OccultForum.org

This may not be the right section, but the forum on spiritual satanism seems to have activity very rarely, so I decided to post my thread where more people would see it.
Those who worship the Pagan Gods believe in reincarnation, am I right? I have a problem with that...
So here's where I'll start: I suffer from severe depression, debilitating in fact, a condition that makes a bad day feel like a month and makes a lifetime feel like eternity. It feels as though I've been in this world far too long, and I'd kill to leave it forever. My surroundings here seem fake and unreal, like a computer-generated simulation. My soul is exhausted and has lost virtually all tolerance to misfortune, and nearly all its ability to enjoy life's pleasures without the help of a substance or two...or three. I'll never take my own life, but living it through to its natural end will be quite a struggle. I know that Enki protects his own...

Okay, my rant is over and I shall now get to the point. My question is, could I conjure one of the Gods, explain my situation, and make some sort of deal to prevent my return to this miserable world? I intend to ask either way, but I'd like to know ahead of time whether you think that there is any hope of a Demon granting my request of being reincarnated no longer. I would much rather cease to exist altogether than live here again. I've read that many black magicians have had a Demon serve them for their early lives, in exchange for eternal servitude to that Demon after their death....serving a Demon for all eternity actually sounds way more inviting than another life here. My dream is to live among the Gods when I die, and basically, I am willing to offer anything in return for that. Anyway, could an experienced occultist tell me if this is even possible? Has it been done? I am still very new to the practice and have not yet even developed my psychic abilities, but I believe and I know what I want. Humanity is growing worse with every century, and so few people worship the original Gods these days, so I would not be surprised if Enki has long since given up on this lost cause of a creation. Thoughts? Advice?

wouldn't you be better off asking for your current life to improve? I mean, if you're going to go to all the trouble of summoning up a fairly powerful god...

I agree with Moth,

It start to get fairly annoying with all these "life is horrible, how can I escape the damnation?" threads.
It is not because my whole path is focusing on the exact opposite, make sure the reincarnation happens and find ways to improve the world.
It is because of these two reasons.

1) There are many, many threads about this on this very forum and section.
Since I joined here I have 2-3 started about this subject.

2) There is a big, really wise religion centered about ending reincarnation, it is called "Buddhism".

They spend their entire lifetimes ending their spirits, it is a fairly big deal.
It is true that my belief goes the other way, but I believe that the souls who choose to end it return into the great stream of energy and is redistributed as chi/lifeforce/prana/mana.

So, technically me and my fellas do find benefits.

But it is not like I can not relate to it, I have suffered from hardcore depression the past 8, soon 9 years.
It feels like everything sucks, there is no meaning to struggle since every time you manage to crawl high enough to see some light.
Nothing gets easier when the problems just keep coming and there are either few or no one there to help you through.

I have a purpose, its rewards are vague and really hard to achieve, but the glory if I succeed will make me immortal.
That have kept me alive and fairly intact while others succumb.

This world is only as good or bad as our champions make it, champions as in the people who are not only courageous enough to find their own path and walk it, but also heroic enough to challenge the entire world.
They are rare, really, really rare, but they exist.

I am not telling you to do not reincarnate or keep reincarnating, but simply do me the favor and hit the world in the face on your way out. [thumbup]
Maybe you are paralyzed by the pain inside, I know the feeling, but as fast as you get the chance, kick the guard in the groin and make a run for it.

REINCARNATION? ARE YOU SURE YOUR NOT BUDDHIST? AS A SATANIST,I LIVE FOR THE NOW,NOT THE "NEVERAFTER". AND AS SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN DEAD,I SAW NO "TUNNEL OF LIGHT" OR "POP IN HIS RED FLANNEL PJ'S" (I WAS RATHER BUMMED ABOUT THE LAST ONE) SUICIDE IS A CHEAP OUT,REINCARNATION IS BS,(AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED) NO MATTER HOW BAD YOU THINK YOU'VE GOT IT,IT AIN'T THAT BAD.

MSOwolf wrote:REINCARNATION? ARE YOU SURE YOUR NOT BUDDHIST? AS A SATANIST,I LIVE FOR THE NOW,NOT THE "NEVERAFTER". AND AS SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN DEAD,I SAW NO "TUNNEL OF LIGHT" OR "POP IN HIS RED FLANNEL PJ'S" (I WAS RATHER BUMMED ABOUT THE LAST ONE) SUICIDE IS A CHEAP OUT,REINCARNATION IS BS,(AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED) NO MATTER HOW BAD YOU THINK YOU'VE GOT IT,IT AIN'T THAT BAD.

Oh.my.gods!
All caps, must be wisdom from beyond the veil.

First, you are not helping...at all.
Depression for a long time is serious business, it eats you away, kills you slowly, like a poison, trust me, I know.
Being ignorant of the pain and treating it like "a bad day on the job" is just...bad.

That kind of depression should be treated with medicine, or by changing your lifestyle, like I did.
By changing lifestyle I mean everything from picking a hobby to joining a monastery.

If you look around, see the human hypocrisy and our eventual doom, it is nothing you shrug off.
As I have stated many times, I am not for slipping out of the reincarnation cycle.
But I accept if others want to, something you too should also accept.

What I want to say is...this is practically a pro-life/pro-choice discussion, and I am saying pro-choice even here, no one should decide that for you, it is your own goddamn soul.


Second...
S/he never said anything about committing suicide, even stating;

I'll never take my own life, but living it through to its natural end will be quite a struggle. I know that Enki protects his own...

Third...
You sound like one must be Buddhist to believe in reincarnation.
You are mistaken in that case, many religions believe in reincarnation.


Fourth...
Go shove your beliefs down someone else's throat, people may not approve my methods or mentality, but I am going to fulfill my role.
Reincarnation is not "bs", it is something people value and want to believe in.
A lot of my own faith rotate around reincarnation, same goes with the OP and I have no idea about Moth.

Just because you think reincarnation is bs, don't express that in a thread about reincarnation.
Especially not when a Scion is present. [cool]


Extra, for SatanicTeen, if you are in need of coaching, I may assist you.
Just PM me and maybe I can coach you, been through hell hole myself, and as Scion I pretty much have the duty to mend spiritual wounds.

Thanks everyone...well, almost everyone. [grin] It's nice to know that people understand, and it seems like I have the power to change my destiny for the better. I wasn't aware that a person could decide what happens to his or her soul, or have any say in the matter.
I'm an aspiring writer and I've been told that I'm pretty skilled, so if I make this world better in any way, it will be through a novel. Knowing the publishing world these days, I'll likely have to make a deal in order to get known.

satanicteen wrote:Thanks everyone...well, almost everyone. [grin] It's nice to know that people understand, and it seems like I have the power to change my destiny for the better. I wasn't aware that a person could decide what happens to his or her soul, or have any say in the matter.

Power for those who deserve it.
The path to greatness require heavy sacrifices, just like body building you need to spend a lot of time and effort to gain any form of power.
Power by appearance, power by politics, power by science, or in my case, power by might.

Power by appearance requires you to spend a lot of money, time and effort to become attractive.
Power by science requires a lot of time, effort and money in order for you to have a cutting-edge mind in discussions.

Whatever you decide to be, you need know which path to wander, what to aspire for and make sure your aspiration is aligned to your heart.
Otherwise, hard fall.
But if you succeed, you will be more awesome than a rocket-propelled polar bear.

satanicteen wrote: I'm an aspiring writer and I've been told that I'm pretty skilled, so if I make this world better in any way, it will be through a novel. Knowing the publishing world these days, I'll likely have to make a deal in order to get known.

You have DeviantArt handle?
There is also a section on this forum for texts.

Yes! Write! Make with the art!

And if you want to use magic to help you succeed, then you may not need much more than sigil magic. A sentence of desire something like:

THIS MY WISH FOR MY NOVEL TO BECOME A BEST SELLER

and awaaaaaaay you go! Of course, first you have to write the damn thing, but as the old joke goes: "Meet me halfway, buy a ticket!"

And on the subject of free will, my favourite words on the subject are from Rush:

"You can choose a ready guide in some celestial voice
If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice
You can choose from phantom fears, and kindness that can kill
I will choose a path that's clear - I will choose free will!"

REINCARNATION? ARE YOU SURE YOUR NOT BUDDHIST? AS A SATANIST,I LIVE FOR THE NOW,NOT THE "NEVERAFTER". AND AS SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN DEAD,I SAW NO "TUNNEL OF LIGHT" OR "POP IN HIS RED FLANNEL PJ'S" (I WAS RATHER BUMMED ABOUT THE LAST ONE) SUICIDE IS A CHEAP OUT,REINCARNATION IS BS,(AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED) NO MATTER HOW BAD YOU THINK YOU'VE GOT IT,IT AIN'T THAT BAD.

All capitals like this is generally viewed as shouting,in internet terms.Please don't do this.It's fine to emphasise one word or maybe a saying or other term this way,but not a whole post or paragraph.

I understand what you are saying here,but perhaps there are other ways to make your point that are not so abrupt? [thumbup]

satanicteen you sound exhausted,do you get much sleep?

I think Moth and Kalicondo have posted excellently and I don't have much more that I want to add,but I recognise this so well:

...a condition that makes a bad day feel like a month and makes a lifetime feel like eternity. It feels as though I've been in this world far too long, and I'd kill to leave it forever. My surroundings here seem fake and unreal, like a computer-generated simulation. My soul is exhausted and has lost virtually all tolerance to misfortune, and nearly all its ability to enjoy life's pleasures without the help of a substance or two...or three. I'll never take my own life, but living it through to its natural end will be quite a struggle.

In fact ,it could be me talking there.Sleep is hugely important to how you feel and a decent night's rest can make everything look a lot less bleak.Easier said than done,though,I know.I'm just curious and if you are having trouble then certain relaxation practices,routines,rituals and other more mundane things such as even small lifestyle/habit/eating pattern changes [and so on ] can be really useful too.
Just a thought.

Those who worship the Pagan Gods believe in reincarnation, am I right?

Not universally,no.

Me,I 'm off to the happy hunting grounds when I shuffle off this mortal coil. [yay]

I don't know if it's an afterlife; or a change of being and form, or whether that means I exist as me no longer,but I 'm determined I 'm not coming back here again to his plane of existence,unless there is a Hell that is,and this is it,lol. [greensmile]

satanicteen wrote:Those who worship the Pagan Gods believe in reincarnation, am I right? I have a problem with that...

Yeah, I gotta say not neccesarily, too. Personally I think that, unless you're a real dork and have done something completely Karmically reprehensible, reincarnation is either an option, or there's considerable lag time between rounds. In any event, that's just my personal belief. My point being that what 'Pagans' believe is unimportant. It's what you believe that counts.

satanicteen wrote:So here's where I'll start: I suffer from severe depression...

Yup. You sure do, and you need professional help to deal with it. You may find sympathy here, but none of us are professionally qualified to treat what you are going through.

satanicteen wrote:My question is, could I conjure one of the Gods, explain my situation, and make some sort of deal to prevent my return to this miserable world?

Well yeah, you could try. But, here's the thing of it...
You know all those exercises that you read about in the 101 level occult books? Take for example, Peter Carrolll's Liber MMM. The exercises in those writings are designed to develop your emotional, intellectual and psychic balance and strengths before moving on to more involved Workings. Honestly, your chances of success are minimal at best.

satanicteen wrote:I've read that many black magicians have had a Demon serve them for their early lives, in exchange for eternal servitude to that Demon after their death....serving a Demon for all eternity actually sounds way more inviting than another life here.

You want something Demonic and satisfying? Here you go:
First of all, no Black Magician has ever come back from the dead and published memoirs about his post mortem employment with an extra-dimensional being.
Secondly, Gods and Demons are not the same thing. Go sort that one out, because you're going to offend something feckin' around with what you don't understand at the most fundamental levels.
Third, if I were a demon or dare I say it, a god, the last thing I would want hanging around me for an eternity is a snivelling depressed teenager.
If you want to sell yourself out to an evil entity for an eternity, go work for IBM or General Electric for the rest of your life. [evil]

I know this is harsh, but you really need to understand that you need to deal with your shit clinically before you start dabbling with the occult, or you're really very likely to just wind up even more messed up than you are currently; like, locked up, and over-medicated in the mental ward messed up.

However, should you choose to follow this piece of advice, then Enki --and others-- will be much more likely to pay attention to you because you've demonstrated your worth to them by taking the reins of your issues, and getting your shit together enough to be standing head and shoulders above the rest of the millions of grovelling lemmings who all think they deserve special treatment.

Now that is a rant... [/rant]

Seriously, go get some help and then talk to Enki. [geek2]

i used to suffer from depression too. I changed my diet (i was vegetarian now i'm not) and the depression went away. try something simple like that before you try to change the order of the universe.

Probably a little off topic but


(Brilliant author BTW, one of my favorites)

As an inspired little Buddha, my suggestion is to look up the Wheel of Life and the Four Noble Truths.
The teachings from the Buddha can start turning depression to happiness. Your depression requires me to say go get help. One key concept is balance, and you seem to be in an extreme state.
A point from the teachings of the Wheel of Life is to come back as a person in the next life because this realm is best to help people's suffering. Please let us know how you are doing or being.

On a personal side, my path has worked co-dependance and addiction therefore with these issues a 12 step group maybe helpful.
Peace
Minatour87