a reiki master. You can heal the energy body yourself. Its just a little easier to have a pro do it.

I'm trying to step up my energy work but am not (yet) feeling any improvement. Given my limited results with protective magic I'm keen to engage some expert help!

Thank you, as always for your guidance and support.

[RoseRed]

You can easily find information on uncrossings, cleansings, egg rituals, etc. What you're looking for goes beyond 101 work.

I suppose that every article you read or people that you speak with may have a different version of the whole sins of the father thing. I'm not jumping on the demon bandwagon here. The conditions you described in X's childhood were severe enough to cause his breaking without outside interference. That his abuse would filter down to his own son (3 generations already, perhaps more - we don't know anything beyond X''s childhood).

Everyone has different levels of what they're comfortable discussing online. You've given way more information than most that ask for help.

I said earlier (but it's a very long thread) that there's plenty you can do - you just don't know it exists yet. It's more like damage control and bandaids than actually fixing the situation.

What are you doing to step up your energy work?

[hellebore]

I suppose that every article you read or people that you speak with may have a different version of the whole sins of the father thing. I'm not jumping on the demon bandwagon here. The conditions you described in X's childhood were severe enough to cause his breaking without outside interference. That his abuse would filter down to his own son (3 generations already, perhaps more - we don't know anything beyond X''s childhood).

Yes, I had never considered a supernatural cause for the abusive behaviours - there seemed plenty of psychological ones. The pattern and volume of ill-luck I've been experiencing is the one thing for which there is no potential psychological explanation.

I meditated on the situation this morning and what came to me was that a curse put on me years ago has behind it the power and force of all the repressed rage and resentment that snowballed between fathers and sons in X's family down the generations. The curse had a primary purpose - harming and hampering me, and has acquired a secondary purpose - a psychic safety valve or vomit bag for all the accumulated rage to come out ... the fact it's over me and mine is almost coincidental. However, X associates it with feelings of relief and that's why he still takes deliberate steps to perpetuate it. Does that make any sense? It could just be my mind scrabbling to rationalise things.

Everyone has different levels of what they're comfortable discussing online. You've given way more information than most that ask for help.

It was far more than I would normally ever share, online or IRL. I'll leave it up for a couple of days so all those here who are advising/following can read it and then I'll edit.

It's more like damage control and bandaids than actually fixing the situation.

Assuming I can learn more effective ways of shielding myself, there remains the worrying question of what this might mean for my son, and any children he might have. I have to search for anything in my power to protect future generations. There has been far too much suffering for far too long.

What are you doing to step up your energy work

I've been trying to spend more time grounding myself in nature but the weather has been challenging. I've also been more regular and thorough with my traditional protection measures and have introduced a simple egg cleansing ritual.

Appreciative thanks, as always.

[Shinichi]

I keep reading through this, thinking about how I would go about casting this kind of spellwork, thinking about what I would do to defend against it. You know, analyzing, learning. One little thought keeps popping into my head.

Problems of this degree, this widespread and intense, are not that hard to create for a practitioner that has even a small degree of talent and genuine magical education, if they were to actually do many smaller workings and then weave them all together towards the same ends, creating one big magical net of trouble. I mean, we are talking 17 years here. Consistent operations that are periodically reinforced (the birthday ritual would be an ideal time for such reinforcement, if that is what the birthday thing is), would easily add up to this level of...I don't even know a word to describe what this is at this point.

It certainly takes a "special" kind of person to put that much effort into someone else's suffering, but it's definitely doable. Add in that he apparently has at least a few other practitioners in his court, and it would be even easier to stir up this kind of trouble. It just adds up bit by bit, like a snowball rolling downhill. 17 years is a long time and a lot of energy...

Not on behalf of the children as my understanding is that it has to be done with the individual's will and co-operation and they are both completely freaked at the concept of anything supernatural going on here.

You don't really have to have the recipients permission to work on them, it's just usually polite, and wise, depending on circumstance. But think about this particular context for a moment. Would you ask your son's permission to step in front of a bullet headed his way, or would you just jump first and think later? What's the difference between a physical bullet harming him and whatever this is, if it is something that is harming him? Do you, as mama bear, really need permission to act protectively of your offspring?

One should, of course, always think things through and prepare properly before taking any magical action. But, you should know that you don't need someone's permission, or else your ex-husband would need your permission to have a wax doll of you on his alter. I come from a family environment where I was taught to take care of me and mine, so if I see someone hurting my family, I don't wait to ask if they want my help. I put my foot down and ask for forgiveness later, if it's even necessary. If you want to protect your children from their father and his bloodline, pull on your mama bear shorts and protect them. You don't need their permission.



~:Shin:~

[RoseRed]

Actually, I was talking about the real world effects/affects of that level of abuse in early childhood. There's nothing supernatural about it. It manifests in many ways including mundane cause and effect.

Its very neo/pagan wiccanesque to require permission. Its part of the ethos of the love and light and sparkly rainbow crowd. You should ask them their opinion on this. There are a lot of different viewpoints out there.

[hellebore]

Hello Shin

Thank you for taking the time to study this saga and for letting me have your thoughts.

Just to clarify the issue about permission, which related to cord-cutting. I have no ethical issues whatever taking action on behalf of the children without their knowledge and consent (and do so as and when necessary both magically and IRL); no, my comment reflects the advice I had always been given that cord-cutting cannot be done on behalf of another without their active co-operation simply because it doesn't work. If this is not the case I'll start cutting away tomorrow!!

Problems of this degree, this widespread and intense, are not that hard to create for a practitioner that has even a small degree of talent and genuine magical education, if they were to actually do many smaller workings and then weave them all together towards the same ends, creating one big magical net of trouble. I mean, we are talking 17 years here. Consistent operations that are periodically reinforced (the birthday ritual would be an ideal time for such reinforcement, if that is what the birthday thing is), would easily add up to this level of...I don't even know a word to describe what this is at this point.

It certainly takes a "special" kind of person to put that much effort into someone else's suffering, but it's definitely doable. Add in that he apparently has at least a few other practitioners in his court, and it would be even easier to stir up this kind of trouble. It just adds up bit by bit, like a snowball rolling downhill. 17 years is a long time and a lot of energy...

That's such an interesting perspective. Whether he still has access to the original witches or other practitioners I do not know.

My inevitable question, Shin, is if your hypothesis is correct, what options might there be for stopping the attacks? Can I (or an experienced practitioner) do more than try to build increasingly robust defences?

Could I also ask what your perspective is on the concept of The Sins of the Father, which you will have seen is another possibility being considered?

I accept that the whole mess may have more than one root cause and am working on the assumption that finding an effective long-term solution is likely to depend on accurate assessment of the offensive measures being used.

My thanks again for your help and input.

[hellebore]

Its very neo/pagan wiccanesque to require permission. Its part of the ethos of the love and light and sparkly rainbow crowd. You should ask them their opinion on this. There are a lot of different viewpoints out there.

Hi Rose

Been there, done that, realise I've wasted painful years in the process .... white light, rose quartz and rising above negativity are all very lovely, but ... (you know what I'm going to say [eg]

[RoseRed]

[rofl] [rofl] [rofl] [rofl]

I decorate with softball sized chunks of rose quartz. I even get them as gifts. ((The tealight holders)

Not quite what I meant

[Shinichi]

My inevitable question, Shin, is if your hypothesis is correct, what options might there be for stopping the attacks? Can I (or an experienced practitioner) do more than try to build increasingly robust defences?

Eh, depends on temperament and skill. Last time someone tried to hex my family, my mother built a massive Ward around her entire farm with a "return all harm to sender" clause in it, and I put a curse of my own on the individual I knew initiated things. Suffice to say, he had an unpleasant time for the following year or so.

But there's nothing wrong with simply building defenses. There's a decision you have to make every time self-defense comes up. One, you can purely defend, negate what is being done to you and go on with life like nothing every happened. Two, you can strike back, and destroy the person attacking you so that they cannot attack you again. You have to make this decision with every single self-defense situation you ever get into, because every situation and every attacker is different. Most times, pure defense is a good choice, because most people back down after realizing you're not an easy mark or maybe your defense is just so good that it doesn't matter how hard they try. Sometimes, though, an attacker won't stop no matter what, and you'll have to stop him by making it so that he can no longer attack - whether that is by breaking him or running away or something else, that too is a choice one has to make in the moment. These are things that every Warrior has to learn and consider, whether it's in Martial Arts or Magical Warfare. No two combat situations are ever the same, and only you can decide what you are comfortable with.

Personally, I would do something that would probably cause a lot of hurt to whatever the source of all this is, but there's really nothing wrong with playing defensive. Once you learn how to actually play defensive well, there's a lot you can do to protect yourself.

But besides all that, the first thing I would like to do is second the suggestion that you build an ancestral alter and start ancestor work, most especially since your mother has already come to you of her own accord. It is not usually easy for ancestors to show up by their own strength to help you. Building a shrine, making offerings, and similar traditional rites will give them strength and invitation, and they will help protect you against whatever they are strong enough to take on. Which may well not be everything, but it could lessen things a bit. Pray to your mother, and any other ancestor you know of who may help, and make offerings for your gratitude and their strength. Even besides love, they have their own basic interest in keeping the bloodline going safe and sound. Your blood is their blood. Your children's blood is their blood. It is in their interest to keep their blood going for many more generations, so naturally they tend to do anything they can.

In that same line of thought, you may also petition any deities or saints you hold connection with for help, depending on how religious you are. Different spiritual traditions have different deities and rites for this sort of thing, so I can't give much specific advice there. That's something personal to you. I can say that in my own path, I would call on Thor (and have, many times). He is known for his love of humans as well as his battles against giants and other beings who cause trouble for humans, and Thor's Might is often called on for protection as such in the Northern Tradition. That's also why the "Thor's Hammer" pendant is one of the single most common artifacts found in Northern Europe from the pre-Christian times.

You might also look into doing workings that "claim" your space and life, meaning something like Wards. Like the thing I mentioned with my mother, her first step of defense was to march around the entirety of her property line, anointing every step, and praying that no harm may come to her land or those who live upon it (with the return to sender bit, and a few other bits added on). The "hedge of protection," she calls it, from a biblical verse that says something similar. By spiritually "claiming" her space, and every living thing within it, she created a separation of space where certain things could not pass the border. Kind of like the common Wiccan idea of the "magick circle," where the inside is separate from the outside, except you make a really big psychic space that encompasses your entire life, land, and blood if you want to go that far. It's not necessarily a circle when you do it this way, but since you're probably familiar with the Wiccan Circle, it's pretty much the same general idea. Just bigger. Once you've claimed this Domain as yours, you can do all kinds of things to and with it, including posting "keep out harmful intent" signs.

Other than this kind of stuff, everyone else's advice is really good. There's not much you know how to do at the moment in the way of advanced defense, and learning takes time, so petitioning help from your ancestors and whatever gods you favor and seeking help from professionals like a Reiki Master will be good for you. There are plenty of things that I would do, but I'm not really sure how to advise you on such workings without you having the prerequisite learning. I don't want to confuse you or overwhelm you, especially when you already have tons of good advice in this thread.

Could I also ask what your perspective is on the concept of The Sins of the Father, which you will have seen is another possibility being considered?

I feel like the grandfather, the exes father, is one of the major roots of that even though it probably goes back further. Mainly because I have experience with that particular kind of man, and I know what kind of problems they can cause both psychologically and metaphysically on everyone around them. In some of the circles that I run in, I encounter grandpa's type every now and then, and it rarely has a happily ever after when children come into the equation. It is most likely part of what's happened to you throughout all of this, even if it's purely a psychological thing where your ex is just messed up.

Shit does get passed down from parent to child. And when you have the kind of funky mojo that grandpa created with his whole noble-wannabe household-with-an-abusive-head thing, that's some really complicated shit to pass down. Most especially since he did claim Head. Traditionally, the Household Head has certain powers and responsibilities, and when a Head abuses the power associated with his position the entire House (including subsequent generations) will suffer for it. This is part psychological and part spiritual, because if you read about old family structures (whether it's old Northern Europe in the Icelandic Sagas or Old Israel in the Old Testament), the "powers and responsibilities" of the "Household Head" are spiritual as well as mundane. Be it Father or Mother in charge of the Household, they are responsible for the complete holistic (spiritual, mental, and physical) well being of every person in the House, be they child or servant or animal or anyone else.

To take that power and abuse it like grandpa did is just messed up on every level I can think of, and it's always going to have serious consequences.



~:Shin:~

[RoseRed]

what an amazing post, Shin.

[hellebore]

My sincere thanks for your post, Shin. You have given me much to ponder on.

I am going to take a couple of days to absorb all the excellent advice I have received from yourself, RoseRed, Caerdon and the_spiral and form a plan of action to address the ongoing threat and start repairing the energetic damage. Meanwhile, I can get to work on building an altar, finding a Reiki master and creating a ward round my property. Your story about your mother was inspiring.

It is not usually easy for ancestors to show up by their own strength to help you.

That's interesting. I have had two occasions when I was conscious ancestors had had to put huge energy and determination into visiting; the recent experience with my mother and about 18 months ago a visit from my paternal grandmother (I was very surprised to see her as we were not close and she died when I was thirteen). She was a forceful personality when alive and was roundly expressing her anger and disgust that closer family members were not intervening to help us. In both cases I felt my ancestor almost fighting their way through communicate with me. This wasn't the experience with others who have visited me.

In that same line of thought, you may also petition any deities or saints you hold connection with for help, depending on how religious you are.

I haven't really been drawn to work with any deities but do feel some affinity with the Celtic and Norse pantheons, probably because my ancestry is largely Celtic and Scandinavian. I will meditate on this.

I feel like the grandfather, the exes father, is one of the major roots of that even though it probably goes back further.

Mm, I have rarely met anyone whose energies unsettled me more, even though he always seemed to tread warily with me. Your observation led me to realise that this latest onslaught started shortly after his death earlier this year, when the Head of the Clan thing passed to my ex-husband. Maybe relevant, maybe not.

So, I now have much thinking and planning to do as well as concrete actions to take.

I am trying to think of a way of showing my appreciation to all of you who have been so generous with time and advice, including Powessy and Dalovey. I will periodically post the action I have taken and whether/how it is impacting on the situation and hope in this way I can give back by contributing to learning on the forum.

[Shinichi]

I am trying to think of a way of showing my appreciation to all of you who have been so generous with time and advice

Just do your part. We have equipped you with knowledge and counsel, but we cannot do the work for you. It is up to you to put one foot in front of the other and do the work required of you. If you do your true best with honor and skill, then you have honored those who took the time to help and inspire you, regardless of the outcome.




~:Shin:~

[the_spiral]

Off topic but Shin, I enjoyed the story about your mother putting up the Ward. My mother was a simple Cajun Catholic woman but when she prayed with real intent...damn. Things happened. I would've been scared of her if I wasn't her kid. When it comes to defending home and kin, mamas are the most powerful of all witches. Once hellebore grasps her true power there'll be hell to pay.

[hellebore]

Good Morning All

I thought I'd post an update on my situation.

Using the_spiral and Caerdon's pointers I've tracked down a Reiki master who can see me in a couple of weeks. It's going to involve quite a bit of travel but I'm sure it will be worth it.

Some of you asked whether an object might be being used in the spellwork against me and I honestly couldn't think of anything as I'd long since got rid of jewellery or gifts from my ex husband. A couple of weeks ago I dreamed about a place I have always loved to go walking - it's through a bluebell wood (bluebell woods are not only beautiful but in the UK strongly associated with magic) by a lake. As I thought about the dream I remembered something especially magical that had happened to me there 20 years ago. My then husband (X) and I had taken our two young children on this walk when the bluebells were in flower and as I reached into my jacket pocket I pulled out a tiny golden key - the kind you might use to lock a diary. It was very pretty and definitely belonged to nothing we owned. I was intrigued and enchanted to find this and remember X agreeing and saying he'd definitely keep it somewhere special if he were me.

At the time the fleeting thought crossed my mind that X might have put it in my pocket as a sweet gesture, but it seemed highly unlikely given that our marriage was going through a very rocky patch. I later discovered that he'd been having an affair (not with the woman he is now married to).

Back to the present day. I began wondering whether I had made a false assumption that whatever spellwork X worked or commissioned against me started only when our son was ill? Having since seen what X is capable of, could he have planted an object charged with ill intent on me some years beforehand, doing so in such a way he was confident I would keep it with my jewellery or in my office? Except that I didn't keep it in either of those places. It felt such a magical sign at a sad time that I kept it somewhere far more precious - in a silver box with a lock of my son's hair and his first baby tooth (my daughter hadn't yet had her first haircut). And that's where it had stayed for years, moving with us from home to home, always in my bedroom.

I checked it under a magnifying glass for marks or etchings but couldn't see any. I then used a pendulum and the i Ching to divine whether the key was charged with ill intent. Both affirmed it was. I put it into salt in a sealed container marked with the Algiz rune, whilst I decided what to do. That key did not want to come out of its box and there followed a day of energetic chaos in which we had three powercuts, my daughter fell downstairs and I broke a tooth when I wasn't even eating.

I tried to maintain a sense of perspective. Even if this key was planted on me and even if it was done so with ill intent, it might not be linked with later spell-work. But it won't surprise those of you who have followed my story to know that I felt sick to my stomach with the possibility that by placing it with my son's hair and tooth it *might* have played a role in causing his cancer. That might also make sense of X's overwhelming fear and aggression when our son became ill and his determination to blame my anxiety for manifesting the tumour. I suspect these questions will be forever unanswered ...

I researched on this forum and elsewhere and devised a spell to protect me and mine from whatever energies the key held, returning them to the sender(s) in full and equal measure, nothing more, nothing less. I won't go into the detailed workings publicly but they were something of a hybrid as I wanted to make the spell as meaningful and personal to me and the situation as I could. I wrote my own words, being careful to state that no innocent person or creature should be harmed by the return of energy. This was new territory to me and I was careful to protect myself and I called on my ancestors for support.

As soon as the spell was cast I felt violently sick. I went to bed and during the night developed a fever but noticed that my aura was much lighter and brighter (and it remains so).

One practical problem was what to do with the key. Concealing it on X's property was too risky - he has security cameras everywhere and I was very concerned what he might be able to do with it if he found it. The solution I arrived at was to throw it into a river that flows about 200 m from his house. I did so upstream (obviously), from the village we were living in at the time I found the key. I'm unsure whether the element of water might dampen the spell's effectiveness, but the most important objective was to destroy the key's ability to affect me and mine; the element of returning that energy to the sender(s) was secondary. Having said that my spell was fuelled with very strong emotion and intent.

I still don't feel really well, but what I can report is this. Within 24 hours of casting the spell an organisation I was taking to court for breach of contract unexpectedly offered settlement and yesterday my son phoned to say for the first time in months none of his joints is inflamed with arthritis. He knows nothing about the key, the spell or even the extent of my concerns about the curse.

At the moment I am cautiously optimistic. I'm not hanging out the flags that I've fully resolved the problem and I'm not easing up on protection. To be truthful after so many years of ill luck I'm nervous about arriving at a false conclusion or of tempting fate. However, the developments of the past week have been so positive and unexpected that I felt they might be of interest.

Thanks again to everyone here who has been so generous with time, advice and prompting me to explore avenues I'd discounted.