Advise desired, for I am currently in a bad and menacing state.

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Original post: goblin paste

The state I am in now has just crept up on me, and I haven't felt this way without having smoked weed beforehand. I haven't smoked weed for a week or so, and have given it up - which is a choice I made before I realised the problem. I think I have the symptoms of paranoid schizophrenia, which may have been with me all my life but has been triggered by the use of marijuana. On the occult side of things, I would describe myself as having problems with premature kundalini activation, which was unintentional. I haven't masturbated for a long while - merely due to a lack of time, and am wondering if maybe I should get rid of the sexual energy that may be locked up within me, causing me this problem.

I have little experience with ceremonial magic, apart from a time where I practiced the LBRP once a day for a month or so. I am also wondering if I should start practicing this as to ground myself in a way.

I have little faith in the national health service, and I do not desire to attempt to lessen this problem with presribed drugs - as I don't believe this is the way a problem should be tackled. So I have come here to ask for any recommendations any of you may offer.

My paranoia took off this morning. Hungover, I played some of my rock music very loudly and started imagining dark figures surrounding my room, which freaked me out and caused for me to go on a walk to relieve myself. Also today, if I focus my attention on one thing wearily, I'd start seeing things; mostly memories that would materialise slightly before my eyes of the night before at some night club. The worst of my problem is the uncomfortability I am feeling. It is most intense in my penis and the area between my anus and scrotum - where it feels tight and irritable.

Please don't hesitate to give your advise, I will be greatly appreciative as I do not desire to lose my old self that had no psychological issues apart from trivial, every day problems that we should all be humbly thankful for.

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Original post: Defgarden

Just don't smoke weed I guess. Go for a walk. I suggest just going out and doing something that is totally unrelated to any of this.

Minigolf. Bowling. In fact, I'ma go bowling right now. Strike city here I come!

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Original post: erisdoe

Do you drink a lot? I have found that bad hangovers can cause nasty mental states such as depression and paranoia.

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Original post: goblin paste

I did drink a lot last night, but it's really the first time I've started drinking in a while.

This new paranoia i have can be beneficial, for I feel determined to resolve the problem, and if I'm successful, then God only knows what's instore for me.

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Original post: Gryzlgreedigutt

Look sometimes the only way to pull your head out of the dark sand is to have someone or something come up behind you and give you a HARD kick in the ass. Youre going through "the Dark Night of the Soul". A lot of people go through this and you have two choices. Suppress everything and watch yourself become number and number, or resume your spiritual practice. Which is what I suspect you need to do. Perhaps you picture and feel 'Shadows' because you have not taken control of your OWN LIFE, and you are looking for demonic things to blame? May I suggest the IOB technique? It works!

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Original post: T~Gothe

I would recomend a twice daily practice of the LBRP (once when you wake up and once before you go to sleep) with a follow up of meditation for however long would be most convinient for your schedule in order to to sanctify your body, mind, and your room. This will not act as a panacea for all your problems, but it will allow you to ground yourself to better confront any such dormant issues you may have to deal with.

As for avoiding psychological issues, if they're there (and they are there, in all of us) then they will manifest. There's nothing you can do about this except go on the attack with your finest sword and cut them out in the most efficient manner relative to the root structure of the weed. Of course, to gain an understanding of how the weed grows you'll have to constantly observe it and be on the look-out for it popping up into your life. The meditation will be helpful for that. Only you can find where and what these issues are, and only you can resolve them. Good luck.


PS: If you haven't already, head to your local bookstore and pick up some collections of CG Jungs work (or whatever psychoanaylist you prefer). I've found it to be personally useful, and you might too.

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Original post: Redeemer

And never doubt the virtues of good red wine. It gladens the heart and causeth the spirit to rejoice.

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Original post: Sadb

[QUOTE=goblin paste]The state I am in now has just crept up on me, and I haven't felt this way without having smoked weed beforehand. I haven't smoked weed for a week or so, and have given it up - which is a choice I made before I realised the problem. I think I have the symptoms of paranoid schizophrenia, which may have been with me all my life but has been triggered by the use of marijuana. On the occult side of things, I would describe myself as having problems with premature kundalini activation, which was unintentional. I haven't masturbated for a long while - merely due to a lack of time, and am wondering if maybe I should get rid of the sexual energy that may be locked up within me, causing me this problem.

I have little experience with ceremonial magic, apart from a time where I practiced the LBRP once a day for a month or so. I am also wondering if I should start practicing this as to ground myself in a way.

I have little faith in the national health service, and I do not desire to attempt to lessen this problem with presribed drugs - as I don't believe this is the way a problem should be tackled. So I have come here to ask for any recommendations any of you may offer.

My paranoia took off this morning. Hungover, I played some of my rock music very loudly and started imagining dark figures surrounding my room, which freaked me out and caused for me to go on a walk to relieve myself. Also today, if I focus my attention on one thing wearily, I'd start seeing things; mostly memories that would materialise slightly before my eyes of the night before at some night club. The worst of my problem is the uncomfortability I am feeling. It is most intense in my penis and the area between my anus and scrotum - where it feels tight and irritable.

Please don't hesitate to give your advise, I will be greatly appreciative as I do not desire to lose my old self that had no psychological issues apart from trivial, every day problems that we should all be humbly thankful for.[/QUOTE]
It sounds like to me that you have a good imagination .
My advice is to start writing see if you can vent out
somethings that way . But also go to a
psychologist just to be on the safe side .

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Original post: goblin paste

After sleeping, I feel a lot better and am more or less back together.

Thanks for the advice anyway.

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Original post: Gryzlgreedigutt

Well I'm glad you could waste all our time. Hurry back to this forum, now!

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Original post: goblin paste

No time wasted, I had considered all of your replies and I assure you they have not fallen upon deaf ears.

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Original post: Gryzlgreedigutt

Right. One day your being menaced by demons and symptoms of schizophrenia from of all things not smoking weed and now you "slept it off". May I suggest a playstation 2 next time you are bored?

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Original post: goblin paste

I guess I spoke too soon and was desperate to cast this episode off as a 'one-off', hence my quick reply, which admittedly does make me look like an ignorant user. The symptoms didn't go, however and I guess that leaves me with some problems to tackle - which I either will or will not and is up to myself.

However, if you get agitated when you hand out advise to someone who appears not to be even listening, then maybe you should give up on giving it all together. I'll have you know that I did actually consider you advice, and not on some bleak mundane level either.

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Original post: Gryzlgreedigutt

well I guess when you go through withdrawels you tend to blow things out of proportion. I myself recently quit smoking which was very hard to do and I still fight cravings. So I sympathise. If I didn't I never would have posted. I had to press your buttons after your second post just to make sure you weren't a flake. No harm. You'll be cool. Just practice. You can sit there all damn day with the crowley book in front of you or you can take 15 min to do one ritual and feel fullfillment.

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Original post: Iamu

well I guess when you go through withdrawels you tend to blow things out of proportion.

Especially this particular withdrawal, given the symptoms you were reporting. I'd stay on my toes about this, and avoid alcohol (for that matter, probably all substances) for the time being.

Schizophrenia is thought in some cases to be related to unusually high dopamine activity. It is thought that many with schizophrenic tendencies unknowingly self medicate through the use of pot, which is a dopamine antagonist, meaning it binds to dopamine receptors without stimulating them, which blocks dopamine activity. As one uses pot regularly, the concentration of dopamine receptors increases as the brain tries to raise its levels back to what is "normal" for it, which counteracts the drug's effect on schizophrenia and could concievably lead one to increasing their marijuana usage.

If you have significant schizophrenic tendencies related to dopamine, though, cutting out the pot could very well be what has caused them to manifest more intensely. Now, your dopamine sensitivity is heightened from regular pot use, you've cut out the major dopamine antagonist that kept that sensitivity in balance, and then went and got drunk, which raises dopamine levels even further and screws with pretty much everything else going on in the brain and body... It doesn't surprise me that something a little frightening took place.

My primary suggestion would be to see a doctor, but I would be very wary of any prescriptions they try to give you out the moment... you're unstable as it is, and you're probably better off changing as little as possible of your brain's hardwiring at the moment, given the transistion you're already in the middle of.

My INEXPERT opinion would be, at the very least, stop all recreational drug and alcohol use at the moment, with the possible exception of the pot, if you feel its absence is destabilizing you, and cigarettes, if you smoke.

I hope everything works out.

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Original post: goblin paste

I don't feel addicted to the pot, and have no desire, especially now, to smoke any more. Last night was interesting - as I had a frightening experience of depersonalisation, but what was weird, was that it was followed by a warm feeling of gratitude for life and compassion for others. From then on the effects have been mild and I am now considering starting my practices in magic again.

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Original post: Horus

I'm not sure if this is the case... but... it happens sometimes. Happened to me. Both drug use and quitting drugs (even prescription) can cause it as well as other factors. http://www.kundalini-gateway.org/ksigns.html

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Original post: Horus

It could be a kundalini awakening. Both drug use and quitting drugs can cause it (though I'm sure there are other factors in the case of quitting), and it does happen sometimes. If you think it might be the case I suggest you read up on it... otherwise (if it is Kundalini) the experience could cause you some difficulty later on.

edit - also if this is the case masturbating to ejaculation is in many cases counterproductive. The energy is going to do what it is going to do, and it is best to try to facilitate the process by clearing blockages and allowing as much energy as possible (otherwise wasted through ejaculation) up the spine. Of course you should do more than follow the advice here, research it for yourself and do what is right for you.

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Original post: Sadb

[QUOTE=goblin paste]I guess I spoke too soon and was desperate to cast this episode off as a 'one-off', hence my quick reply, which admittedly does make me look like an ignorant user. The symptoms didn't go, however and I guess that leaves me with some problems to tackle - which I either will or will not and is up to myself.

However, if you get agitated when you hand out advise to someone who appears not to be even listening, then maybe you should give up on giving it all together. I'll have you know that I did actually consider you advice, and not on some bleak mundane level either.[/QUOTE]

Dont get the wrong idea about people here , so far they have been very helpfull to me . Your problem would take some time to recover from but I'm glad you finaly got over it . I wouldn't care if you listened to my advice or not you asked and I gave . I only wish other people felt the same but they dont and you mustn't take that to offence .