magic bullies-- help!

[Tourettes]

Hello. I have some issues I require major help with. I'll try my best to be concise.

I am not awakened in the least. I have trouble with controlling my mind. I know the things that go on around me but have yet to "join in" if you catch my drift.

I sorta belong to this one particular Buddhist community that has similar beliefs to CM. anyway because I am aware of telepathy and the sort, I have horrible anxiety because I know everyone is able to see my thoughts. When I'm around someone who can also do this (and I have learned there are a lot more people who can do this than not lately!), I immediately panic and start thinking horrible thoughts which would offend that person. For example, if they are heavy I will start cursing and calling them a fat slob or something. Now I don't mean this. My mind would never go to anything like this prior. It's just the anxiety of knowing I'm at a disadvantage. Kinda like "don't think of a pink elephant." What did you just do right now? Exactly. That's my problem. I'm so worried I'll think something to offend someone that I end up doing it anyway. It's horrible and I'm making a lot of enemies this way. Not everyone understands and even if they do they take it personally. I've been trying my best to do shi-ne' and other meditations but it's just not doing anything for me yet. Sometimes I just feel like someone hexed me and have purposely created obstacles so I won't advance.

Speaking of... here is my other dilemma...

My partner who is a very advanced practitioner is a it fishy to me. I feel like he's always cheating on me with his ex astrally. She is also a rather advanced practitioner. Sometimes I think he's just with me to mess with me and that they both are doing magic on me to either hinder my progress or hurt me or whatnot.

Example...

I've been keeping a dream journal now and writing down what I plan to do. I've been having a lot of success and just started. So for fun I wrote (not seriously) "tonight I will punch her (the supposed "ex") in the face and mess up her plastic surgery." Now my partner has no way to read it but having telepathy he probably already read my mind about it.

Anyway, so around 3am I wake up to go pee and I have a fall down the stairs. I have only a tiny bruise on my leg but otherwise perfectly okay. My partner rushes to me and immediately looks at my face and goes, "is your face okay?"

I know he or she did this to me. I just know it. And this is just one or many examples where if I think of something I wish bad on them for lying and cheating on me, something happens to me later. I can't help but think this relationship is a total farce and he's either using me energy-wise or just keeping me close to control me. I don't know.

But the thing is I need help. They are so advanced that I don't know how to protect myself. Sometimes I think he's the one who caused me to have my "mental Tourette's" so people will hate me. I just don't know what to do and I need some major advice on how to protect myself and make them stop if I am right in my suspicions.

Thank you in advance.

[fraterai]

Occult experiences change the way we view the world. You should definitely be actively tying to control your thoughts but for your own sake, not anyone else's. Telepaths have their own problems to deal with and if they are offended by every thought out there they will surely not use the ability long.

As for your boyfriend having "sex" on the astral, this falls right in line with the same idea. You have very clear traditional notions of what cheating is (sex with someone else), and think it applies to a world beyond the physical. Well what happens when you realize that time is just a convenient vantage point and all of those future women he's slept with that aren't you, is that cheating? Secondly, why on earth are you with this person still, with these types of doubts and fears that they are attacking you.


The only advice I can really offer is that if you are going to be surrounded by occultists al the time you should consider actually practicing, or else get new friends. If they are attacking you psychically there are many, many things you can do (read a book on psychic self defense) that do not require any advanced abilities or extreme skills at concentrating. You should also try and be a bit more mutable to the fact that your worldview is going to come crashing down and rising back up a hundred different times over each in a different way. This is probably your best defense - honesty.

[Tourettes]

Does anyone else have any specific help advice? Sorry, but considering my partner is telepathic and can predict future events, I'd be much appreciative if a lot more members (older members preferably) could give me some emergency step by step advice to help me out. Thank you.

Edit: it's not that I don't agree with you, it's just that they do it to purposely torment me. They remind me of s&m magicians or something. Like they get a kick out of feeling superior. Listen, he can have have sex with whomever-- I just wanted him to practice some "honesty" as you say. He's purposely gas lighting me and abusing me. Making someone fall down the stairs and then laughing about it with his astral lover is not okay. Sorry. They are not respecting my dimension.

As for finding new friends, well, it's kinda hard escaping this world when you've already been exposed to it. There's no turning back. It's no fun being in between worlds.

And I try to practice. But what if I am but they are purposely hindering my progress? I suspect they are hindering my progress out of jealousy or some superiority complex.

[fraterai]

I'm sorry but you're asking how to handle a lion that keeps biting you when you go into the lions den.

You can banish. You can meditate to put a shield around you. You can search for the thousands of protection spells. I can assure you that "older" members than me have come to me for help as well, older does not really mean anything at all. I'm sorry you did not like my advice, but your question is not unique in the slightest. You have two options, defend yourself, which there is no short cut to do and you clearly know how the occult works in general, so meditate or do magic. You said you can't do those well, so you need to cut those sadistic people out of your life. I don't see your motive in keeping them around just to one up them, except for emotional attachment, which is hard to get over I know, but they are abusing you.

Really the superiority complex is you thinking you are special in this situation or thinking that people spend 99% of their time and effort on tormenting you

Good luck with everything and I wish you the best

[Tourettes]

I'm sorry but you're asking how to handle a lion that keeps biting you when you go into the lions den.

You can banish. You can meditate to put a shield around you. You can search for the thousands of protection spells. I can assure you that "older" members than me have come to me for help as well, older does not really mean anything at all. I'm sorry you did not like my advice, but your question is not unique in the slightest. You have two options, defend yourself, which there is no short cut to do and you clearly know how the occult works in general, so meditate or do magic. You said you can't do those well, so you need to cut those sadistic people out of your life.

Really the superiority complex is you thinking you are special in this situation or thinking that people spend 99% of their time and effort on tormenting you

Good luck with everything and I wish you the best

But they are tormenting me most of the time. I didn't have this mental Tourette's until this woman and man came into my life. And I didn't have all these accidents happen to me either. But that's neither here nor there. I appreciate your help but I really need a specific step by step banishing spell or something bc I don't have time to go to the store and find something that works. These people are killing me. One time I came close to slitting my throat because of them-- I *know* it was them and they get off on this. I need serious help before I do end up taking my life or something happens to me. Remember that they know what I'm saying right now so I'm at great risk. They will try to stop me or send people to this message board to give me bad advice etc. I've tried the whole "envision yourself surrounded by white light thing" and it doesn't protect me at all. I even tried the tree thing in shamanism and the next week she posted a picture of herself laughing inside of a tree at some park. They think I'm a joke and won't ever be strong enough to protect myself. So I need some specific help fast. This page is my last resort. I tried asking my dzogchen teacher and the next day my partner got horribly sick and had to have a tooth pulled. And the ex gf's evergy stayed away for a few weeks-- I could tell. So I think he was protecting me and throwing back the black magic at him. But what else can I do if even our teacher can't protect me all of the time? I need something else. And I can't get away from them bc he isolated me to the point that I have nowhere else to go to. They are sociopaths with magical powers-- not a good combo to say the least!!!!

[Desecrated]

I'm pretty sure you have some sort of delusional disorder, and my advice would be to go to a professional doctor and get some help.

[fraterai]

But they are tormenting me most of the time.

Given that you have zero occult abilities, you can not confirm that they are doing this through occult means. IF they are tormenting you through the normal methods, get help, get the police, and for god sakes, get away from them.

I didn't have this mental Tourette's until this woman and man came into my life. And I didn't have all these accidents happen to me either.

You could still just be under the impression these "powerful" people are oppressing you, and are constantly nervous, can't sleep, etc. Again, you can not confirm they are using "occult" abilities to do this, accept for the mentalism they are using to brainwash you, and you are eating it up.

I appreciate your help but I really need a specific step by step banishing spell or something bc I don't have time to go to the store and find something that works.

This is the real reason I'm responding. A few lines later you say you "tried white light and a shaman spell". So please tell me now, why you think you will have success with any other random recipe handed to you? Magic doesn't work this way, we need some level of "personal power", even some level of confidence. So, you asked for a step-by-step on how to fix this, and I gave you one - you need to control your thoughts, and get yourself together, have some level of confidence and control over yourself before you have any success in anything. Just because mine doesn't include salt and swords doesn't make it any less valid, if you read Psychic Self Defense 101 you will know this, but you don't have time even to read a few pages when your life is at stake. Why do you desire to be surrounded by the occult without wanting to try or even read? Des is probably right, you need multiple angles of help on this one, especially talking about physically hurting yourself.

If you are really looking for a "recipe" that will "work" and also probably come along with tons of friends as emotionally driven as you and looking for contact with the supernatural without much effort, I hear getting baptized and singing your heart out works.

[Occultess]

Here's an excerpt from a book called, "Magical Ritual Methods", by William Gordon Gray. He talks about a way to make your mind blank.


He starts talking about the method on page 23 if you wanted to look at the book:

http://www.oldways.org/documents/ceremo ... g_gray.pdf

The greatest weakness of modern Western occultism in general is an
utter lack of order, system, training schemes, and a workable
curriculum for an average student to follow for himself.

This does not mean a lack of occult information. On the contrary
there is too much of it available in the greatest quantities of con-
fusion. The necessity is for information on the practical use of this
accumulated information. We might as well be in a technical library
without being able to read and having no access to any tools or
equipment. Our first need is to learn how and what to learn. Once
this is grasped, the rest will follow naturally.

Experience has shown the best learning technique to be based on
the Nil-principle, or the exclusion from focal consciousness of all
but the essence of the subject under study. This ensures a direct
connection between the subject and the student's deep Inner
consciousness. Magically it is known as "banishing" or "dismissing"
and has less to do with getting rid of demons than isolating a stream
of pure consciousness by excluding all contaminating influences.
The production of such true illumination is of major importance
and maximum priority in any training programme, therefore we are
justified in outlining its procedure here.

The first essential is acquiring the ability of "making the mind
blank" while yet retaining the faculty of consciousness in full
control. This is like being in absolute darkness with opened eyes
and in total silence with alert ears. Outer negation, Inner positivity,
a reversal of ordinary polarity. Until some degree of this art is
obtained, nothing else should be attempted, for out of NOTHING
comes ALL.

Different Systems have evolved various methods of achieving the
same ability, but in the end everyone has to find the way best suited
for themselves by trial and error. The Qabalistic approach
commonly used in the West is to meditate on the Tree of Life as a
whole, and then banish or dismiss one Sephirah after another up
the Tree until the Nil of AIN is reached. This is a reliable method,
but needs a great deal of previous work on the formation of the Tree.

Another system is to imagine oneself in the centre of a
diminishing circle until the Nil-point is reached. Another is to
simply let the mind or senses register whatever they will and refuse
them all as they arise. A well-tried one is the "Not-I" method which
starts by asking the question "What am I", and then rejecting all
else specifically as; "I am not my body—let it cease to affect me. I
am not my thinking—let it cease to affect me. I am not what I see,
hear, touch, taste, smell—let my senses cease to affect me," and so
forth in a sort of Litany. Eventually it is hoped to arrive at the
Nil-point which is identical with the All-point, for a magical secret
is that the more we are NOT, the more we ARE.

It is of course impossible to arrive at an absolute NIL while still
attached to a physical body, but a magically workable approxima-
tion in principle is definitely attainable, and this should be aimed for
before anything else is attempted. The reason for this is simply
because once the ability is attained to some practical degree, every-
thing else becomes possible. It is the one Key unlocking the door
to all the magical Mysteries. The Cypher giving access to every
value. The importance of the Nil-Concept cannot be over-estimated
in magical work.

All Mystery Schools stress the necessity for "detachment" or
"uninvolvement" as a state of being which must be achieved by any
occult operator seeking spiritual success. Few are very helpful with
suggestions about how to achieve this, which is probably because
words are inadequate for that kind of instruction. Once the
attention of students has been directed to the nature of the task, and
they have been made to realise its importance to themselves, they
are expected to carry out their own investigations and conclusions.
Whether it is called "detachment", or "uninvolvement," or any
other term, this truly magical art amounts to a control of con-
sciousness from a very high level. We live from one level higher
than our activities all the time, because we work on something from
somewhere. To fully control happenings on any particular level of
existence we must operate on it from another. If we want to become
anything, we must also "not-become" everything else. Before any
vessel may be filled with any specific content, it must be empty.
Before a single number is countable, Zero must be assumed. No
Creation is possible without the Void. Writing can only be recorded
on blank paper, or sound on a clean tape.

Whatever we choose to call this ability of "switching off" or
zeroing ourselves, it is undoubtedly the pre-requisite for all other
magical abilities, and unless we can develop some degree of skill
with our consciousness in this direction, there is little use hoping
for much success elsewhere.

In times gone by, people valued the power of Zero so much they devoted
whole lives to its achievement, going into solitude
and silence in search of it. This gave them an easy start toward finding
the Nil-Concept, but no opportunity to control it. One adverse
sound or disturbing influence broke their tenuous hold on what they
had gained. They have achieved realisation of the incredible Energy
and Omnipotence behind Zero, but themselves could accomplish
little with it. The true Adept of Nil is one who can attain it at will
amongst every possible distraction, and then direct a stream of pure
consciousness in any direction required.

Though the Nil-Concept may be beyond verbal description, it is
no condition of indifference, apathy, indolence, neglect, or other
human inadequacy. Nor is it mere unconsciousness or any kind of
sleep-state, hypnosis included. It is impossible to be consciousness
of Nothing, but consciousness proceeds out of the Nil-state. Therefore
such exercises as imagining black curtains or other neutral back-
grounds are quite unhelpful. Zero is a state to be achieved by
becoming it and unbecoming all else. Its apparent Negation is
positive, definite, absolute. Once attain it, and everything would be
possible. It is the complete opposite to ineffectuality or impotence,
being concentration of energy to an ultimate extent, and an entire
breakthrough beyond every barrier of being anything. It is utter and
absolute Freedom in the true sense of its meaning. A transcendence
of every possible limitation. Nil and All are identical.

The Nil-Concept can be a dangerous one if misunderstood, and is
no toy for weak minds to play with. Though it is Absolute in its own
state, ordinary human individuals can only attain it within their
particular capacity while they remain incarnate. If they use its
power for the wanton destruction of things held dear by other
mortals, they must expect those mortals to react accordingly and
retributively. Should laws be broken, their penalties will certainly
be invoked, and the nearer to Nil the greater the effect.
In attaining control of All by Nil, the ability of unreaction must
be cultivated. This means that no matter how intense the stimulus,
there should be a nil-response. The maxim to remember here is NIL
by WILL. A difficult art indeed to acquire, needing considerable
practice for even the slightest degree of success. Every Mystery
School has different teaching methods. One drastic example was
to place the candidate in the middle of a circle of Initiates who
then did their best to upset the candidate's balance. They hurled
insults, offered inducements, and generally devised every kind of
distraction they could think of, even to physical blows and noises
of all descriptions. Throughout all this, the candidate had to remain
imperturbable and maintain Nil-control, not by any tortured effort,
but freely and easily as a natural ability. A Christian Initiate was
supposed to demonstrate this reaction-control not only by withholding
response to hostile action but by actually inviting more injuries.
There is scarcely much need for a Circle of Trial in these days
when we live in such conditions anyway. Any Initiate seriously
intending to test the condition of their reactions is advised to attend
a screaming-session of teenage activity and remain utterly unaffected.
Failing this, there are many alternatives such as a traffic roundabout
at holiday time, or a public Baths on a hot weekend. The radio will
provide all noise effects for a trifling cost. Such testing-fields are for
advanced workers however, and others would do better to seek
more favourable training grounds in the privacy of Lodges, Temples,
or personal sanctuaries.

[Occultess]

I'm not sure you'd be interested in much of this (although, maybe you would).

[Occultess]

Symptoms of a psychic attack and protection.

[Occultess]

[Nahemah]

I sorta belong to this one particular Buddhist community that has similar beliefs to CM. anyway because I am aware of telepathy and the sort, I have horrible anxiety because I know everyone is able to see my thoughts. When I'm around someone who can also do this (and I have learned there are a lot more people who can do this than not lately!), I immediately panic and start thinking horrible thoughts which would offend that person. For example, if they are heavy I will start cursing and calling them a fat slob or something. Now I don't mean this. My mind would never go to anything like this prior. It's just the anxiety of knowing I'm at a disadvantage. Kinda like "don't think of a pink elephant." What did you just do right now? Exactly. That's my problem. I'm so worried I'll think something to offend someone that I end up doing it anyway. It's horrible and I'm making a lot of enemies this way. Not everyone understands and even if they do they take it personally. I've been trying my best to do shi-ne' and other meditations but it's just not doing anything for me yet. Sometimes I just feel like someone hexed me and have purposely created obstacles so I won't advance.

Intrusive thoughts are actually quite common, especially when a person is anxious or uncertain. Most people experience them to some degree, however, this can become obsessive and is sometimes a symptom of OCD, in some people.
Also, it should be noted that it is perfectly possible to be suffering from OCD or anxiety issues and still find yourself interfered with by manipulative people. I am not saying 'it's all in your head' by any means, but this bears mentioning, anyway.

Manipulators tend to choose their victims wisely, picking up on those who have anxiety issues, or a lack of self confidence, who've experienced previous traumas or who are otherwise vulnerable in some way. They cannot interfere with strong egos and assured confident personalities, so they target their victims carefully.

Sorta, is confusing are you on the fringe of the group or are you a member?

The telepathy comment is one I'd like to know more about too, why do you believe these people are all telepathic?

Speaking of... here is my other dilemma...

My partner who is a very advanced practitioner is a bit fishy to me. I feel like he's always cheating on me with his ex astrally. She is also a rather advanced practitioner. Sometimes I think he's just with me to mess with me and that they both are doing magic on me to either hinder my progress or hurt me or whatnot.

Example...

I've been keeping a dream journal now and writing down what I plan to do. I've been having a lot of success and just started. So for fun I wrote (not seriously) "tonight I will punch her (the supposed "ex") in the face and mess up her plastic surgery." Now my partner has no way to read it but having telepathy he probably already read my mind about it.

Anyway, so around 3am I wake up to go pee and I have a fall down the stairs. I have only a tiny bruise on my leg but otherwise perfectly okay. My partner rushes to me and immediately looks at my face and goes, "is your face okay?"

Are you certain of the privacy of your journal, as this seems odd and telepathy is not my first consideration reading this statement?

I know he or she did this to me. I just know it. And this is just one or many examples where if I think of something I wish bad on them for lying and cheating on me, something happens to me later. I can't help but think this relationship is a total farce and he's either using me energy-wise or just keeping me close to control me. I don't know.

But the thing is I need help. They are so advanced that I don't know how to protect myself. Sometimes I think he's the one who caused me to have my "mental Tourette's" so people will hate me. I just don't know what to do and I need some major advice on how to protect myself and make them stop if I am right in my suspicions.

Thank you in advance.

Self fulfilling prophecy, you expect bad things to happen after this, so bad things happen.

I can't say anything for sure, without further information, but you are clearly unhappy and anxious and it does read as though someone has been lying to you/ engaging in manipulative behaviours. I highly doubt you are surrounded by 'advanced telepaths' but you are most likely, in the company of very dodgy people.

Sorry, but considering my partner is telepathic and can predict future events, I'd be much appreciative if a lot more members (older members preferably) could give me some emergency step by step advice to help me out. Thank you.

I am a granny, is that old enough? Lol and sorry, but I think I qualify on the age count alone.

Edit: it's not that I don't agree with you, it's just that they do it to purposely torment me. They remind me of s&m magicians or something. Like they get a kick out of feeling superior. Listen, he can have have sex with whomever-- I just wanted him to practice some "honesty" as you say. He's purposely gas lighting me and abusing me. Making someone fall down the stairs and then laughing about it with his astral lover is not okay. Sorry. They are not respecting my dimension.

Why would you stay around someone you clearly don't trust?

I wrote that then read this:

But they are tormenting me most of the time. I didn't have this mental Tourette's until this woman and man came into my life. And I didn't have all these accidents happen to me either. But that's neither here nor there. I appreciate your help but I really need a specific step by step banishing spell or something bc I don't have time to go to the store and find something that works. These people are killing me. One time I came close to slitting my throat because of them-- I *know* it was them and they get off on this. I need serious help before I do end up taking my life or something happens to me. Remember that they know what I'm saying right now so I'm at great risk.

This is worrying and alarming. You need to leave.

They will try to stop me or send people to this message board to give me bad advice etc.

That would not go down well, or end well for those people, as the site is proactively moderated, peopled by active practioners who would not take kindly to such intimidation and I am the gatekeeper here. I can be rather 'bitey'.

I've tried the whole "envision yourself surrounded by white light thing" and it doesn't protect me at all. I even tried the tree thing in shamanism and the next week she posted a picture of herself laughing inside of a tree at some park. They think I'm a joke and won't ever be strong enough to protect myself. So I need some specific help fast. This page is my last resort. I tried asking my dzogchen teacher and the next day my partner got horribly sick and had to have a tooth pulled. And the ex gf's evergy stayed away for a few weeks-- I could tell. So I think he was protecting me and throwing back the black magic at him. But what else can I do if even our teacher can't protect me all of the time? I need something else. And I can't get away from them bc he isolated me to the point that I have nowhere else to go to. They are sociopaths with magical powers-- not a good combo to say the least!!!!

Distance is what you need most. You have to find a way to get out and find somewhere to go. Your efforts, both mundane and magickal should be spent on doing this. The healing and rest can only come once you are away from the baleful influences. I doubt the extent of the magickal abilities of these people, but don't doubt there is mental manipulation going on here.

You can escape and it seems you really need to leave, for your own sake, as whatever it is that is going on around you exactly, it is an unhealthy dynamic for you.

[SolomonsChild]

You need to leave this situation. Immediately.

My sense is that you are being manipulated. Obviously this is an unhealthy and toxic place for you.

Two possible scenarios:

1. Pretend its all magick. There is nothing you can do if you have no abilities. A single ritual would not protect or enable you to deal with this level of skill.

2. Pretend is not magick. You are in a terrible situation with people that are unhealthy.

Either scenario is a scenario where you don't win. Get out. Tomorrow. Pack your bags. Leave. Get away. Don't tell him where you are going and disappear for a while.

[Tourettes]

Thank you all for the advice and help. I will reply in more detail later but wanted to say this first-- it seems that they have lessened their effects on me. Either they are lying low bc they don't want get caught, and/or one or some of you have been doing something to help me since I posted this. If you have, thank you so much and please keep it up if you can. I'll post back later.

[Nahemah]

This is good to know.

I just wanted to say, also, if you are not comfortable with posting some things publically, you can use the pm system to communicate confidentially.

[Tourettes]

This is good to know.

I just wanted to say, also, if you are not comfortable with posting some things publically, you can use the pm system to communicate confidentially.

Thank you. I am also feeling a lot more like my old self from many years ago. I feel more confident and less concerned with the opinions of others right now for some reason which is huge for me.

[chowderpope]

Tourettes, firstly welcome to the board. Secondly I want to reinstate the suspicion that you are giving a magical context to mundane affairs. Do you have a history of mental health issues in the family? It seems to me that you are being paranoid about others around you plotting to hurt you and reading your thoughts, which is a common symptom of schizophrenia.

I am afraid if this is the case then removing yourself from your current living situation will likely not help. Of course if your partner is really manipulative and abusive, GTFO. If this manipulation and abuse is all apparently psychic and mental, you may want to reevaluate the situation and consider that your partner does not want to hurt you, but you are having strong delusions.

I wish you the best.

[the_spiral]

I (and I'm sure others here) would be happy to help out by placing protection around you, but you need to do your part in removing yourself from the situation, otherwise any assistance given will only be temporarily effective.