I'm sorry to hear you've become ill heliom, i hope you are doing better now.
Personally I think you can feed enough to have more than you need, without really harming anyone. I can't speak for everyone, but I'd rather you were happy and healthy.
I don't really need other peoples' energy anymore, not for a long time now. So I don't know if I still qualify as a psi vamp. kinda a silly term anyway, so it doesn't really matter i guess. I find I still have the common energy body layout, the missing lower chakras, & the need for external energy... I'm just proficient at getting it without feeding on people. actually I think of people as a fairly tiny energy source by comparison, so feeding on people is kinda obsolete. Honestly I was more following the trail of 'power', i wasn't *trying* to obsolete feeding on people. I can't say I regret feeding on people when it was necessary, I never singled people out to cause any noticeable harm. but it is a bit of a relief to not need people as a resource. And when i didn't need them anymore, I did take the time to break the preconscious 'habit' of tapping them for energy.
my experience has been similar to yours, that there is a noticeable density of really proficient energy workers in this occult sub-genre. I've met equally proficient non-vamps, just not as many. I think it boils down to 'practice practice practice' and few occultists really practice every day, while many/most psi vamps do. Of course, bear in mind that when i say that, i'm talking about people who I consider to really be psi vamps, not just people who claim to be for various social or psychological reasons hehe. Sometimes people are surprising though, i remember i knew this one girl for 2 years who claimed to be a psi vamp but never ever outwardly displayed any actual energy working or feeding. and I just kinda assumed she was mistaken about herself, but i didn't bring it up because she was such a nice girl and it's always tacky to try to argue with someone about what they are or aren't. But then one day, she was just crazy hungry for energy and she let loose and it was 'wow' very potent. So I don't like to play judge & jury over who is or isn't actually a psi vamp. But suffice to say, there are those who are and don't know it or want to admit it, there are those who are and know it, and there are those who think it would be cool, and claim to be one. the latter not being very proficient at energy work really. technically i think there are those who legitimately are one 'for a while' (where 'need' is one of the two defining traits, not all causes of chronicly low energy are permanent)
Aliga, its possible its his home he grew up in. if so he might "grow out of it" eventually, as his relationship with his past home life diminishes with time/age. By that i mean the actual causes of his energy deficit might diminish over time, and he might no longer find himself needing others' energy. Then again, that may not be the cause at all
there's so many possible causes, and i think many of them occur, and all psi vamps are definitely not the same. but there is a sort of 'core' grouping I find. generally very proficient energy workers, generally having many personality traits in common. like playful coyness, a strange blend of being both periodically shy/asocial, and periodically charismatic, a great ability for drawing people out of their shell, reliable confidantes, a skill for "successfully" garnering attention (as in, without coming off like an attention seeker). Like the old saying, you know what you call a "pro" attention hog? you call them "fascinating". but counterbalanced with periods of very deep, sometimes prolonged, withdrawing from others, as though they need space to regain their sense of self sometimes. and then there's the energy, the alternating between very high and very low energy states different days. which could seem perhaps like manic depression, except most psi vamps play their inward emotional states kinda close to their chest, and don't outwardly show a lot. crave socializing with others, even though it may make them feel uncomfortable at times. periods of frailty/weakness and seeming larger than life/indomitable. great empathy. great sexual prowess (really, you *want* a lover who's pre-consciously interested in elevating your energy state
). I dunno... I really enjoy their company, there's a subtle 'family' sense i get from it. maybe I'm just silly.
I haven't really hung out in those circles in a long while. I hold a nostalgic fondness for it though.
boy this thread sure is necro'd eh?
not that shields are nearly as sturdy as people think, but still, cool method. tell more 
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