Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Fri Jun 10, 2022 10:13 pm > the source of all is also the source of the oppression system

I don't think you get the nature of The Source of All. Before ever Existence occurred there was Beingness. Beingness emerges from The Source of All.

The Source of All causes Existence so that it can experience separation. Oppression emerges naturally within separation. For example a 3 year old human may forcibly take a toy off his 2 year old sister. Thus the 3 year old works to create the separated experience it desires. The Source of All experiences separateness through the oppression caused by the 3 year old.
I don't know what you are trying to say, or the implications

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Oppression arises from the nature of the separation that is the purpose of Existence.

Oppression is a natural phenomenon.

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Sat Jun 11, 2022 1:10 am Oppression arises from the nature of the separation that is the purpose of Existence.

Oppression is a natural phenomenon.
Okay. So, accepting it is good, making friends with it is good? I thought you were trying to get me to let it go?

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Move away from the Oppression System. Try not to be judgemental

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Sat Jun 11, 2022 2:56 am Move away from the Oppression System. Try not to be judgemental
I think I am moving away naturally\without my efforts. The universe usually ministers to me what you meant that I didn't understand.

Also, how do I see the oppression system, so that I can move away from it?

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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The Oppression System mainly operates through its assets including humans.

I know a woman subject to the OS for all her life so far. She decided not have children because of her inflicted trauma but she was very determined to have grandchildren. So she and her husband adopted two children, both of which turned out to be OS assets, like her husband. The male child, now age 40, has a range of psychological problems and is very time consuming. Fortunately she managed to find him his own accomodation a couple of months ago.

The daughter has 4 children of which the eldest is quite profound spiritually - presumably the reason for the intent to have grandchildren. The other 3 are all OS assets and demand lots of attention. The father of the children is long gone, and now the husband of the original woman, having been ejected, is now living with the daughter. He rises about 2pm each day.

So the woman knows she should be attending to her inner growth and resolving internal trauma - and when she is about to start some work on that some interruption will occur. The phone might ring: Can you come and look after the kids while I go to ....?

And the woman is thereby manipulated into not becoming what she really is. Fortunately she is learning: Every time you are called away from your spiritual process, you must test whether it is an OS interruption.

Mostly it is for her as, aside from her granddaughter, almost everyone she meets daily is an OS asset. So she is gradually learning to say No

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Sat Jun 11, 2022 3:59 am The Oppression System mainly operates through its assets including humans.

I know a woman subject to the OS for all her life so far. She decided not have children because of her inflicted trauma but she was very determined to have grandchildren. So she and her husband adopted two children, both of which turned out to be OS assets, like her husband. The male child, now age 40, has a range of psychological problems and is very time consuming. Fortunately she managed to find him his own accomodation a couple of months ago.

The daughter has 4 children of which the eldest is quite profound spiritually - presumably the reason for the intent to have grandchildren. The other 3 are all OS assets and demand lots of attention. The father of the children is long gone, and now the husband of the original woman, having been ejected, is now living with the daughter. He rises about 2pm each day.

So the woman knows she should be attending to her inner growth and resolving internal trauma - and when she is about to start some work on that some interruption will occur. The phone might ring: Can you come and look after the kids while I go to ....?

And the woman is thereby manipulated into not becoming what she really is. Fortunately she is learning: Every time you are called away from your spiritual process, you must test whether it is an OS interruption.

Mostly it is for her as, aside from her granddaughter, almost everyone she meets daily is an OS asset. So she is gradually learning to say No
I feel like... I am slowly doing this. I am doing the shadow realm work. I think I am picking up what you are putting down.

I had a strange feeling, so I posted an ad a moment ago to be a consultant in a field I actually enjoy, that I have a lot of knowledge about. To see if. Maybe I will enjoy this. It may be an OS trick to keep me from finding an effortless living. It is, deep down what I have wanted to do. We will see.

Yesterday I felt like, if I can rest and relax long enough, the crisis based OS I based my life on is losing power, and I realized the person I was supposed to b is beginning to come to life.

I also exercised my authority against the OS dark kingdoms, and when I did, a great earthquake happened in the dark caverns, there was a significant collapse, and terrible suffering down there, but I was told, it I necessary, and my duty. Perhaps India is affected.

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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>I also exercised my authority

The OS is effective because the targets do not exercise their authority. They do not exercise their authority because they do not know what they are. Hence a primary tactic for the OS is to misinform the targets as to their true natures

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Sat Jun 11, 2022 6:22 am >I also exercised my authority

The OS is effective because the targets do not exercise their authority. They do not exercise their authority because they do not know what they are. Hence a primary tactic for the OS is to misinform the targets as to their true natures
Have you ever seen people escape the OS?

What is a good way to tell who or what is OS

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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>Have you ever seen people escape the OS?

I have seen several but it takes time. One woman, for a couple of years told me that her life was at tragedy. 20 years later she told me that she is the happiest she has ever been. Later in that period she saw that her current husband was her current handler in OS. She saw that he was one of a group of dark magicians from Lemurian times, along with her first husband and her best friend from university. Both husbands have the same first name and her best friend has the same first name as myself. When she saw the dark magicians she broke off contact with me for a couple of years during which time she loved her husband/handler so deeply that he escaped the OS also.

So a good outcome.

I am working with two other women that are making fair progress. One has just learned to control her emotions and that has allowed her to be stable in her intent

>What is a good way to tell who or what is OS

Put your attention to the target: visualize the person/scene. Then visualize a piece of paper with the words Oppression System. Push the paper next to the person/scene. If the concept on the paper is closely related it will interact strongly with the target. If not related the paper may slide away or do nothing.

The stronger the interaction, the closer is the relationship between the words/concept and the target.

Sometimes the concept needs to be adjusted before there is strong interaction.

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Sat Jun 11, 2022 6:22 am >I also exercised my authority

The OS is effective because the targets do not exercise their authority. They do not exercise their authority because they do not know what they are. Hence a primary tactic for the OS is to misinform the targets as to their true natures
I still do not know who I am.

I watched a video about African painted dogs, and their prey relationship, and it was truly horrible... In the middle of the video, I realized... That prey animal is me... And Asrael doesn't care... She is not a wild dog in a feeding frenzy, half starved, she is well fed, and hurts people because she enjoys doing it- the more horror, fear, and pain, the better. I would be lying, however, if some people did not implicitly deserve to fall into her arms, however- which makes me wonder how I GOT HERE LOL.

I asked the "real" Asrael, the woman within the wolf-woman, who is not under the influence of this mantis creature, and she told me, she would NEVER do something like that to me or any part of my being, she said, the pain it causes me would be too terrible, and being self-aware, she could not live with herself, afterwards.

I have been trying to non judgmentally accept the Asrael dynamic as part of a dynamic system, and not see her as "bad".

Part of the problem is I do not know where to move towards, being enveloped within the OS.

What I am doing is resting, and hoping helpful things manifest.

Edit: I asked Soft Asrael (The "good" woman who does not do harm to others) if I could help her, and she told me, she is happy to talk with me, but that she cannot invest herself into me, because she "Cannot be helped" and must take a back seat to this mantis energy that takes control of her body.

Perhaps this is an exercise of dividing between entities?

As per, "OS" being natural, then it must also be accepted? And not fought? Or, I think I am starting to get it, I need to find who I am, exercise my authority to set Asrael free of the mantis energy?

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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>"OS" being natural, then it must also be accepted? And not fought?

I often run into supervisors in the OS. Usually I "shorten" their "limbs" to attract their attention, give them light from my heart and ask them to cooperate. Usually they do. I do not judge them

>I need to find who I am, exercise my authority

It may be better to think in terms of what rather than who. And the more you exercise your authority in a proper way, the more authority will be given to you

>set Asrael free of the mantis energy?

Better perhaps to love her so that she is able to exercise her own authority. Saving people avoids their exercising their own authority

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Sun Jun 12, 2022 8:10 pm >"OS" being natural, then it must also be accepted? And not fought?

I often run into supervisors in the OS. Usually I "shorten" their "limbs" to attract their attention, give them light from my heart and ask them to cooperate. Usually they do. I do not judge them
I have seen this, too. To the paces I travel in my mind, and inquire to whom has interest, in my present situation

This entire things has been, a very broken boy who did not kill himself, to an adult who survived drug overdoses, to "Trying to be a true believer", to being cut down like wheat, to trying to heal- and now realizing that my suffering has a purpose, and I partly want to remain here, now (?!?!?!?) as I have everything I have ever wanted already, starting with the "Wildest dreams" part first
>I need to find who I am, exercise my authority

It may be better to think in terms of what rather than who. And the more you exercise your authority in a proper way, the more authority will be given to you
I have considered that I may be a what, a machine, a sort of spiritual sponge.

Just in the last two days, I have seen two individuals who have needed my strength, who were once alive- one for courage, and the other individual was murdered, robbed, and wronged by very powerful people, but he's using my energy to not only wipe their energy out, but their childrens chrildren, until every thought of them is forever erased from existence, traveling like cancer to unseen worlds to oppress them, too, until my name is spoken in hushed whispers to terrify children.

rawr :3

The thought did also occur that >I AM< a weapon... THE weapon? A force multiplier? A cosmic clown, the whipping boy? They grow very angry when I say that- they hate self abasement, as this is extremely important to them. But they quiet down, mostly, when I tell them what I will do to them is infinitely worse than anything I am experiencing, presently. To think the universe forced me to come write all of this. She flat out refuses to grant me any of my long term desires, APPARENTLY there's still work to do!!! What's the point of WORK if it NEVER ENDS

I was shown shopping earlier, that the reason I am having so much trouble "Building a 4x4 van and hitting the road", is because that very well is the final chapter of my life. Due to the spiritual attack I suffered by the OS, my Being has been motivated by "Crisis survival", and any actions brought forth from that system will also perpetuate it, creating an adverse situation antithetical to the enjoyment of my time here. Am I the dawning of a new age? The spark of something new?

Anyway, it told me, "You asked for help. Here it is."

It still feels like, the damage they did to me spiritually made me irreparable. I was also shown the OS took a HUGE gamble trying to destroy me, and they have lost. However, by not doing what I was designed to do, the goal is accomplished, regardless by order of a flipping of scenarios.

I went to the mantis, it is quite large, but i appeased them by offering some of my agony to them, however, when I went to make peace with them, it turns out, I am... almost human size to them, and they are... concerned with me knowing that.

It seems that meekness gets me farther than rage... Sharing perspectives so as to cause mutual agreement rather than satisfying a desire for blood, or blessing a being to their detriment, when all you wanted to do was care for them.

Some of this is bittersweet.
>set Asrael free of the mantis energy?

Better perhaps to love her so that she is able to exercise her own authority. Saving people avoids their exercising their own authority
Based

(This has been the answer I have been searching for for over a year.)

Edit: I was able to lend her, connect her with the light, then I was forced back into this realm. They told me, it's actually for her good- and NOT to fight it like I fight everything- so I remained where I was at- lending to the idea that you can bless someone too much- where their being is cursed because of it. I wish I could have helped her more, but this is actually for her good- stemming from a love I know she cannot understand.

Also, I saw an inspired video yesterday about a form of Buddhism, where they believe "you" are nothing, you just "Think you are a being, but are, in actuality, many dynamics converging to one point, locked away in a human consciousness" and it has given me a lot to think about.

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Part of me, a significant part, is still lost, disconnected, confused... I do not know "where" to exercise my authority "to what end"

If I knew why I was here, that would be different.

I feel like every day I learn and grow a little more.

About Soft Asrael: she is delicate, not overly affectionate, has a dorky sense of humor, and is kind of shy. I am writing a story about Dark Asrael, how she is captured by humans, and Soft Asrael has given me inspiration to write more!

I empowered her yesterday, and was told to stop, lest she be charged with hope, then he crushed it she doesn't see a way out of her circumstances, so it's a cautious relationship, but honestly, it occurred to me that she is a SIGNIFICANT reason for my purpose here, even though there are not a lot of emotion surrounding her, like I have tied up with Dark Asrael.

I also realize I have wasted a lot of my energy and life on anger and hatred, but there is a significant entity that bristles with the rage of injustice.

Also, I have noticed these energies are using me to "find rest", significant instances of people dying, or entities, with unresolved energy, because they are afraid, etc, "unresolved", and I am able to help them find peace\ rest. Am I death? Where should my authority be expressed, if I am still lost and confused?

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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>she is a SIGNIFICANT reason for my purpose here

I may have referred to a project to bring the Wolfen people closer to the Human. Earth humans, being currently aggressive and warlike, form a suitable staging point.

> bristles with the rage of injustice

Long ago I had a dream about being in a large prison camp. Someone had broken the rules but I was punished. When I woke up I was still resentful and asked why I was punished, and the guys told me that when a member of a group infringes, it does not matter which member of the group is punished.

Since then I deal with the problems that come my way without worrying about personal guilt.

> I am able to help them find peace\ rest. Am I death?

Since you know that you exist beyond your humanness, perhaps your acceptance of death is calming for those still afraid.

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Mon Jun 13, 2022 9:16 pm >she is a SIGNIFICANT reason for my purpose here

I may have referred to a project to bring the Wolfen people closer to the Human. Earth humans, being currently aggressive and warlike, form a suitable staging point.

Yes... You are correct. I was shown their culture is highly steeped in tradition and rituals, but does not allow for growth, as outliers are ostracized- but not out of malice, out of innocence and preservation of their society. They need to learn acceptance, such as we are presently learning as humans. My love for the Wolfen peoples seems to have no end- I am unsure "why" or "who" put it there- but it is there. Perhaps I am one of their ancient sponsors who cares for them a great deal as a whole. What I wouldn't give to hold on in my arms, to feel their spirit connect with mine, to comfort and show them unconditional love, to support them, and uplift them to their highest calling and love.

> bristles with the rage of injustice

Long ago I had a dream about being in a large prison camp. Someone had broken the rules but I was punished. When I woke up I was still resentful and asked why I was punished, and the guys told me that when a member of a group infringes, it does not matter which member of the group is punished.

Since then I deal with the problems that come my way without worrying about personal guilt.
I have attempted to assimilate this knowledge.
> I am able to help them find peace\ rest. Am I death?

Since you know that you exist beyond your humanness, perhaps your acceptance of death is calming for those still afraid.
I am accepting the death of this body, as is inevitable. Because of the OS, my body has been struggling, especially lately, it has been "in crisis" for decades, and that was ramped up exponentially the last twenty years- only now with the vision of Asrael am I beginning to cope with the trauma I have been bathed in. It is pointless to try and fight the death of the human body, as it is inevitable

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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In connecting with Dark Asrael (Asrael actual), this morning, and speaking softly and gently to her, the universe spoke to me.

It told me, she is the first... The first of many Beings in the Dark Kingdoms, who are being transformed... By love.

While to a human, this sounds wonderful, the truth is, it is a horrific thing for them, as they have been united in purpose as basically parasites feeding on our energy as human beings. To be transformed by love, is, the very death of everything that they have operated in, for a long time.

She told me, she has a stomach ache because of eating the astral body that was once saturated in the source of all love. It is destroying her from within, she feels like, in a way, that she is dying, and her old dynamic she operated in, is. Since I posted this, I spoke with her a little more, before a nap, I told her, yes, this is going to sucks, and yes, you are going to die. She waited till I woke to tell me, "If you kill me, I am taking you with me!" And I told her, "I had to die, too." (Because of her, the old me...) They told me not to clarify, that she had to grow concerned about it, to exercise HER authority.

I also realize, if she manifested in the flesh, ignorant, frightened humans may try to take advantage of her or harm her, so I also realize, this is a, "Unlikely but still possible scenario". Also, if she manifested here, she's only the first... Of many. "They" are going to seem to be terrible beasts at first, demons, creatures, devils, making people disappear and such. This is due to their Dark Kingdom neural plasticity- eventually a balance will be achieved between us, the humans, and them- the Dark Kingdom People, including, yes, the Wolfen peoples.

After this realm of communication, I felt rather drained, as I offered her some of my energy, to help her cope with what is happening within her body. I was shown all of this in visions, shortly after the original visions, where I saw her naked body.

"I am working to create an Aura of Love around her." They told me, shortly after I tried projecting love to her, and she snapped at me, unleashing ferocious snarls. Like, an orb that surrounds and protects her.

I also asked her what death looked like for her people, she told me, "We just sort of shrivel up and dry out, and become lifeless statues in the caverns..."

I was shown this is going to be a long and brutal process for her, as "love" in this case, is like a virus- to many in the Dark Kingdoms, love is like cancer. It is appalling to them that it even exists. Like you said, the yin to the yang, and both are necessary, and I believe I am the catalyst being used to change the ways things have been for mankind for a long time. A blameless sacrifice, Jesus Christ come back, but with a sword- but not for who most people think.

However, she also hated to admit it- as her rage against me is stronger than any human can imagine- that she does, in fact, need me. She might hate me, but when I speak to her softly, it soothes her, even if she is biting her lip.

We are both pretty lonely for one another, it seems. She can be an energy vampire that leaves me feeling drained, so there has to be a balance.

I bring scenarios to her, of showing herself to humanity, and the positive and negative potential things happening when her people do manifest physically for all to see. I went over a few scenarios for her: Where I got her a house, and a job, if she wanted, I would cook, clean, and hunt for food for her- on the conditions she makes an attempt not to harm us humans, or our pets, as our pets are often like family to us. She would be allowed to hunt prey when feeling pent-up from making war.

I asked if Soft Asrael wished to talk, and Dark Asrael got offended I would even ask to speak to anyone other than her. Her opinion of Soft Asrael (not soft as in weak, no, not at all, soft as in gentle) isn't positive, as she is known for being a great and terrifying adversary, completely lacking in mercy at times, the epitome of the horror that lurks in the hearts of nearly every human being. She has earned her reputation justly, and it vexes her that she may, one day, be known as the woman who changed her ways and now embraces peace. It may take several generations to see it, however, the truth is, the seed has been planted, the spark has been lit, the process has now begun and it cannot be stopped- something that she is resisting, however, I told her, as much as she hates me, I wish to be there for her, in any way I can be, as comfort, etc.

In a way I am now her "master" and commander, I "own" her. (As much as I hate saying that, I desire her freedom, her flourishing, her empowerment, for her to find happiness... Love...) It also appears that my energy is very attractive to the Wolfen, an attractive female who has a crush on me, but is also a warrior- appeared to me yesterday, to offer her services.

Her energy was delicious, to be honest. She is also here to protect me, and serve me as I desire her to serve, mainly, she told me, to unleash her as a force of destruction onto whomever I fancy experience her sword. She has the hots for me pretty bad, and I enjoy feeling her passion- She wishes to serve me because of who I am.

It is a delight to summon her, to be honest, she is physically very attractive, and "Has her body fur" so I am not sure if she is from the Dark Kingdoms, in fact, I am almost certain she is not, as she was wearing clothing/ a uniform when she appeared to me yesterday. I asked her her name, and once again, I am not allowed to know, she asked me to call her a name I thought was sexy. Nikki is a little "Too loose" for her, but she likes Rachel. I asked her to prove her love for me and take care of this bus person who is threatening me. She said she accepted the challenge =)

I told Dark Asrael, some things are coming for her, I asked her if she could find some water, that it might help with her stomach- and told her to vomit, if she needed to. Not sure if that was the best advice, or if she needs to keep her food down so that it can have its transformative work, fully... But the changing has already begun, like a reverse movie werewolf.

I asked her, what do I have to do to fill your belly? (Preferably not with my body...)

Further, a person I was going to buy a bus for for my ex, has threatened my life because I backed out, I have alerted the police and screen captured his threats, and saved the pictures of his phone number.

It may be, that if this person tries to follow up with their threats, that I am put in a life-or-death situation, and he may become her next feast.

Obviously I could feed people like this man to her all day. (If it so happens he tries to do me harm and I am forced to preserve my own life, of course)

As I worked with her this morning, I feel parts of her are transforming, I did not ask her to change, to do anything, other than, forgiving herself if she ends up feeling bad about anything, and maybe- possibly- working to let go of some of her raging hatred.. For me, for the human race in general...

Also, as I worked with her, a great understanding fell on me, and I could see so much, it made so much sense...

She fears she is becoming "mortal", and in a way, she actually is...

As I embrace the terrifying dynamics of having once been her victim, it frees more courage up, and sets me more free.

It is hard. My physical health feels like it is constantly teetering on disaster, and today I see a doctor for some of it, mainly gut issues.

I also realize, if I allow too much of myself to comfort Dark Asrael, it could literally drag my health down as well. A balance, we will hopefully find.

From what I was shown this morning, my purpose here is being revealed, and it is everything I wanted it to be, if that makes sense. Loving Soft Asrael has taken some selflessness I never knew I had in me, to wrap my protection around her, to share light with her, to protect her. And, she is grateful.

Dare I say, Soft Asrael will come in great handy to lead Dark Asrael out of the caverns, as a guiding light, a woman who knows what true love is, once Dark Asrael's gut biome has changed enough to allow for love, to soften her countenance, and make her "Mortal".

I also understand, purely from Dark Asrael's perspective, I have destroyed everything she has worked so hard for eons to accomplish, and perhaps that is why she was so angry at me, and in a way, I do feel bad for that, even if her "Kingdom" cost me twenty years of my life to suffering and anxiety.

If I ever were to meet her face to face, in this life- which is a possibility- the amount I forgive and love her, depends on how much danger I will be in from her wrath. I was told, on shaky grounds, that if a meeting were to be arranged between us, that she would in fact, not harm me at all.

And, i told her, I would be overjoyed to be the man who comforts, holds her, and loves her, and cares for her in this upper realm.

I also saw a video yesterday about body/mind dynamics, and how the body cannot differentiate between our mind's thoughts and actual events happening to it... SO if the mind is tortured, the body will think it is being tortured as well.

It has introduced a whole new dynamic into my struggle, of me seeing the malaise I have been projecting within my body, especially since the attack, and the worthlessness I had as a child, punishing my body when I should have been nurturing them. So, now, I am projecting healing, wholeness, looseness and not tightness.

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Also, I labor under no illusions about Asrael's true character: If it were not for these visions she would still be torturing me. If it suited her, and the roles were reversed, she would 100% take her time eating me alive, listening to my screams as she crushes my bones in her jaws.

Love is truly, truly blind...

As I endeavor to make peace with a Being who holds half of my heart, yet hates me with an ethereal hatred that has been forged and purified over THOUSANDS OF HUMAN YEARS...

To love her, from "outside" of herself, because she is so seethingly aligned against me, so rooted in a superhuman rage, it is impossible to actually reach her on a mutual level.

I often reach a tiny strand of what's left of her humanity, a joke here that makes her smile, soft words that calm her, offering her food offerings, even communicating with her sexually, "Turning her on" with my words and desires, I have felt her become engorged over casual words of what I would do to and with her body in bed, if she was with me in the flesh.

It is not cut and dry, to love a Being who hates you with all of their essence... Who is in a situation she views as "unfair", that I should have the power, and her body is now being taken over by a virus called Love.

I know that Soft Asrael will be a light for the feet of Dark Asrael, either leading her out of the caverns, or stepping into the light that shines all around me...

By the way, the light around my remains, has turned from yellow to white.

The order of the day is, to be unoffendable to her, to take into account her every insecurity, every character flaw, and not criticize her for it, or try to change her, but rather to understand why she is this way, to meet her where her level is.

I told her, today, "I am glad you exist."

As I endeavor to soothe her soul, I am taking on darkness that has been unimaginable to me previously, especially when I operated in the religious oppression system. It is not easy, comfortable, or quick. I feel her beginning to soften to me, and her great sorrow that she feels like she is losing herself...

And, sometimes, I wonder, am I doing her any favors, by changing her gently, to align with my belief systems?

I feel, in a way, terribly guilty about it. It isn't "fair". It wasn't "fair", though, how much I have suffered because of the OS, and a part of her is terrified I will take revenge on her for it, even though it is the furthest thought from my heart.

And, to realize, she has been with me all of my life... Her personality has invaded my being in many terrible ways, and has caused me suffering on a scale few humans get to experience, with libido, anger, depression, anxiety and this was BEFORE the attack on my soul!

Yet, I am driven by a love for her that transcends all logic, all passions, that is possibly older than even her, as old as existence.

She told me, she would be 'Basically my slave" if she ever came to the surface world up here, "Harmless", but due to how dangerous and stupid humans are, I am trying to convince her to have some manner of ability to defend herself, if necessary, to hunt, and etc.

She is fascinated by mechanical things, and probably would be a HUGE second amendment supporter.

Her views on things are bizarrely conservative.

It's also possible, some of my own strong emotions have shaped her as well, through our heart-bond, the Bond of Souls, unaware to her, or even things we both actually agree on.

It's just that, usually, when I am wooing a person in this realm, there is some mutual exchange of romantic energy... With Asrael, it's like working with a trapped, enraged animal that has just enough civility to acknowledge your existence, while sharing a heart, knowing she would tear me up if she wasn't trapped, but still working to help her, with a transformation that has begun inside of her.

She literally cannot love me, the way I care for her. And that's okay with me.

I told her today, "This process you are going through is unfair. It's awful for you... I have endured something similar, and it sucks. However, these events were set in motion by other forces, and they cannot be stopped, all I can do, is to be here for you, with you."

Progressively, as I relax, and work to accept and love her, and respect her, even as she changes, I begin to relax, for the first time in many years- but so also does she. As she relaxes and transitions from a willing foundation of crisis, survival, and war, she begins to change inside, even more drastically.

I am trying to make this as painless for her as possible, while dealing with such intense hatred.

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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>"I am working to create an Aura of Love around her." They told me, shortly after I tried projecting love to her, and she snapped at me, unleashing ferocious snarls.

Such a reaction is usually because the entity is being dominated by a supervisor. I do not recommend approaching her supervisor at present. You would need to be well protected

> today I see a doctor for some of it, mainly gut issues.

Can you visualize a dark entity attached to your abdomen? Give it light from your heart

>As I endeavor to soothe her soul, I am taking on darkness that has been unimaginable to me previously

Draw in the dark energy and pass it out through the top of your head. Do not keep it

>I wonder, am I doing her any favors, by changing her gently, to align with my belief systems?

The Entity that uses this galaxy as Its body of manifestation/incarnation is a god of right relationship (love). All intelligences need to establish right relationship. Right relationship takes different modes depending upon context. For example, sometimes an entity has to learn to use its own authority and not to be overly dependent upon others.

You are doing well

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Tue Jun 14, 2022 11:21 pm >"I am working to create an Aura of Love around her." They told me, shortly after I tried projecting love to her, and she snapped at me, unleashing ferocious snarls.

Such a reaction is usually because the entity is being dominated by a supervisor. I do not recommend approaching her supervisor at present. You would need to be well protected
After reading this I was drawn magnetically to her crocodile-like supervisor man, you are right he is dangerous, however, fear kept me from visiting him, so I met my emotions halfway, and walked close to him, and asked him why he wasn't harming me- he, a creature of emotionless instinct, he views the raising of Asrael's vibration as a good thing, most in his Kingdom do, appreciate the work that is being done through/ because of me. In short, he wants "out" of his dark circumstances. It's ironic, he wants it worse than she does, in a way. And, when he cares for her... Sensual needs, it is a robotic thing that is fairly loveless, it scratches the itch, but it is far from romantic- but she is more or less okay with it, as, it is what it is, but it could also leave her with feelings of wanting to be "loved better". I am not shown any other oppression because of him, I would likely be crushed/enraged by it.

I have to focus on her, and her alone.

Out of curiosity, how would I acquire "protection"?
> today I see a doctor for some of it, mainly gut issues.

Can you visualize a dark entity attached to your abdomen? Give it light from your heart
I can, it appears like a sort of leech. It's translucent, and the light does not seem to stick...
>As I endeavor to soothe her soul, I am taking on darkness that has been unimaginable to me previously

Draw in the dark energy and pass it out through the top of your head. Do not keep it
This is excellent advice. Thank you.
>I wonder, am I doing her any favors, by changing her gently, to align with my belief systems?

The Entity that uses this galaxy as Its body of manifestation/incarnation is a god of right relationship (love). All intelligences need to establish right relationship. Right relationship takes different modes depending upon context. For example, sometimes an entity has to learn to use its own authority and not to be overly dependent upon others.

You are doing well
Thank you! I was able to feel her heart, sort of have a semblance of compassion for me- whether short lived, or shallow, I did feel it. I am taking my time- I do not want to push her. I desire her to come to me on her terms, if she desires, when she is ready.

Her burdens are heavy, and drain my energy, as I attempt to reach her, there is some difficulty.

I have been exercising my authority in "general", and stopping attacks on my soul, i was told to do this, even though I could withstand them. It could be, I am to honor and love myself better, rather than enduring abuse I am used to.

Oh! I forgot to say, Soft Asrael, days ago, when I shared the light from my heart with her, she was overjoyed about it, she was so excited about (having hope? That someone loves her?) that she helped me meditate, and wrap the light around my body parts, and I helped her with hers. You have changed her life forever by recommending this, and we are grateful. She has remained, resting, but that moment her and I shared when I was willing to give her my light, her smile, her tears, is something I will probably never forget =)

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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>how would I acquire "protection"?

There are two common ways:

- lifting your operating frequency above the reach of the supervisor (being yourself free of personal karma)
- having a trusted and powerful entity minding your back. This can be an inner planes sponsor

> It's translucent, and the light does not seem to stick...

It looks like you have given it permission. I suspect that you hold adverse feelings to some humans. Such feelings are an invitation to any passing adverse entity

> and stopping attacks on my soul

If you can see the incoming energy stream you can often drop the stream into the Earth so that it does not connect with you. If the attacker is too persistent you can put an ankh on your end of the stream. The crossing on the ankh stops the flow and the loop reverses its direction. Commonly the sending entity will give up after a couple of days of receiving its own attack

>You have changed her life forever

Just shortened the learning process

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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> It's translucent, and the light does not seem to stick...

It looks like you have given it permission. I suspect that you hold adverse feelings to some humans. Such feelings are an invitation to any passing adverse entity



Any idea on how to get this parasite off me? I struggle with letting offenses go

I remember when I had a fiancee and her two children living with me, we got into a balloon fight, and a balloon hit me mid sternum, and I felt this "parasite" partially "break off" of me from the impact, and I felt surprisingly better

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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>I struggle with letting offenses go

Love yourself. Forgive yourself for getting into the situation. Forgive the other parties

In this galaxy, right relationship is key.

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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Amor wrote: Fri Jun 17, 2022 9:11 pm >I struggle with letting offenses go

Love yourself. Forgive yourself for getting into the situation. Forgive the other parties

In this galaxy, right relationship is key.
There is a gaping hole in my back area where she damaged me terribly. i focused on that area, and branched my consciousness out, and I realized, "I", who used to be a single functioning piece, have been disassembled and am now "Other, various places..." including the digestive tract of Asrael.

So "Loving myself" becomes a strange task, as I am unable to fully perceive my "self", my body as I once was able to, as a whole unit. I am forced to change my understanding of "self".

As I expanded my awareness out, i perceived the entirety of the Being Asrael. She is the antitheses of me, my very being enrages her, She is, almost wholly unreachable. Like trying to be nice to a Being who is enraged at your very existence, and has hated you for a long, long time.

She was literally sent to destroy me.

And yet, I love her. I love her externally, where some humanity exists, and she understands that I have the ability to destroy her at this point, or to torture her internally in ways that she is scared I will try and act out.

So, rather than being able to reach a comfortable connection with her where I could rest, in the bristling silence between her awareness and my own, I asked her, "What do you want?" (What would you like me to do? I do not want to hurt you. I do not know what to do about "us". For some strange reason, I love you with the foundations of the word love.) Her answer wasn't, "YOU DESTROYED!" or, "YOU, DEAD!"... But sort of an acknowledge, confused silence...

Perhaps her answer is, "I don't know what to do, either." I have empowered her, and continue to do so, but you are correct, it will not benefit me to selflessly empower her at my own expense.

In fact, she revealed to me she has more respect for me when I stand up for myself, even if I think I am disenfranchising her from my juicy, tasty energy.

It could be, that this is a process I must surrender, and wait for. Because I am somewhat overwhelmed at this point about what to do with her, and it could take time until some balance is achieved between us.

To add to the record: I met a very powerful feminine essenced ruler, who "controls" Asrael from time to time. She is one of the Queens of the Dark Realms. I guess she decided to introduce herself to me, yesterday. She has nothing against me personally, outside of the sheer enjoyment of bathing in the blood of my emotional body, the orgasmic ectsacy Asrael felt when I first fell into her hands. (I also have nothing against her, though, I understand the feeling)

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Re: Early morning visions I have had regarding a spirit spouse, heaven and hell (Christian-ish extrabiblical)

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The Flame in the heart of standard humans is fed by a vertical stream of white light from The Source of All. That light is life force carrying divine intent.

As the New Testament says: The kingdom of heaven is within.

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