Thank you for taking the time and trouble to read this lengthy post. I am new to the forum and a novice so please forgive any naivety or confused terminology. I have only a rudimentary knowledge of folk magic and am currently studying elemental balancing.
I have approached my tutor (whom I respect immensely) for guidance but she has suggested nothing more than I have already tried. I have read previous threads to see whether I can resolve my own problem, particularly as you receive so many of this nature, but I am left with even more questions.
In 1998 my 7 year old son became seriously unwell. His paediatrician could find no root cause but I knew instinctively he was in grave danger and as it turned out he had a huge, malignant brain tumour. (He mercifully survived, albeit with many physical and cognitive problems). Before the collapse that led to his diagnosis my then husband became very aggressive about my fears. I received a call from a colleague of his I had never met. She claimed to be studying witchcraft with a powerful male witch whom she had consulted on the matter. His 'diagnosis' was that my son's symptoms were psychosomatic and were being perpetuated by my anxiety. Please know I mean no disrespect in confessing that at the time I wrote the whole story off as crazy (and still view the 'diagnosis' the same way).
During my son's treatment I received another call from this woman, saying that my anxiety over minor symptoms had almost certainly manifested the tumour and that she and her tutor had invoked a guide to oversee my son's recovery in the form of a deceased Chinese fisherman. I gave her very short shrift and told her to leave us alone. She did not react well. I still wrote her off as delusional, although several times during his radiotherapy sessions my son asked why he could smell fish.
My son was given only a 20% chance of recovery and my husband could not handle it. His fear came out in escalating drunken violence and physical aggression, attacking me and smashing our home, meanwhile accusing me of being the cause of the tumour, which he said this colleague had reported might also link to old tragedies in my family of origin.
Our marriage broke up and for the next two years life became as settled as it could with the ever-present possibility that my son might not survive. I met a wonderful new partner and my ex-husband calmed down and worked co-operatively with me in co-parenting our children.
In 2001 my ex became seriously involved with someone I later learned was a friend of this trainee witch colleague. He told me they were keen to start a family of their own and I was genuinely pleased for him. They married and his attitude towards me suddenly and inexplicably became highly aggressive again. He told me I was an unfit mother as I had manifested the tumour and said he and his wife were applying for custody of the children. I was convinced he was experiencing some kind of breakdown and so were the courts. His wife did not become pregnant and they have never had children.
At the same time my life started spiralling into chaos. My partner left me out of the blue, my mother developed sudden-onset Alzheimer's and did not recognise me, my father dropped dead on her birthday and my dearest friend also died. I naively dismissed the notion of a curse until some months later when my children said their father and stepmother had a wax doll with pins in it on some kind of makeshift altar inscribed with my name.
That week my ex husband told me "I would like to slit you from your throat to your belly but instead I'll sit back and watch you die slowly" and I felt so menaced (on a physical level) that the children and I took up friends' offer of sanctuary. I started learning about the darker side of the spiritual world, realising that through ignorance I had left us all totally unprotected from any maleficent forces at work.
My ex-husband lost access rights to the children, I bought a house close to our friends and I developed regular psychic protection practices. Gradually life settled down again until 2011 when my son decided to make contact with his father, partly because he missed the loving dad of his earliest years, partly because he wanted to confront him about the abuse. From that point on we entered another cycle of loss and horror that continued for three years, including my son having a sudden suicidal breakdown in which he tried to kill me, my partner of 6 years ending our relationship without warning, redundancy, more family deaths, and a family member attempting to forge my mother's will. My ex-husband attacked us on many levels including extreme emotional abuse towards both children and hacking into our computers, forcing me to close my business for months. Eventually the chaos lessened and I hoped that his vengeance would die down on our daughter's 19th birthday when he no longer had to pay the maintenance he so bitterly resented. On the contrary, we are beset with another deluge of unforseeable problems; the contractor renovating our cottage going bankrupt in the first week, my son hospitalised with inexplicable and agonising arthritis, my main client cancelling a four month contract without reason or notice being just a few of the latest.
I am experiencing the same terrible fatigue I get whenever we are 'under attack'. I can feel energy constantly being drained from my sacral chakra despite my best endeavours to seal it. Throughout this long vendetta I have tried to keep as strong as possible physically and psychologically but it is proving a losing battle. My acupuncturist freaked me last week saying my life-force is so weak in energetic terms I'm barely alive.
I do not attribute all these problems to psychic phenomena. Some of them are almost certainly plain ill luck, just as my son's cancer was horrible ill luck. I also know some of them can be attributed to the sheer strain of the past couple of decades. Nevertheless, the volume, persistence and pattern of incidents convince me something was unleashed in 1998 that is still at work. I am at desperation point.
Here is some clarification I have seen asked for on other threads.
Strange phenomena
There has been nothing of this nature other than objects going missing and never reappearing during times of peak chaos. However, we have now lived in 5 homes since 1998 and each one has seemed to 'shrink' and darken in appearance over time. This has been commented on by friends who have zero belief in the supernatural.
Energy
A warning sign of 'attack' is always serious and prolonged loss of my energy. Wherever we are living I also start finding it increasingly difficult to move around the house because the atmosphere feels so physically heavy (the only other experience I have had of this was emerging from an intense past-life regression). It's a really difficult sensation to describe. As soon as I am outside the feeling disappears.
Mental health
I have experienced bouts of severe reactive depression since the first 'attack' as well as much anxiety, but no psychotic or delusional episodes. I had no prior history of depression.
My daughter's mental health has mercifully been robust. Other than the one unexplained psychotic, suicidal episode my son has had no major psychiatric problems but does have permanent affective and cognitive problems from his radiotherapy.
Other
Both long-term apparently happy, thriving relationships since my divorce came to an abrupt end at the beginning of times of chaos. Each guy has since told me he has no idea what happened and no real recall other than a sudden and intense feeling of doom and panic around being with me.
We have now lost every member of our extended family and friends remain bewildered by our catalogue of ill-luck, which they would attest is not for want of my taking appropriate practical action. The two who determined to challenge my ex-husband face-to-face both fell seriously ill when planning to meet him. The people I have consulted in spiritual fields have all described a dark impenetrable energy around my ex and even more so around his wife. I know next to nothing about my ex's colleague and even less about her teacher.
What psychic action have I tried?
All the standard defensive and protection measures for self, children and home (LBRP, various visualisation techniques, smudging, space-clearing, seeking assistance from guardians and ancestors).
Cord-cutting several times. A psychic friend first did this invoking Archangel Michael and a massive storm broke. She took this as a good sign but nothing significant shifted.
I suspect that without these measures we would be in an even worse state.
What am I seeking help with?
I'm likening the situation to a physical health problem where you first try home remedies, then your GP, then a local specialist but reach a point where the continuing sympoms dictate the need to search for expert opinion, which I am hoping I can find here. I accept full responsibility for doing the work to effect a cure but I don't know where to begin without a diagnosis and prescription.
I am seeking peace rather than revenge and I assume that counter-spells and the like keep you energetically linked to the perpetrator, which is the last thing I want. However, I'm not a Wiccan purist and am open to considering different viewpoints.
I would very much appreciate thoughts on:
- what kind of psychic attack I/we are under (if any)?
- what counter-actions can be taken at this late stage?
- who these counter-actions should be directed against? For example, whilst I think there is a likelihood trauma triggered latent psychopathy in my ex-husband, he has changed to such an extent that several people say he seems 'possessed'. I am also unclear whether there *could* be any link to historical trauma in my family of origin, which was significant on my mother's side.
Once again, thank you so much for your patience reading through this saga. I've only skimmed the surface of events and I know even that sounds unbelievable. I only wish it were all fantasy. My children have been through so much and it destroys me to see them suffering.
17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
I wouldn't even know where to begin with helping you with something of this magnitude - but I will say that as skeptical as I generally am of claims of being under psychic attack, your account sounds very much legitimate (all the worse). So it doesn't sound unbelievable at all, I sincerely hope you find some way to protect yourself and your family.
As far as practical advice goes, as I said this is way out of my league - I would recommend contacting well respected authors of books on sorcery and psychic self defense. Jason Miller and Robert Bruce are two of the names that come to mind, and both of them, as far as I know, are fairly open to contact via email or their websites. If you've read any other books on the subject you've found helpful, you could also contact the authors of those.
Good luck and God bless.
As far as practical advice goes, as I said this is way out of my league - I would recommend contacting well respected authors of books on sorcery and psychic self defense. Jason Miller and Robert Bruce are two of the names that come to mind, and both of them, as far as I know, are fairly open to contact via email or their websites. If you've read any other books on the subject you've found helpful, you could also contact the authors of those.
Good luck and God bless.
"The path of the Sage is called
'The Path of Illumination'
he who gives himself to this path
is like a block of wood
that gives itself to the chisel-
cut by cut it is honed to perfection"
- DDJ, Verse 27
"It's still magic even if you know how it's done." - Terry Pratchett
'The Path of Illumination'
he who gives himself to this path
is like a block of wood
that gives itself to the chisel-
cut by cut it is honed to perfection"
- DDJ, Verse 27
"It's still magic even if you know how it's done." - Terry Pratchett
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
This... goes well beyond any normal psychic attack that I've heard. I doubt it's a person who is psychically attacking you due to the high magnitude (stealing Rin's word there) of effects and the duration of time you've been under attack.
The more I read the more details seem... odd. Not odd in the way that I say you are making it up, don't worry on that front, you are obviously at the end of some serious malfeasance, but the way these attacks are... it's as if you are being hit by too many things at once. It's...widespread, not very focused, yet persistent and clearly following you and having frightening specific effects.
Due to the fact that your children found a the wax doll on an alter in an obvious hex ritual denotes a curse placed on you which can explain the relationship issues you've had. I believe there are some binding spells in the Witchcraft sub-forum that can help prevent harm and spells cast from certain individual from being cast on you or taking effect... though I don't follow witchcraft so I can't say things with certainty on that pathway. However, if you do decide to do this (don't worry, it shouldn't link you to the person, though I suggest you research it before attempting it... or anything really) I'd do it to your ex, his wife, her friend, and her teacher.
The energy draining you have been experiencing... that concerns me due to you preforming practices and such that are supposed to help prevent this type of thing happening. I suggest looking into energy work in order to help strengthen and repair your energetic body and shields (my main subject of interest and practice is energy work based, clearly), as well as preforming cleansing rituals on yourself and your house, not just space clearing. (go to this topic as it has some things you would be able to try as well as information behind them)
One thing you can do in the interim is to relax your body and mind (whilst retaining a sense of yourself) and reach out into the earth and let it's energies enter you and "replace" some of what you are missing, as well as help calm and ground any conflicting energies. Best to do after doing a personal cleansing.
You mentioned cord cutting... have you done this for everyone involved? What I mean is, did you use it to cut the cords from not only your ex, but his wife, her witch-trainee friend and her master? As well as do the same for your children? Though, from what I've read up on it it's for cutting away lingering ties and wouldn't be too effective against what you are up against.
You mentioned also that you are not a Wiccan purist... by this, do you mean you are a practicing Wiccan and that's how you are able to work spells? or do you mean that you are just open to more than just the wiccan type of spellworking and you don't follow the wiccan pathway of magic personally?
Also, how do you preform the protections and such? For instance, are you more comfortable doing rituals or ceremonies? Or are you more of an impromptu caster?
Finally, you asked if there could be a link to past trauma in family history. I'd say I wouldn't rule anything out, especially if there is history of it. There are family curses that can be passed down, though they follow specific patterns.
Anyways, as it's late here I'll reply more in the morning as I await your reply, as well as try ad think of more that you can do in the meantime.
The more I read the more details seem... odd. Not odd in the way that I say you are making it up, don't worry on that front, you are obviously at the end of some serious malfeasance, but the way these attacks are... it's as if you are being hit by too many things at once. It's...widespread, not very focused, yet persistent and clearly following you and having frightening specific effects.
Due to the fact that your children found a the wax doll on an alter in an obvious hex ritual denotes a curse placed on you which can explain the relationship issues you've had. I believe there are some binding spells in the Witchcraft sub-forum that can help prevent harm and spells cast from certain individual from being cast on you or taking effect... though I don't follow witchcraft so I can't say things with certainty on that pathway. However, if you do decide to do this (don't worry, it shouldn't link you to the person, though I suggest you research it before attempting it... or anything really) I'd do it to your ex, his wife, her friend, and her teacher.
The energy draining you have been experiencing... that concerns me due to you preforming practices and such that are supposed to help prevent this type of thing happening. I suggest looking into energy work in order to help strengthen and repair your energetic body and shields (my main subject of interest and practice is energy work based, clearly), as well as preforming cleansing rituals on yourself and your house, not just space clearing. (go to this topic as it has some things you would be able to try as well as information behind them)
One thing you can do in the interim is to relax your body and mind (whilst retaining a sense of yourself) and reach out into the earth and let it's energies enter you and "replace" some of what you are missing, as well as help calm and ground any conflicting energies. Best to do after doing a personal cleansing.
You mentioned cord cutting... have you done this for everyone involved? What I mean is, did you use it to cut the cords from not only your ex, but his wife, her witch-trainee friend and her master? As well as do the same for your children? Though, from what I've read up on it it's for cutting away lingering ties and wouldn't be too effective against what you are up against.
You mentioned also that you are not a Wiccan purist... by this, do you mean you are a practicing Wiccan and that's how you are able to work spells? or do you mean that you are just open to more than just the wiccan type of spellworking and you don't follow the wiccan pathway of magic personally?
Also, how do you preform the protections and such? For instance, are you more comfortable doing rituals or ceremonies? Or are you more of an impromptu caster?
Finally, you asked if there could be a link to past trauma in family history. I'd say I wouldn't rule anything out, especially if there is history of it. There are family curses that can be passed down, though they follow specific patterns.
Anyways, as it's late here I'll reply more in the morning as I await your reply, as well as try ad think of more that you can do in the meantime.
Time is but an illusion in perception and is only perceived to pass by at the same moments together for us all... which is, quite frankly, me saying to not expect from me in a timely manner!
-I am but a simple wanderer... Though I may be gone for immeasurable time, always do I return.
-I am but a simple wanderer... Though I may be gone for immeasurable time, always do I return.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Thank you both for your speedy responses and kindness.
Rin - I once composed a letter to Caitlin Matthews after reading her Psychic Protection Handbook but felt too stupid to post it in the end. I convinced myself that I just wasn't being thorough or diligent enough in my approach. Until reading many of the threads here I had assumed that my ex had commissioned some kind of curse and that the force perpetuating it was his rage. This trainee witch's approach had struck me as so clumsy, theatrical and overt that I concluded these were not highly-skilled practitioners. I felt the best form of defence was refusing to allow them to scare me. I now realise that appearances may have been deceptive and/or that something other than a simple curse is involved.
Rin - I once composed a letter to Caitlin Matthews after reading her Psychic Protection Handbook but felt too stupid to post it in the end. I convinced myself that I just wasn't being thorough or diligent enough in my approach. Until reading many of the threads here I had assumed that my ex had commissioned some kind of curse and that the force perpetuating it was his rage. This trainee witch's approach had struck me as so clumsy, theatrical and overt that I concluded these were not highly-skilled practitioners. I felt the best form of defence was refusing to allow them to scare me. I now realise that appearances may have been deceptive and/or that something other than a simple curse is involved.
Thank you so much.Caerdon wrote:This... goes well beyond any normal psychic attack that I've heard. I doubt it's a person who is psychically attacking you due to the high magnitude (stealing Rin's word there) of effects and the duration of time you've been under attack.
I see that as a real possibility now. I hadn't contemplated it before. Do you have any feel for what kind of entity?
The more I read the more details seem... odd. Not odd in the way that I say you are making it up, don't worry on that front, you are obviously at the end of some serious malfeasance, but the way these attacks are... it's as if you are being hit by too many things at once. It's...widespread, not very focused, yet persistent and clearly following you and having frightening specific effects.
You have hit the nail on the head. During each prolonged (i.e. years' long) attack it has been like fighting a war on multiple fronts. Utterly exhausting and never knowing where the enemy might strike next.
Due to the fact that your children found a the wax doll on an alter in an obvious hex ritual denotes a curse placed on you which can explain the relationship issues you've had.
Would this hex have focused specifically on my relationships or would its ill intent have been more general?
I believe there are some binding spells in the Witchcraft sub-forum that can help prevent harm and spells cast from certain individual from being cast on you or taking effect... though I don't follow witchcraft so I can't say things with certainty on that pathway. However, if you do decide to do this (don't worry, it shouldn't link you to the person, though I suggest you research it before attempting it... or anything really) I'd do it to your ex, his wife, her friend, and her teacher.
I honestly feel too out of my depth to dabble in any binding or counter spells without expert guidance.
The energy draining you have been experiencing... that concerns me due to you preforming practices and such that are supposed to help prevent this type of thing happening. I suggest looking into energy work in order to help strengthen and repair your energetic body and shields (my main subject of interest and practice is energy work based, clearly), as well as preforming cleansing rituals on yourself and your house, not just space clearing. (go to this topic as it has some things you would be able to try as well as information behind them)
One thing you can do in the interim is to relax your body and mind (whilst retaining a sense of yourself) and reach out into the earth and let it's energies enter you and "replace" some of what you are missing, as well as help calm and ground any conflicting energies. Best to do after doing a personal cleansing.
It is so helpful to know you have expertise in energy work. I followed your link and perform all the cleansing rituals periodically, increasing them in times of greatest attack. Relaxation is not easy but I have always gardened to calm and ground myself (and for pleasure!). I will try your suggestion of drawing up the earth's energies into myself.
You mentioned cord cutting... have you done this for everyone involved? What I mean is, did you use it to cut the cords from not only your ex, but his wife, her witch-trainee friend and her master? As well as do the same for your children? Though, from what I've read up on it it's for cutting away lingering ties and wouldn't be too effective against what you are up against.
Only cord-cutting with my ex and his wife as I thought its purpose was to break emotional bonds. Not on behalf of the children as my understanding is that it has to be done with the individual's will and co-operation and they are both completely freaked at the concept of anything supernatural going on here.
You mentioned also that you are not a Wiccan purist... by this, do you mean you are a practicing Wiccan and that's how you are able to work spells? or do you mean that you are just open to more than just the wiccan type of spellworking and you don't follow the wiccan pathway of magic personally?
Also, how do you preform the protections and such? For instance, are you more comfortable doing rituals or ceremonies? Or are you more of an impromptu caster?
I am not a practising Wiccan and although I'm drawn more to the 'light' rather than the 'dark' side of magic I am open to wider spell-working. I have some casting rituals but tend towards the impromptu. I am a novice at spell-work and am being careful not to over-extend myself.
Finally, you asked if there could be a link to past trauma in family history. I'd say I wouldn't rule anything out, especially if there is history of it. There are family curses that can be passed down, though they follow specific patterns.
Are you able to point me in the direction of any more information? The awareness of any such curse would have been lost in my mother's generation as by the age of 2 she had lost all immediate family.
Anyways, as it's late here I'll reply more in the morning as I await your reply, as well as try ad think of more that you can do in the meantime.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
For such a dabbling novice you clearly state you've done it all. You have quite a bit of ritual experience under your belt as well. That's quite a repertoire of rituals you listed.
Yeah, odd is a really good word here.
Yeah, odd is a really good word here.
When my wings get tired I grab my broom.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
RoseRed
Thank you for replying.
At first the only thing I tried to treat the concept of psychic attack with was scorn. One day I broke down when seeing my reflexologist and these semi-coherent fears came tumbling out. I have always been highly intuitive but had no spiritual practice at the time and didn't realise she did. She helped me herself and introduced me to others who were experienced in earth healing and so on, most of the focus being on my son's recovery. With their help and through reading over the years I learned about protection measures. Beyond perhaps the LBRP I didn't realise anything I've been doing is much more than rudimentary?? My spell casting is limited to extremely basic nature work in line with the beginner's elemental balancing course I'm studying.
To be honest I've spent far more time trying to approach the whole thing from a psychological perspective
(more my background) than a magical one, but that road has led to a dead end.
When I found this forum last week I read through as many relevant threads as I could and I noticed your wise and experienced insights into many people's situations. If you are able to give me any suggestions as to what's going on and what I might do next/differently I would be so appreciative.
Thank you for replying.
I'd definitely describe myself as a novice but not a dabbling one. Offensive magic is something I've avoided exploring for instinctive more than ethical reasons but I'm not sure those fears have necessarily served me and my family well.RoseRed wrote:For such a dabbling novice you clearly state you've done it all. You have quite a bit of ritual experience under your belt as well. That's quite a repertoire of rituals you listed.
At first the only thing I tried to treat the concept of psychic attack with was scorn. One day I broke down when seeing my reflexologist and these semi-coherent fears came tumbling out. I have always been highly intuitive but had no spiritual practice at the time and didn't realise she did. She helped me herself and introduced me to others who were experienced in earth healing and so on, most of the focus being on my son's recovery. With their help and through reading over the years I learned about protection measures. Beyond perhaps the LBRP I didn't realise anything I've been doing is much more than rudimentary?? My spell casting is limited to extremely basic nature work in line with the beginner's elemental balancing course I'm studying.
To be honest I've spent far more time trying to approach the whole thing from a psychological perspective
(more my background) than a magical one, but that road has led to a dead end.
When I found this forum last week I read through as many relevant threads as I could and I noticed your wise and experienced insights into many people's situations. If you are able to give me any suggestions as to what's going on and what I might do next/differently I would be so appreciative.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Spellcraft is simply one discipline of many within the Craft. Not everyone excels at it.
It makes little sense with everything you say you've tried and done that nothing has worked.
You're asking about defensive magic, not offensive magic. Unless you believe that the best defense is a good offense.
I think you need to find a local practitioner. For whatever reason, your juju ain't working.
It makes little sense with everything you say you've tried and done that nothing has worked.
You're asking about defensive magic, not offensive magic. Unless you believe that the best defense is a good offense.
I think you need to find a local practitioner. For whatever reason, your juju ain't working.
When my wings get tired I grab my broom.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
No, my juju most definitely ain't working and I don't know why. I'd rather use defensive magic than offensive but if counter-attack seems to be the only viable option then I'm not closing my mind to it.RoseRed wrote:Spellcraft is simply one discipline of many within the Craft. Not everyone excels at it.
It makes little sense with everything you say you've tried and done that nothing has worked.
You're asking about defensive magic, not offensive magic. Unless you believe that the best defense is a good offense.
I think you need to find a local practitioner. For whatever reason, your juju ain't working.
I've been looking for a practitioner for years, but don't know how to track someone down who's a) effective b) ethical and c) (most importantly) not going to stir up more chaos inadvertently.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
It's an energy attack and it's not like normal spells. You know which chakra it is connected to and you know what color that chakra should be. Explore it within your self and find any slight differences or anything wrong with it. These kinda things are very sneaky and tend to hind themselves within your own energy. It can even have the balls to use your own energy against you.
Think of it like this, if your energy is a bright light blue and there was a small dot of a slightly darker blue would you honestly notice? It's like wearing a white shirt with a spot slightly darker and you don't notice because it practically blends in. What you have is a connection not a hex and you need to break the connection. It shouldn't be too hard just get someone to help you explore your energy. Reiki might help and even an experienced energy worker. This really does sound like something latched onto you because you didn't know any better and that's fine. I honestly doubt the condition of your son is your fault and I wonder if these people might have done something.
The small dot of slightly darker blue spreads over time like an infection causing the things around you to get stronger the further you are connected to it. It moves so slow that it's easily missed even by someone who isn't a novice. What I like to do to prevent such issues is pull my aura close to my body and surround myself with a fake aura. My aura being tight to my skin and the fake aura is out around me like a normal aura would be. Start pulling the aura close regularly and try my shielding style to cut off the infection from the source then try to find where it starts. Also have your son looked at for energy that should not be on him.
once tou find it remove it like gum on the bottom of your shoe. It might resist but know your more stubborn and it should pop right off. It's easy to get rid of and I'm worried that your son is the only one smelling the fish. Sounds more like they are using the poor spirit for something...
Does this help? Did you try this?
Think of it like this, if your energy is a bright light blue and there was a small dot of a slightly darker blue would you honestly notice? It's like wearing a white shirt with a spot slightly darker and you don't notice because it practically blends in. What you have is a connection not a hex and you need to break the connection. It shouldn't be too hard just get someone to help you explore your energy. Reiki might help and even an experienced energy worker. This really does sound like something latched onto you because you didn't know any better and that's fine. I honestly doubt the condition of your son is your fault and I wonder if these people might have done something.
The small dot of slightly darker blue spreads over time like an infection causing the things around you to get stronger the further you are connected to it. It moves so slow that it's easily missed even by someone who isn't a novice. What I like to do to prevent such issues is pull my aura close to my body and surround myself with a fake aura. My aura being tight to my skin and the fake aura is out around me like a normal aura would be. Start pulling the aura close regularly and try my shielding style to cut off the infection from the source then try to find where it starts. Also have your son looked at for energy that should not be on him.
once tou find it remove it like gum on the bottom of your shoe. It might resist but know your more stubborn and it should pop right off. It's easy to get rid of and I'm worried that your son is the only one smelling the fish. Sounds more like they are using the poor spirit for something...
Does this help? Did you try this?
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
I'm not entirely sure about that and it's only because of something I did by accident.Caerdon wrote: I doubt it's a person who is psychically attacking you due to the high magnitude (stealing Rin's word there) of effects and the duration of time you've been under attack.
You see I had this ex who had this girl I really felt like I hated. She was all flirty and the like with him and to be honest I wasn't serious about him because of how he was but I wanted him for myself and I wanted her gone. The energy behind that built up in me and my anger with her focused it on her. I honestly didn't realize That when I released this energy she would except it so willingly into her system. She suffered halucinations, vomiting and reacted pretty violently because she was scare. She was highly convinced it was me and I just believe she excepted my enemy because she was so used to excepting hatred. I won't say I felt bad about it but I will say after that I didn't release energy like that without being sure it was clean.
It's not hard to recreate if you can creat a cocktail that is similar to that persons energy. Most people except automatically what feels familiar and it's human nature. Familiarity can have you with the courage to walk up to a stranger thinking you know them only to walk away embarrassed because you didn't. I don't put words to a spell unless I'm unsure about how the energy will react to a programming. Like this one time I created a storm that had a heavy branch hit our house. It was right above my room and actually cracked some of where it landed but not enough to leak in the house. This happened because I programmed the energy with both word thought and intent without checking how much of them I actually put in. The storm scared the hell out of me and I only believe reversing it worked because I out that fear energy in it to stop it. Reprogramming the energy prior to use so it didn't just eat it up and use it. The water around the house literally moved like little tornados on the ground spiraling up with drops of water. Never used it again after that because it freaked me out that bad.
Most of this was because I simply focused energy in simple ways. Imagin if I started ritual work and focusing energy to hurt someone. Wouldn't it be able to do what is happening to her to someone else? Not to mention if I focus on someone long enough I can see their aura like an odd cloud of moving light around them.
There is also the silent way of attacking a situation. You don't want to send a bolt of light into the darkness you want to send darkness into darkness of a slightly lighter shade. Let the darkness except the similar energy and become familiar with it. The light in it won't be touched because it excepted the darkness and it becomes too late to reject the light if it even notices the light. It's like putting dirt on a white dress and then trying to remove it with a cloth. You thought it was just a piece of your fur coat but you end up spreading it all over. You can wash it many times before it's truly out and still have a faint sign it was on the dress. Very similar effect to adding the small amount of light energy. Without being noticed it can slowly spread making the darkness more gray by simply being excepted. The energy of the darkness will do the work for you in spreading it about if you program the lighter energy to simply spread the message. The trick is doing it so well your excepted like nothing is wrong.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Thank you for your thoughts Dalovey.
Anything that gives me new avenues to explore is helpful. Thank you again for this and for your second post.Dalovey wrote:It's an energy attack and it's not like normal spells.
From your second post am I right that you think this is an energy attack by a person, not some other entity?
You know which chakra it is connected to and you know what color that chakra should be. Explore it within your self and find any slight differences or anything wrong with it. These kinda things are very sneaky and tend to hind themselves within your own energy. It can even have the balls to use your own energy against you.
I experience a blend of colours in all my chakras - always have. The energy leaking out is grey, sometimes from my front, sometimes from my back, sometimes in a steady stream, sometimes in a light vapour. The chakra itself is feels very sluggish, almost blocked.
Think of it like this, if your energy is a bright light blue and there was a small dot of a slightly darker blue would you honestly notice? It's like wearing a white shirt with a spot slightly darker and you don't notice because it practically blends in. What you have is a connection not a hex and you need to break the connection.
Would this be powerful enough to last for 17 years? By what mechanism does it exert its influence over my children and other family members?
It shouldn't be too hard just get someone to help you explore your energy. Reiki might help and even an experienced energy worker.
Reiki has sometimes helped me feel stronger physically and emotionally but hasn't affected the onslaught of events.
This really does sound like something latched onto you because you didn't know any better and that's fine. I honestly doubt the condition of your son is your fault
My genetics or epigenetics may have been involved in causing my son's tumour but so may his father's. We'll probably never know. His early symptoms would have been enough to cause any parent valid worry. I have never given credence to the allegation that I manifested the tumour through anxiety.
and I wonder if these people might have done something.
Do you mean the trainee witch and her master might have launched an energy attack on me? If so, by how does contact with my ex husband and his wife act as the catalyst for a new wave of chaos?
The small dot of slightly darker blue spreads over time like an infection causing the things around you to get stronger the further you are connected to it. It moves so slow that it's easily missed even by someone who isn't a novice. What I like to do to prevent such issues is pull my aura close to my body and surround myself with a fake aura. My aura being tight to my skin and the fake aura is out around me like a normal aura would be. Start pulling the aura close regularly and try my shielding style to cut off the infection from the source then try to find where it starts.
I try to psychically seal my sacral chakra and to guard my aura. I don't understand what a fake aura is.
Also have your son looked at for energy that should not be on him.
Easier said than done, unfortunately. He's 25 now and is freaked by the idea that supernatural energies are involved in this.
once tou find it remove it like gum on the bottom of your shoe. It might resist but know your more stubborn and it should pop right off. It's easy to get rid of and I'm worried that your son is the only one smelling the fish.
It only happened during his radiotherapy sessions when he was 8
Sounds more like they are using the poor spirit for something...
The spirit of the Chinese fisherman?
Does this help? Did you try this?
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
From your second post am I right that you think this is an energy attack by a person, not some other entity?
I honestly don't know what it is I just know it's energy based from what you described. A simple detail can change that but I really enjoy energy work and manipulating it. I once had an entity mess with my sleep and cause me some problems.
I experience a blend of colours in all my chakras - always have. The energy leaking out is grey, sometimes from my front, sometimes from my back, sometimes in a steady stream, sometimes in a light vapour. The chakra itself is feels very sluggish, almost blocked.
Doesn't sound like that makes you feel good at all so to be honest explore this realization and experiment with removing it or whatever you feel you need to do with it. Trust yourself with deciding what to do with this energy.
Would this be powerful enough to last for 17 years? By what mechanism does it exert its influence over my children and other family members?
I don't see why it wouldn't be powerful enough however could you just be connecting things to each other as well? I'm not doubting I'm just open to possibilities but to answer the question yes it can.
Reiki has sometimes helped me feel stronger physically and emotionally but hasn't affected the onslaught of events.
Not surprising I won't let anyone touch me with reiki but I do like the practice. Mostly because of how people feel and how the energy around them is flowing. There are just some who don't cut it and some who do. I however like the practice and want to try and learn it myself so I can know it better.
My genetics or epigenetics may have been involved in causing my son's tumour but so may his father's. We'll probably never know. His early symptoms would have been enough to cause any parent valid worry. I have never given credence to the allegation that I manifested the tumour through anxiety.
That's awesome! To blame a mother like that is bullying...
Do you mean the trainee witch and her master might have launched an energy attack on me? If so, by how does contact with my ex husband and his wife act as the catalyst for a new wave of chaos?
Wouldn't that be a bit hard to control? A wave of chaos? Anyway it's rather easy as being around bad energy causes bad energy but it could also be that your open to bad energy. There are so many possibilities one must consider themselves before the consider an outsider.
I try to psychically seal my sacral chakra and to guard my aura. I don't understand what a fake aura is.
Sealing the sacral? That could actually cause a bit or problem itself I don't recommend it. Chakras happens to be a subject I did look up and intentionally blocking them can cause imbalance in your life and not good ones. A fake aura is a shield playing pretend like a decoy.
Easier said than done, unfortunately. He's 25 now and is freaked by the idea that supernatural energies are involved in this.
It is what is I guess, but I do send my family healing energy every now and then to help them out.
It only happened during his radiotherapy sessions when he was 8
That would freak me out and I don't kno anything about that so for all I know it could trigger things sorry.
The spirit of the Chinese fisherman?
Yes my first thought was why the heck did they bother the poor guy.
I honestly don't know what it is I just know it's energy based from what you described. A simple detail can change that but I really enjoy energy work and manipulating it. I once had an entity mess with my sleep and cause me some problems.
I experience a blend of colours in all my chakras - always have. The energy leaking out is grey, sometimes from my front, sometimes from my back, sometimes in a steady stream, sometimes in a light vapour. The chakra itself is feels very sluggish, almost blocked.
Doesn't sound like that makes you feel good at all so to be honest explore this realization and experiment with removing it or whatever you feel you need to do with it. Trust yourself with deciding what to do with this energy.
Would this be powerful enough to last for 17 years? By what mechanism does it exert its influence over my children and other family members?
I don't see why it wouldn't be powerful enough however could you just be connecting things to each other as well? I'm not doubting I'm just open to possibilities but to answer the question yes it can.
Reiki has sometimes helped me feel stronger physically and emotionally but hasn't affected the onslaught of events.
Not surprising I won't let anyone touch me with reiki but I do like the practice. Mostly because of how people feel and how the energy around them is flowing. There are just some who don't cut it and some who do. I however like the practice and want to try and learn it myself so I can know it better.
My genetics or epigenetics may have been involved in causing my son's tumour but so may his father's. We'll probably never know. His early symptoms would have been enough to cause any parent valid worry. I have never given credence to the allegation that I manifested the tumour through anxiety.
That's awesome! To blame a mother like that is bullying...
Do you mean the trainee witch and her master might have launched an energy attack on me? If so, by how does contact with my ex husband and his wife act as the catalyst for a new wave of chaos?
Wouldn't that be a bit hard to control? A wave of chaos? Anyway it's rather easy as being around bad energy causes bad energy but it could also be that your open to bad energy. There are so many possibilities one must consider themselves before the consider an outsider.
I try to psychically seal my sacral chakra and to guard my aura. I don't understand what a fake aura is.
Sealing the sacral? That could actually cause a bit or problem itself I don't recommend it. Chakras happens to be a subject I did look up and intentionally blocking them can cause imbalance in your life and not good ones. A fake aura is a shield playing pretend like a decoy.
Easier said than done, unfortunately. He's 25 now and is freaked by the idea that supernatural energies are involved in this.
It is what is I guess, but I do send my family healing energy every now and then to help them out.
It only happened during his radiotherapy sessions when he was 8
That would freak me out and I don't kno anything about that so for all I know it could trigger things sorry.
The spirit of the Chinese fisherman?
Yes my first thought was why the heck did they bother the poor guy.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Dalovey are you saying that the likeliest explanation is some powerful malign entity (which is still at work) attached itself to me energetically around the time of my son's diagnosis because I was in such a weak emotional state and that the hex my ex and his wife later made/commissioned (presumably from his colleague and her master) was something separate? If I've interpreted you correctly and if others agree it seems then that I am dealing with multiple strands of attack. My head is exploding [sadface]
You've got me wondering whether my son might have been the primary target of attack and this caused his cancer? (i.e. the curse/entity whatever started its attack much earlier than I have always assumed). He was the happiest full-of-life child you could imagine and all that disappeared with his illness and treatment. Although he is thankfully alive and we see glimpses of his old personality it's fair to describe him as 'lost' in common parlance. I have always attributed it to the known impact of intense cranial radiotherapy, scar tissue from the surgery and, psychologically, to the abrupt and terrifying loss of his childhood. Now I'm wondering whether something maleficent (i.e. not genetic or epigenetic) caused the tumour and as his mother I 'took on' and tried to absorb whatever it was to protect him. I'm thinking of the latest discovery about women being found to have the cells of children they have conceived (and interestingly, sometimes of sexual partners) living in them decades after giving birth. Science is coming up with hard evidence of the age-old mother/child bond. But then who or what would want to attack a healthy, happy 7 year old, unless this could be the consequence of some ancient family curse? And if it did, given his prognosis (only 20% chance of survival) surely his death would have been an inevitability.
Accepting the wisdom of 'know thine enemy' I'm now awash with possibilities. Which I accept might be progress .... any suggestions for how I might hone this down would be much appreciated!
You've got me wondering whether my son might have been the primary target of attack and this caused his cancer? (i.e. the curse/entity whatever started its attack much earlier than I have always assumed). He was the happiest full-of-life child you could imagine and all that disappeared with his illness and treatment. Although he is thankfully alive and we see glimpses of his old personality it's fair to describe him as 'lost' in common parlance. I have always attributed it to the known impact of intense cranial radiotherapy, scar tissue from the surgery and, psychologically, to the abrupt and terrifying loss of his childhood. Now I'm wondering whether something maleficent (i.e. not genetic or epigenetic) caused the tumour and as his mother I 'took on' and tried to absorb whatever it was to protect him. I'm thinking of the latest discovery about women being found to have the cells of children they have conceived (and interestingly, sometimes of sexual partners) living in them decades after giving birth. Science is coming up with hard evidence of the age-old mother/child bond. But then who or what would want to attack a healthy, happy 7 year old, unless this could be the consequence of some ancient family curse? And if it did, given his prognosis (only 20% chance of survival) surely his death would have been an inevitability.
Accepting the wisdom of 'know thine enemy' I'm now awash with possibilities. Which I accept might be progress .... any suggestions for how I might hone this down would be much appreciated!
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
What? Interpret? How in the world did we get there?
I said what I mean and I mean what I said. I have no hidden messages at all and I have no actual way of saying there is an entity at play and I honestly just know energy work and myself. You just confused the hell out of me and I'm not sure how to bring you back where I was going with this. Heck my head is abut to explode itself trying to understand what you said...
Don't interpret me and just take what I say at face value. I have no in between the lines or words in anything I say unless I'm being sarcastic.
I am a firm believer that each life helps the soul understand things from different view points. You might die young, get hit by a car, or end up fighting in a war. I don't like watching suffering myself but I tend to believe it is what it is and you need to work with it.
I'm not a doctor but I do believe brain damage changes a persons personality and actions. Isn't that what your implying from all the scar tissue?
No one can have 100 percent the answers you need without truly understanding your situation. I don't know what your going threw and just gave a new side for you to explore that might help. I didn't think I would confuse you this much at all and kinda regret it. I feel like I really threw your off here...
I'm seriously sorry about having done that or confused you at all.
When it comes to people online take what they say with a grain of salt but still try to learn something new. No one can ever truly understand someone they met via forum. For example a guy on here thinks I'm contradicting myself but I honestly don't understand how he figured that from only bits of information. I have my fiancé read my post so we can talk about them and he doesn't see it because he has known me for five years. I know I can be confusing at times because some people see things and I see something entirely different. It's life oh well I apologized for the comfusion because I know me and moved on. I go a meditation recommendation from someone I don't plan on doing till the weather cools down. I'm not in a rush to follow other people's advice but they are honestly helpful in giving me new roads to look around on. Not to mention they do honestly help me figure out a few things about my self as many situations do. That's what I was hoping to do for you and I didn't intend to confuse you or worry you at all.
You just said you tried so much and I know my style of things can be different or just come off different by how I say it. I have found things I do in other places and ended up with better was to explain it. I also tend to ramble thinking everyone is on the same understanding and should have kept it simply on the tech not the other info but your free to explore it. Not like I could stop you...
My intention was not to tell you what was happening to you at all I don't even know you. My intention was to share my style and a different point of view. Don't interpret what I say because if you do that things get confusing and I think I confused you. just try the new shielding method I gave you and see how it helps or doesn't help. Not everything works for everyone even in energy or magic if you prefer.
While black energy is in my aura it isn't good for it to be on my chakras so I removed it making mine shine brighter. That's what I mean about the gray energy you have on you. I think right now that's all you should Worry about. I'm still kinda thrown for a loop here and I'm starting to think my time in this forum is coming to an end. I don't tend to stay one place too long and I learned what I need here. Got my answer days ago from the nice person who gave me those meditations. The rest is just observations and such...
Additional: it's truly possible you did take on some of his energ I'd do that for my child instantly I'm a firm believer in the mother child bond. When I was young I used to be able to know where my mom was. I still can but its not as depended as when I was young. If I knew my mom was in the store I could walk in and find her without getting lost. It was so obviouse she called me her little alarm. I could just say moms home and no one would think its a lie. I'd even just walk outside and there she was home from work. I did however connect to my mother and depend on her in many ways. I didn't connect to my father because he felt odd I found out later he was on some stuff. My step dad however I did connect to but on a lower level then my mother. Life was better with my step dad and still is so connections like that snapped into plac without. I believe those bonds however are in an odd way optional. One has to want the bond in some way and the more wanted it is the stronger. My mom wanted me when she was very young and I could say our connection is stronger then the one she has with my siblings. It's obviouse to see the relationships are different if one observes. My sisters picked my father because they are more like him and my brother didn't want the bonds that bad so it's not as strong as he got older. I believe not every women has the baby to be the mother and the bond is open for the right mother to come along and take up the role. Just like the right father came along for me and took it up like he's my true father. He believes so strongly he is my father that he once forgot I wasn't his and told people "yeah she needs glasses because on my side of the family our eyes..." No one said anything to him about it they just thought it was beautiful and listened. They do however tease him about it every now and then lol. Our bond is strong like we had blood between us.
I said what I mean and I mean what I said. I have no hidden messages at all and I have no actual way of saying there is an entity at play and I honestly just know energy work and myself. You just confused the hell out of me and I'm not sure how to bring you back where I was going with this. Heck my head is abut to explode itself trying to understand what you said...
Don't interpret me and just take what I say at face value. I have no in between the lines or words in anything I say unless I'm being sarcastic.
I am a firm believer that each life helps the soul understand things from different view points. You might die young, get hit by a car, or end up fighting in a war. I don't like watching suffering myself but I tend to believe it is what it is and you need to work with it.
I'm not a doctor but I do believe brain damage changes a persons personality and actions. Isn't that what your implying from all the scar tissue?
No one can have 100 percent the answers you need without truly understanding your situation. I don't know what your going threw and just gave a new side for you to explore that might help. I didn't think I would confuse you this much at all and kinda regret it. I feel like I really threw your off here...
I'm seriously sorry about having done that or confused you at all.
When it comes to people online take what they say with a grain of salt but still try to learn something new. No one can ever truly understand someone they met via forum. For example a guy on here thinks I'm contradicting myself but I honestly don't understand how he figured that from only bits of information. I have my fiancé read my post so we can talk about them and he doesn't see it because he has known me for five years. I know I can be confusing at times because some people see things and I see something entirely different. It's life oh well I apologized for the comfusion because I know me and moved on. I go a meditation recommendation from someone I don't plan on doing till the weather cools down. I'm not in a rush to follow other people's advice but they are honestly helpful in giving me new roads to look around on. Not to mention they do honestly help me figure out a few things about my self as many situations do. That's what I was hoping to do for you and I didn't intend to confuse you or worry you at all.
You just said you tried so much and I know my style of things can be different or just come off different by how I say it. I have found things I do in other places and ended up with better was to explain it. I also tend to ramble thinking everyone is on the same understanding and should have kept it simply on the tech not the other info but your free to explore it. Not like I could stop you...
My intention was not to tell you what was happening to you at all I don't even know you. My intention was to share my style and a different point of view. Don't interpret what I say because if you do that things get confusing and I think I confused you. just try the new shielding method I gave you and see how it helps or doesn't help. Not everything works for everyone even in energy or magic if you prefer.
While black energy is in my aura it isn't good for it to be on my chakras so I removed it making mine shine brighter. That's what I mean about the gray energy you have on you. I think right now that's all you should Worry about. I'm still kinda thrown for a loop here and I'm starting to think my time in this forum is coming to an end. I don't tend to stay one place too long and I learned what I need here. Got my answer days ago from the nice person who gave me those meditations. The rest is just observations and such...
Additional: it's truly possible you did take on some of his energ I'd do that for my child instantly I'm a firm believer in the mother child bond. When I was young I used to be able to know where my mom was. I still can but its not as depended as when I was young. If I knew my mom was in the store I could walk in and find her without getting lost. It was so obviouse she called me her little alarm. I could just say moms home and no one would think its a lie. I'd even just walk outside and there she was home from work. I did however connect to my mother and depend on her in many ways. I didn't connect to my father because he felt odd I found out later he was on some stuff. My step dad however I did connect to but on a lower level then my mother. Life was better with my step dad and still is so connections like that snapped into plac without. I believe those bonds however are in an odd way optional. One has to want the bond in some way and the more wanted it is the stronger. My mom wanted me when she was very young and I could say our connection is stronger then the one she has with my siblings. It's obviouse to see the relationships are different if one observes. My sisters picked my father because they are more like him and my brother didn't want the bonds that bad so it's not as strong as he got older. I believe not every women has the baby to be the mother and the bond is open for the right mother to come along and take up the role. Just like the right father came along for me and took it up like he's my true father. He believes so strongly he is my father that he once forgot I wasn't his and told people "yeah she needs glasses because on my side of the family our eyes..." No one said anything to him about it they just thought it was beautiful and listened. They do however tease him about it every now and then lol. Our bond is strong like we had blood between us.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Hellebore, very few people you'll find online even have the skills to help you. I'm sure you'll find those that want to charge thousands to help you. There are plenty of scavengers out there.
I think you're best bet would be to find a spiritualist Methodist Church. They do amazing work with things of this nature. That's the best help that I can offer
The thing is, some people just have shit lives and everything seems to go wrong. You can't always find a rhyme or reason for it. I hope you do and you and your family can find a respite from this.
Is there reason you keep leaning towards a family curse?
I think you're best bet would be to find a spiritualist Methodist Church. They do amazing work with things of this nature. That's the best help that I can offer
The thing is, some people just have shit lives and everything seems to go wrong. You can't always find a rhyme or reason for it. I hope you do and you and your family can find a respite from this.
Is there reason you keep leaning towards a family curse?
When my wings get tired I grab my broom.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Only that my ex's colleague told him her master believed tragedy in my family was involved in my son's cancer (in the spiritual sense; there is no history of cancer). It strikes me as a possible line of enquiry as there *was* a great deal of tragedy in my mother's family. As a child she lost them all to TB in the space of three years, other than an uncle (her mother's twin) who committed suicide on the railway after his fiance jilted him when he started showing signs of the disease. My son's unexplained violent suicidal episode occurred at the same age as his great great uncle. Most probably coincidence but I'm open to all possibilities.Dalovey wrote:
I didn't think I would confuse you this much at all and kinda regret it. I feel like I really threw your off here...
I'm seriously sorry about having done that or confused you at all."
No need to feel sorry. I realise you were trying to give me different ways of looking at the situation and that's helpful. I also realise I'm hankering for clarity about what's going on, which may or may not prove achievable.
RoseRed wrote:I think you're best bet would be to find a spiritualist Methodist Church. They do amazing work with things of this nature. That's the best help that I can offer
Thank you for this suggestion RoseRed, which is one I hadn't considered. I'm not sure whether we have branches in the UK but will check it out.
I completely agree that sometimes it's just inexplicable ill luck. What makes me suspect otherwise is that every bout of chaos follows interaction with my ex husband and is consistent in its pattern. The fact he originally involved a witch I subsequently pissed off concerns me but it's the protracted pattern that's the most striking thing.RoseRed wrote:The thing is, some people just have shit lives and everything seems to go wrong. You can't always find a rhyme or reason for it. I hope you do and you and your family can find a respite from this.
Thank you for your kind wishes, which are much appreciated.
RoseRed wrote:Is there reason you keep leaning towards a family curse?
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
I appreciate you and Rose being honest about that and giving me some alternative routes to pursue.the_spiral wrote:And hellebore—I've just been reading and watching this thread unfold but I have to agree with Rose, if your problem is supernatural in nature, has continued unabated for 17 years, and has resisted all the many magical efforts you've already made to mitigate it, it's beyond the scope of people online to suggest solutions specific enough to help you.
I like your suggestion of creating a support network. Finding a Reiki master to help with healing my sacral chakra is something I can get onto immediately. With regard to other professional support, I'm struggling to know how I track someone down who is skilled, ethical and reasonable in cost. If anyone has recommendations for a witch, exorcist or other appropriate person in England (I don't think this is the kind of thing normally taken on by clergy here) I would be most appreciative if you could PM me.the_spiral wrote:You need to find someone in real life, possibly a support network of multiple people—a local priest or witch who can work on the issues in your home, a Reiki master who can heal the damage to your svadisthana chakra, etc.
My gut feel is that this is something invoked or set in motion around the time of my son's collapse rather than a generational curse, but if that trail goes cold I've heard good things of Bert Hellinger and Dietrich Klinghardt's family constellation work. Searching earlier threads there is quite a bit of dialogue between members about how easy it is to trace the origins of a curse or hex, but the responses here seem to suggest the opposite.the_spiral wrote:Generational curses are not easily removed and require a lot of work, sometimes over generations themselves, to heal.
Because the pattern is so distinct, the volley of events so rapid when they occur (I've mentioned only a fraction of them), my ex-husband's personality so changed, and the anger of the witch whose uninvited interference I cut off so evident. It would be truer to say I have reasonable belief that some kind of curse is involved than that I have absolute belief. If a trustworthy professional told me they could detect no such curse or hex after following whatever tracing processes they use I would be surprised but relieved.the_spiral wrote:Why are you so sure this is all connected by a central curse anyway?
I think you're showing completely appropriate concern to ask. Yes, I have had quite a bit of psychotherapy, some mediocre, some very effective. Ironically my therapy with two excellent practitioners came to an abrupt end when one suffered a stroke and the other decided to emigrate (both during periods of 'attack'). You couldn't make it up! I also sought out sensorimotor therapy for complex PTSD which was immensely helpful. If anyone reading is struggling with PTSD or has a loved one in that situation I would highly recommend checking out this form of treatment.the_spiral wrote:A lot of trauma can happen through natural causes alone over 17 years, and its no surprise you'd feel a pervasive sense of doom after all the pain and abuse you've experienced. I'm not being glib here at all, but in addition to your spellcasting have you also sought counseling or therapy for post-traumatic stress?
Thank you for the time and trouble you've taken in trying to help, spiral. As with everyone's input, it is much appreciated.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
the_spiral - I'm not sure what has happened - your post seems to have disappeared??
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the_spiral
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Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
I don't know what happened either! This is the second time that's happened to me lately. At least it was preserved in your quotes.hellebore wrote:the_spiral - I'm not sure what has happened - your post seems to have disappeared??
And if your intuition is telling you it's connected to this witch you may well be right. Is there any way of doing more research about him and his connection to your family? It may give you some clues into how the attack was designed and effective means to block or counterattack it. At the very least it would be valuable information to take to anyone you decide to work with. And for what it's worth you sound very strong, focused and rational here, and you and your children have survived these attacks with your dignity intact, so keep that in mind too. Whatever is happening, you're still winning.
"Follow the path of the radiant life force as she flashes upward like lightning through your body." - Vijanabhairava Tantra
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Would it be accurate to say that all of these episodes include your husband (ex? I think). That his energy is chaotic when he goes through these changes?
I'm having a tingle of a thought...
Have you created any witch bottles for protection?
I'm having a tingle of a thought...
Have you created any witch bottles for protection?
When my wings get tired I grab my broom.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
hello hellebore
I have a few questions of you. first off, have you or your son ever had or experienced sleep paralysis? Second, do you have past life memories of any kind? Third, do you ever hear voices?
Powessy
I have a few questions of you. first off, have you or your son ever had or experienced sleep paralysis? Second, do you have past life memories of any kind? Third, do you ever hear voices?
Powessy
Spirits of evil and good enter into my soul and body, Walk with me down the path of limbo with good on my right and evil on my left walk with me into the light.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Thank you all for your helpful messages.
None of us ever hears voices.
Past life memories is a different story. I had my first spontaneous past life experience when I was ten, stimulated by seeing a painting in a shop. It was very frightening and I still remember all the details very clearly. I spontaneously slipped into that life again in my 20s and later in a past life regression session. I have accessed several other past lives through regression, dreaming or meditation; most of them were uneventful, boring even; one was distressing. I have a strong sense that my son had a past life in WW1 but I have never shared this with him. To the best of my knowledge neither of my children has past life memories, but it could be they don't want to talk about them (I still find it difficult to talk about my first spontaneous regression).
Thanks again everyone for your interest and help.
It's difficult because it was so long ago and at the time I was so preoccupied I took scant notice. His initial connection was training (in witchcraft) a then colleague of my ex-husband who asked the witch to 'diagnose' my son's symptoms. I don't even know much about the colleague other than her first name and approximate age. I could probably track her down but not without the risk of attracting my ex-husband's attention. I remember her telling me that her master was a lot younger than her and I have a picture of him in my mind, but suspect this is something I constructed. In terms of motivation for an attack, firstly I called the witch out on his misdiagnosis that led to dangerous delays in treatment because my ex was so desperate to believe him; secondly I suspect my ex and/or his wife paid the witch to curse/hex me. I can't think where else they would have obtained the wax doll as neither of them is generally interested in the occult.the_spiral wrote:And if your intuition is telling you it's connected to this witch you may well be right. Is there any way of doing more research about him and his connection to your family? It may give you some clues into how the attack was designed and effective means to block or counterattack it. At the very least it would be valuable information to take to anyone you decide to work with.
Thank you for these affirming words, which mean a lot. I think that's where my protective spell-working really has helped. But although my will (and I hope sanity!) are still strong, my health, wellbeing and finances are another matter, and my son is now battling inexplicable arthritis, hence my desperation.the_spiral wrote:And for what it's worth you sound very strong, focused and rational here, and you and your children have survived these attacks with your dignity intact, so keep that in mind too. Whatever is happening, you're still winning.
Yes, without fail they follow either direct or indirect contact with my ex. His energy is extremely chaotic and destructive, attacking in whatever way he can (not just magically). It seems to be fuelled by rage, the rationale for which he has never been able to explain properly to anyone. Outside contact with us he must be behaving more rationally as he has managed to progress his career very well over the years.RoseRed wrote:Would it be accurate to say that all of these episodes include your husband (ex? I think). That his energy is chaotic when he goes through these changes?
I'm having a tingle of a thought...
I have experienced sleep paralysis a couple of times, but not during periods of 'attack'. To the best of my knowledge, my son hasn't.powessy wrote:I have a few questions of you. first off, have you or your son ever had or experienced sleep paralysis? Second, do you have past life memories of any kind? Third, do you ever hear voices?
None of us ever hears voices.
Past life memories is a different story. I had my first spontaneous past life experience when I was ten, stimulated by seeing a painting in a shop. It was very frightening and I still remember all the details very clearly. I spontaneously slipped into that life again in my 20s and later in a past life regression session. I have accessed several other past lives through regression, dreaming or meditation; most of them were uneventful, boring even; one was distressing. I have a strong sense that my son had a past life in WW1 but I have never shared this with him. To the best of my knowledge neither of my children has past life memories, but it could be they don't want to talk about them (I still find it difficult to talk about my first spontaneous regression).
Thanks again everyone for your interest and help.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
I've been thinking about it and I think right now one of your main focus' should be working on repairing your energy system and supplementing the loss of energy you've been having. Once you do that, I think you'll see an increase in the effectiveness of any of the spells and protections that you do. It's part of the reason I suggested you use the earths energy to help replace what you've lost before (though if you feel an affinity to another of the classic elements then you can use those instead, but earth seems to be the easiest to use for most).
You've mentioned going to see a reiki master... what exactly does he work on when you go see him? Does he just cleanse your energy with his? What has he mentioned about your energetic state/body?
Now.. I think you might have to get a little more proactive when you are under an active attack. It seems that all your cleansings and protections aren't getting to the core of the malady, which makes sense when you think of it. it'll mitigate some of it, and will help during the periods of calm between attacks, but you need to strike at the core of it as what you are doing is just skirting around the edges.
Basically, during periods of calm is when you focus alot of your time and energy on recuperating, cleansing your body, mind, energy, home, etc,as well as setting up defenses. During an attack, I think, is the best time to dismantle the core force behind it. This is when you do active bindings, reverse magick, even altered cord cuttings. This is when you do everything you can to dismantle and render the source powerless against you. It is best, just as RedRose and Spiral wrote and find and get someone experienced that you trust to be there with you and to help you. You should be able to find someone authentic out there in the UK without too much difficulty... though don't trust anyone who is going to try and charge you, especially if they demand the money upfront. It's one thing for them to ask, with your permission after explaining what they need and why, for you to pay for any expendable materials, but another for them to charge you £500 or so for them to do anything. As a few people have said, there's alot of scammers out there.
I don't think anyone has asked this yet... but is there anything that happens that sets off the attacks, or some sort of event that indicates an impending attack? I know you've already said that you feel drained and such, but I'm talking beyond that. Is there some sort of pattern that happens? Something unique, perhaps coming into contact with someone or something, or maybe even a sensation or a dream, a feeling that comes over you, a presence felt...?
You've mentioned going to see a reiki master... what exactly does he work on when you go see him? Does he just cleanse your energy with his? What has he mentioned about your energetic state/body?
Now.. I think you might have to get a little more proactive when you are under an active attack. It seems that all your cleansings and protections aren't getting to the core of the malady, which makes sense when you think of it. it'll mitigate some of it, and will help during the periods of calm between attacks, but you need to strike at the core of it as what you are doing is just skirting around the edges.
Basically, during periods of calm is when you focus alot of your time and energy on recuperating, cleansing your body, mind, energy, home, etc,as well as setting up defenses. During an attack, I think, is the best time to dismantle the core force behind it. This is when you do active bindings, reverse magick, even altered cord cuttings. This is when you do everything you can to dismantle and render the source powerless against you. It is best, just as RedRose and Spiral wrote and find and get someone experienced that you trust to be there with you and to help you. You should be able to find someone authentic out there in the UK without too much difficulty... though don't trust anyone who is going to try and charge you, especially if they demand the money upfront. It's one thing for them to ask, with your permission after explaining what they need and why, for you to pay for any expendable materials, but another for them to charge you £500 or so for them to do anything. As a few people have said, there's alot of scammers out there.
I don't think anyone has asked this yet... but is there anything that happens that sets off the attacks, or some sort of event that indicates an impending attack? I know you've already said that you feel drained and such, but I'm talking beyond that. Is there some sort of pattern that happens? Something unique, perhaps coming into contact with someone or something, or maybe even a sensation or a dream, a feeling that comes over you, a presence felt...?
Time is but an illusion in perception and is only perceived to pass by at the same moments together for us all... which is, quite frankly, me saying to not expect from me in a timely manner!
-I am but a simple wanderer... Though I may be gone for immeasurable time, always do I return.
-I am but a simple wanderer... Though I may be gone for immeasurable time, always do I return.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Sleep paralysis in your case tells me you are an allowed soul. Your past life memories also tells me this. If your ex or any of the others that are in this other group are allowed souls that hold ill feelings towards you, they can be the cause of all your problems. A shadow is someone that has the ability to create connections between others. A shadow at the time of your sleep paralysis event moved you slightly out of body and inserted a soul within yours. The shadow then creates a copy of you within them within their higher mind, this is like a teleportation system. If the shadow wants to find you he just enters into the copy inside his higher mind and he is inside of your body connected to you here in this world. The shadows have been creating maps of allowed souls for a very long time, these are like networks that allow them to move from one person to the next in only a few seconds. If someone wanted to hurt you they could easily use this network to do it with even if they were unaware of it. There are many people that think these powers they feel inside of them are theirs but this is not them it is the shadows that give them this feeling. I can break this connection between you and them by removing the two within you that they are using to create your problems with. This will only stop them from finding you but it does not stop the ex from trying to resend the shadow back to you.hellebore wrote:
I have experienced sleep paralysis a couple of times, but not during periods of 'attack'. To the best of my knowledge, my son hasn't.
None of us ever hears voices.
Past life memories is a different story. I had my first spontaneous past life experience when I was ten, stimulated by seeing a painting in a shop. It was very frightening and I still remember all the details very clearly. I spontaneously slipped into that life again in my 20s and later in a past life regression session. I have accessed several other past lives through regression, dreaming or meditation; most of them were uneventful, boring even; one was distressing. I have a strong sense that my son had a past life in WW1 but I have never shared this with him. To the best of my knowledge neither of my children has past life memories, but it could be they don't want to talk about them (I still find it difficult to talk about my first spontaneous regression).
Thanks again everyone for your interest and help.
Powessy
Spirits of evil and good enter into my soul and body, Walk with me down the path of limbo with good on my right and evil on my left walk with me into the light.
Re: 17 years of apparent psychic attack - desperation point
Yes I can see this makes sense and I definitely feel better when I've connected with the earth in nature.Caerdon wrote:I've been thinking about it and I think right now one of your main focus' should be working on repairing your energy system and supplementing the loss of energy you've been having. Once you do that, I think you'll see an increase in the effectiveness of any of the spells and protections that you do. It's part of the reason I suggested you use the earths energy to help replace what you've lost before (though if you feel an affinity to another of the classic elements then you can use those instead, but earth seems to be the easiest to use for most).
It's something I'm planning to do on the_spiral's advice. I haven't had Reiki for years. The only recent objective comment on my energy body was from a well-respected acupuncturist who was bemused at how little life energy she could detect; she described me as "barely alive in energetic terms." Which somewhat freaked me .... as it would! Do you have any recommendations for questions I should ask when choosing a Reiki master to work with me?Caerdon wrote:You've mentioned going to see a reiki master... what exactly does he work on when you go see him? Does he just cleanse your energy with his? What has he mentioned about your energetic state/body?
Yes, I'm reluctantly concluding that defensive measures are not enough. I think I've reached the limit of my current level of skill and I'm going to try to find someone experienced to assist. Having been on the receiving end of this psychic vendetta I'm only too aware of its power and am super-concerned to find someone who really knows their stuff. Surfing the forum I've been amazed how many inexperienced people seem to be blithely playing with fire. (I've also been really impressed with the supportive but firm guidance more experienced members give them BTW - rare to find in any walk of life).Caerdon wrote:Now.. I think you might have to get a little more proactive when you are under an active attack. It seems that all your cleansings and protections aren't getting to the core of the malady, which makes sense when you think of it. it'll mitigate some of it, and will help during the periods of calm between attacks, but you need to strike at the core of it as what you are doing is just skirting around the edges.
The precipitating factor is always contact with my ex-husband after a long spell of no communication. Contact might be direct, but is more often indirect (for example my son calling him or the authorities contacting him about non-payment of child support). The pattern is always the same: contact, then energy beginning to leak but external calm for about ten days, then an ambush of unforeseeable problems that have no apparent link to my ex in quick succession (typically I'd say 5 or 6 major events in the space of 3 -4 months). Because of the aftermath the periods of active chaos seem longer than they are.Caerdon wrote:I don't think anyone has asked this yet... but is there anything that happens that sets off the attacks, or some sort of event that indicates an impending attack? I know you've already said that you feel drained and such, but I'm talking beyond that. Is there some sort of pattern that happens? Something unique, perhaps coming into contact with someone or something, or maybe even a sensation or a dream, a feeling that comes over you, a presence felt...?
I don't feel a presence or receive any kind of portent. There's a sense of foreboding, but I'm sure much of that is a conditioned response or straightforward intuition. Two distinctive things do happen, both energy related. Before the first problem hits I start to see energy leaving my body, always through the sacral chakra, always like grey smoke, sometimes almost as dense as a hose, sometimes just a light vapour. I also have a strong and unwavering sense that someone/something is controlling this energy drain at will, in the same way you control the flow of water from a tap. It happens even if I'm unaware that indirect contact has been made. Then, as the momentum of chaos grows I start to find the energy in my home really heavy. It's exhausting walking round the house, as if I'm having to fight my way through a curtain of sticky energy to get from room to room. My daughter (who's 19 and very intuitive) also senses these energy changes but fortunately isn't hampered by them herself.
Thanks so much for your help Caerdon. I really appreciate the contemplation you're giving to the situation.
Hi Powessy, please bear with my novice questions ... What is an 'allowed soul'? I'm familiar with the concept of old souls but have searched and can't find anything on allowed souls.powessy wrote:Sleep paralysis in your case tells me you are an allowed soul. Your past life memories also tells me this. If your ex or any of the others that are in this other group are allowed souls that hold ill feelings towards you, they can be the cause of all your problems.
The sleep paralysis episodes I can remember occurred years after the first attacks. I might have had them when my son was ill but I don't recall it.powessy wrote:A shadow is someone that has the ability to create connections between others. A shadow at the time of your sleep paralysis event moved you slightly out of body and inserted a soul within yours. The shadow then creates a copy of you within them within their higher mind, this is like a teleportation system. If the shadow wants to find you he just enters into the copy inside his higher mind and he is inside of your body connected to you here in this world. The shadows have been creating maps of allowed souls for a very long time, these are like networks that allow them to move from one person to the next in only a few seconds. If someone wanted to hurt you they could easily use this network to do it with even if they were unaware of it.
I don't really understand the concept of shadows in this context. Are they members of your soul group that wish to control you to settle past-life scores? It sounds fascinating but I'm a bit lost. Can you point me in the direction of something I could read to understand it all better?
Two shadows because I have two attackers?powessy wrote:I can break this connection between you and them by removing the two within you that they are using to create your problems with. This will only stop them from finding you but it does not stop the ex from trying to resend the shadow back to you.
Sorry to bombard you with questions, but finally is there a more permanent solution if this is what's going on? If it's linked with sleep paralysis and I've had that *between* attacks then presumably it proves the point that my ex has been successful in re-sending a shadow to me despite the psychic protection measures I've been using.
I realise I might sound a bit dim about all this and do appreciate your patience.