Are there any Daemonolators in this forum ?

[blutnacht]

I suppose I could be considered new to Daemonolatry, though I have been studying it for more or less a year and a half .
I've yet to find a community where I could further my education and grow in my beliefs .

Whichever actual practice I have done was performed in solitude, and I do not even know if I have the right approach .
I currently have hundreds of various grimoires in my digital collection, and have read S. Connolly's Modern Demonolatry, and some of J. Thorp's The Complete Book of Demonolatry Magic .

My elemental counterpart would be Flereous, though I am not Self-Dedicated yet, as I have not officially "chosen" an entity . I don't even know if you need to be Self-Dedicated in order to practice ?

What I am trying to say is that I need someone to help guide me on my Path, but I do not know where to start looking .

[Stukov]

I suppose I could be considered new to Daemonolatry, though I have been studying it for more or less a year and a half .
I've yet to find a community where I could further my education and grow in my beliefs .

Whichever actual practice I have done was performed in solitude, and I do not even know if I have the right approach .
I currently have hundreds of various grimoires in my digital collection, and have read S. Connolly's Modern Demonolatry, and some of J. Thorp's The Complete Book of Demonolatry Magic .

My elemental counterpart would be Flereous, though I am not Self-Dedicated yet, as I have not officially "chosen" an entity . I don't even know if you need to be Self-Dedicated in order to practice ?

What I am trying to say is that I need someone to help guide me on my Path, but I do not know where to start looking .

Well bloodnight, you must define what your path is? What goals do you have? What things do you wish to accomplish and what are your motivations why you want to accomplish them?

[blutnacht]

I suppose I could be considered new to Daemonolatry, though I have been studying it for more or less a year and a half .
I've yet to find a community where I could further my education and grow in my beliefs .

Whichever actual practice I have done was performed in solitude, and I do not even know if I have the right approach .
I currently have hundreds of various grimoires in my digital collection, and have read S. Connolly's Modern Demonolatry, and some of J. Thorp's The Complete Book of Demonolatry Magic .

My elemental counterpart would be Flereous, though I am not Self-Dedicated yet, as I have not officially "chosen" an entity . I don't even know if you need to be Self-Dedicated in order to practice ?

What I am trying to say is that I need someone to help guide me on my Path, but I do not know where to start looking .

Well bloodnight, you must define what your path is? What goals do you have? What things do you wish to accomplish and what are your motivations why you want to accomplish them?

Well, I am certainly at liberty to discuss my path and most of my goals, but my motivations I am afraid are quite personal . Although I can safely generalize them ..

My path is currently unknown, as I have only just begun .
Some goals include but are not limited to, finding my counterpart Demon, performing the dedication ritual, eventually becoming an initiated sect member and growing in that community, establishing a sound personal method of practice, of course keeping an account of all my workings for later reference, and most importantly, understanding the reason for my existence .

As for things I want to accomplish, well, I'd like to reach all of my goals and then some .

Motivating me is the fact that I've been interacting with demons in one way or another since I was a child, consciously or subconsciously, and I 'd like to understand why . There is also a specific event that took place when I was four or five years old, but I will not get into that at this point in time, as this would be getting into my personal motivations .

[Stukov]

Well, I am certainly at liberty to discuss my path and most of my goals, but my motivations I am afraid are quite personal . Although I can safely generalize them ..

You should know that it may be unwise to attempt to keep secrets from those that will be able to access it. If you as a human being are aware of something, such as your motivations, others will be aware of it as well and any illusion of safety for your secret will be used against you. Chess pieces will be placed so you think you are acting in your own hidden desires or forward into your goals, when in reality it is a web of deceit. I certainly don't say this in order to convince you to tell me something, I'm honestly don't care what they are. But I would recommend learning bringing forth everything you think you have hidden and become comfortable with them being open and available. If you want better explanation I can provide upon request (or let someone else chime in who can concur with what I'm hinting at).

My path is currently unknown, as I have only just begun .
Some goals include but are not limited to, finding my counterpart Demon,

You mean your "partner"? Your "companion"?

performing the dedication ritual,

And the purpose of doing this would be? As in, what does such a thing accomplish? I assume you don't want to do it because you want to succeed in doing a ritual, that there is a reason or function for the ritual you wish to fufill?

eventually becoming an initiated sect member and growing in that community,

You may need to be a little more specific as to why you want to be a member in that community? You mean you just want to find the comfort of peers? You desire the admiration of others like you? You want a feel of belonging? etc

establishing a sound personal method of practice, of course keeping an account of all my workings for later reference,

Good documentation is good for whatever it is anyone does, it helps retain knowledge and knowledge is always important no matter the source.

and most importantly, understanding the reason for my existence .

Now you are getting somewhere interesting...more on that in a second.

As for things I want to accomplish, well, I'd like to reach all of my goals and then some .

Motivating me is the fact that I've been interacting with demons in one way or another since I was a child, consciously or subconsciously, and I 'd like to understand why.

Ahh, but you already know why. You tell me the thought has never crossed your mind that you are a "demon"?

There is also a specific event that took place when I was four or five years old, but I will not get into that at this point in time, as this would be getting into my personal motivations .

I could probably look and see what this is, even perhaps give an answer, but I am wise enough to know it isn't my place to. You see, there are things such as these that one must come to for themselves, pieces to a puzzle that along the journey you will pick up and will answer by filling in the pieces. Don't let anyone else "tell" you what that piece means. It's a puzzle you need to complete.

[Belial]

Daemonolators score extra points in my book.I like the path you have chosen , that is so long as you don't decide to work with any of the impotent worthless demons I dislike.Anyway you should define your own reason for your existence.If you want to find the reason for your origin that's different but don't get it mixed up with your reason.

That aside I'm going to file this under interesting and enjoy the show.If I get bored which I most likely will I'll have somebody else enjoy the show for me and summarize the important bits.

[blutnacht]

Well, I am certainly at liberty to discuss my path and most of my goals, but my motivations I am afraid are quite personal . Although I can safely generalize them ..

You should know that it may be unwise to attempt to keep secrets from those that will be able to access it. If you as a human being are aware of something, such as your motivations, others will be aware of it as well and any illusion of safety for your secret will be used against you. Chess pieces will be placed so you think you are acting in your own hidden desires or forward into your goals, when in reality it is a web of deceit. I certainly don't say this in order to convince you to tell me something, I'm honestly don't care what they are. But I would recommend learning bringing forth everything you think you have hidden and become comfortable with them being open and available. If you want better explanation I can provide upon request (or let someone else chime in who can concur with what I'm hinting at).

My path is currently unknown, as I have only just begun .
Some goals include but are not limited to, finding my counterpart Demon,

You mean your "partner"? Your "companion"?

performing the dedication ritual,

And the purpose of doing this would be? As in, what does such a thing accomplish? I assume you don't want to do it because you want to succeed in doing a ritual, that there is a reason or function for the ritual you wish to fufill?

eventually becoming an initiated sect member and growing in that community,

You may need to be a little more specific as to why you want to be a member in that community? You mean you just want to find the comfort of peers? You desire the admiration of others like you? You want a feel of belonging? etc

establishing a sound personal method of practice, of course keeping an account of all my workings for later reference,

Good documentation is good for whatever it is anyone does, it helps retain knowledge and knowledge is always important no matter the source.

and most importantly, understanding the reason for my existence .

Now you are getting somewhere interesting...more on that in a second.

As for things I want to accomplish, well, I'd like to reach all of my goals and then some .

Motivating me is the fact that I've been interacting with demons in one way or another since I was a child, consciously or subconsciously, and I 'd like to understand why.

Ahh, but you already know why. You tell me the thought has never crossed your mind that you are a "demon"?

There is also a specific event that took place when I was four or five years old, but I will not get into that at this point in time, as this would be getting into my personal motivations .

I could probably look and see what this is, even perhaps give an answer, but I am wise enough to know it isn't my place to. You see, there are things such as these that one must come to for themselves, pieces to a puzzle that along the journey you will pick up and will answer by filling in the pieces. Don't let anyone else "tell" you what that piece means. It's a puzzle you need to complete.

My motivations are not "secret," they are not "hidden," but they are perhaps "unconventional" and as such I am not all too certain as to whether or not they should be shared with others . To put it simply, I desire not to be labeled a lunatic . Ha .

Yes, by my counterpart demon I mean my companion, my other half .

As for the dedication ritual, I have read it is a requirement ? Of Daemonolatry that is . Perhaps my mind has been corrupted with some "OFS" notions, but as I see it, once the counterpart demon is found, it is then time for the dedication ritual to that counterpart demon .

My purpose for joining a sect would be the comfort of peers, the feeling of not being alone . A tangible, physical bond to my beliefs, kind of like the comfort churchgoers find in numbers . Though my individual mind could not be influenced into a different state .

I've had the thought, I've even had the belief of being a demon, but I keep telling myself that such a thought is ludicrous, as I am not incorporeal .. I'm in a physical body . Hence, I doubt I could actually be a demon .
I've been reasoning that perhaps I am a vessel of sorts, a "shell" that longs to be filled by demonic entities . But this theory is unreasearched, and so it is only a theory .
To be honest, I have no clue what to make out of my "gift" .

I've dedicated a journal specifically to contain all the pieces of information I find regarding my "puzzle" . It is perhaps the best idea I have ever conceived . xD

[Stukov]

You must learn to accept that others will think things of you, that you don't think are true, or don't think are true. As I told Belial just recently, don't care what others think. Especially those that are unimportant to you.

Well, it is not crazy that "demons" are living as human beings. I think there is plenty of evidence to show that any being, given the right power, ability, and know how can be born a human being. Aliens do it, gods do it, demons, angels, hell...the human experience is one big joy ride these days. There is plenty of stories in history to back this up, plenty of evidence now days to support it. I wasn't human before, I'm here now. It isn't crazy to think you are a "demon". To what extent you are another spirit, that is for you to figure out, but don't reject the idea just become some people made it seem "lunacy".

I know nothing of ritual, well, nothing that I think is important (I don't think ritual is important). You can accomplish just about anything you want without, so I can't guide you to what it is. However, you could be a spirit that loves ritual, certainly possible. However gonna have to wait another response from you before I say more.

[Belial]

You could potentially be the result of a succubus/incubus scenario.I would need to know more about your childhood before pointing a finger at you and calling you a cambion though.However I can understand that you're likely uncomfortable sharing that so I at least thought to put the option on the table.Actually I think I will go ahead and point my finger at you and call you a cambion.

[catboydale]

I've been reasoning that perhaps I am a vessel of sorts, a "shell" that longs to be filled by demonic entities . But this theory is unreasearched, and so it is only a theory .
To be honest, I have no clue what to make out of my "gift" .

I've dedicated a journal specifically to contain all the pieces of information I find regarding my "puzzle" . It is perhaps the best idea I have ever conceived . xD

Perhaps you could go into a little more detail about your gift. You may have had a similar situation as I did. It'd be interesting to know if someone else shares the same gift. I posted my story here: http://www.occultforum.org/forum/viewto ... 16&t=32302
However, I am the other-side of the spectrum when it comes to my beliefs on Satanism and Daemonic Magick.

***

Keeping a Journal is one of the best things you can do. I did the same. Also, keeping a journal is good for you. It allows you to go back to your experiences. I suggest writing as many feelings and vivid descriptions as possible.

[blutnacht]

Actually, I did post an incredibly detailed reply, but for some reason it was taken down ? I told myself it's not worth the bother to retype if it's just gonna keep getting deleted .. >.>

[Belial]

Usually that's just some manner of accident.It's happened to me a few times after some rather massive posts but considering my sheer stubbornness I actually bother to retype it allover again.A word of advice that could save you a lot of grief in the future with long posts is to write it out on some other word or document application then just highlight it and click copy.That way even if your post get's deleted all you have to do is click two times to redo it all.

[Stukov]

Actually, I did post an incredibly detailed reply, but for some reason it was taken down ? I told myself it's not worth the bother to retype if it's just gonna keep getting deleted .. >.>

I doubt it was deleted without any mention. I also assume you didnt go posting "buy stuff at this website!" or link pirate material. It was likely a mistake, I have had some major stuff lost randomly, I always copy/paste into notepad until I see it posted. Anything super intelligent I like to save it as well.

[TheNagual]

I know nothing of ritual, well, nothing that I think is important (I don't think ritual is important). You can accomplish just about anything you want without, so I can't guide you to what it is. However, you could be a spirit that loves ritual, certainly possible. However gonna have to wait another response from you before I say more.

Now you certainly have me intrigued with this bit of info.

I'm certainly not new to all of this, but my approach thus far has been no more than scholarly, although I have read extensively on a variety of disciplines. I am, however, just beginning to seriously explore daemonalotry.

I am aware of the Chaos Magick manifesto, if you will. Perhaps I have misinterpreted some of it, but the gist (to me at least) involves freely borrowing from whatever magickal tradition best suits the current needs of the practitioner. Yet it still seems to imply ritual of some type, albeit a possibly bastardized one.

You do seem to be adept at your craft, whatever the particulars of it may be, as I note that you previously mentioned a chat with Belial. You have also provided the individual who initiated this thread with some seemingly sound advice. So.....I have to ask....how do you approach, and no less make affable contact with, an entity as powerful as Belial, without prescribed ritual? Are you simply a sensitive, or is there some Goetic system in existence that I have yet to discover? I should also state that I am one who regards these entities as being wholly outside of the human psyche. Although I have no hands-on experience with Magick thus far, I have cultivated an above-average level of self-awareness. And by that I mean that, if Asmodeus were living inside my head, I would d@mn well be aware of it.

PLEASE do not interpret this as any sort of mocking or personal attack. Many are wont to perceive me (and especially my literary style) as overtly sarcastic. That is likely because I am and it is. But I assure you I am asking these things in earnest, hat in hand. I really would like as much info as possible on what you have implied. You see, I am attempting to assimilate all of the gnosis I possibly can before actually getting physically involved with any particular tradition (or lack thereof). I can say for certain, however, that my eventual embarkation will be on the LHP. As a result of all of my study, it would appear I have been an adherent to it for most of my life, at least philosophically, and was not even aware of it. Hence my presence in this thread. So......

[Stukov]

I know nothing of ritual, well, nothing that I think is important (I don't think ritual is important). You can accomplish just about anything you want without, so I can't guide you to what it is. However, you could be a spirit that loves ritual, certainly possible. However gonna have to wait another response from you before I say more.

Now you certainly have me intrigued with this bit of info.

I'm certainly not new to all of this, but my approach thus far has been no more than scholarly, although I have read extensively on a variety of disciplines. I am, however, just beginning to seriously explore daemonalotry.

I am aware of the Chaos Magick manifesto, if you will. Perhaps I have misinterpreted some of it, but the gist (to me at least) involves freely borrowing from whatever magickal tradition best suits the current needs of the practitioner. Yet it still seems to imply ritual of some type, albeit a possibly bastardized one.

You do seem to be adept at your craft, whatever the particulars of it may be, as I note that you previously mentioned a chat with Belial. You have also provided the individual who initiated this thread with some seemingly sound advice. So.....I have to ask....how do you approach, and no less make affable contact with, an entity as powerful as Belial, without prescribed ritual? Are you simply a sensitive, or is there some Goetic system in existence that I have yet to discover? I should also state that I am one who regards these entities as being wholly outside of the human psyche. Although I have no hands-on experience with Magick thus far, I have cultivated an above-average level of self-awareness. And by that I mean that, if Asmodeus were living inside my head, I would d@mn well be aware of it.

PLEASE do not interpret this as any sort of mocking or personal attack. Many are wont to perceive me (and especially my literary style) as overtly sarcastic. That is likely because I am and it is. But I assure you I am asking these things in earnest, hat in hand. I really would like as much info as possible on what you have implied. You see, I am attempting to assimilate all of the gnosis I possibly can before actually getting physically involved with any particular tradition (or lack thereof). I can say for certain, however, that my eventual embarkation will be on the LHP. As a result of all of my study, it would appear I have been an adherent to it for most of my life, at least philosophically, and was not even aware of it. Hence my presence in this thread. So......

There are actually quite a few questions here, some answers background information of the more personal nature, however right now I'll just get to basic summation of it. I can get into the rest of it later or do so over PM with you.

Ultimately, any sort of system whether ritual, non-ritual, or whatever it may be came from somewhere and/or someone. It was built just as you build a house. To build a house you first find a sturdy foundation, which requires the knowledge of geology, then you have to find or make some sort of tools, gather whatever resources you need to build a house, set out designing the house based upon the knowledge of construction, physics, and chemistry, then begin to take all these things and start building a house. Of course, if this is the first house you may have built and you may not have a perfect knowledge of geology, construction, physics and so on. So you may run into issues where your foundation isn't as stable as you might think, or sinks in certain areas once weight is on it. You may know that gravity keeps things down, but you don't know how much a load 6"x6"x20' beam can hold, you might end up having a few houses crash down until you get the experience needed to be successful, and of course, you document everything. You may also not know the proper mud/water/straw mixture to make great bricks, may take some time getting right, or the heat needed to bake them - or the length needed to cook them. All things you learn and document. You might even find serious design flaws once you start building - or should something unforeseen say like rain/storms/etc, you may have to redesign your home.

In the end, you are successful and build a house. You have everything documented and should the next time you want to build a house, you have everything you need to replicate it. It doesn't mean there aren't other methods, tools, or ways of building a house - surely there are different kinds of houses - all which some can be built in certain locations with certain techniques, tools, and resources - while others can not. A house that will work on the coast of Vietnam won't work on the plains of the Dakotas. Each needs to be tailor suited for what resources are available, the weather it will encounter, and the differing foundations.

Rituals are a bit like this. They are knowledge and experiences collected and written down so that they can be replicated. They have found that x, y + b gets a result. It doesn't mean different combinations can't get you results, but means someone else got repeated results with what they used. What it can also mean is that they may have a "formula" (ritual) that does seem to work, but it doesn't mean each variable of the ritual is actually something that works, when doing something such as trial and error, unless you are specifically methodical and only test 1 variable at a time, you may end up with null variables that remain in the formula/ritual even though they do nothing. One time you put together x + s + i + m and got your desired result, and since you had success you keep doing the same thing. It doesn't mean that it was simply the combination of x + m that made it work.

Finally, the way in which rituals work predominately is by going through something that "tunes/aligns" you/your energy in a way that allows or facilitates the action you require, while other times its your movement/working with energy that simply gets the attention of certain beings, as certain ones "notice" certain shades of light from a light house, and finally it is all encompassed by your will. All these things can be brought on by using different methods, schools, rituals, teachings, whatever it may be - but your will and energy is still the most important.

When most people start to get into these types of things, I try to give advice (explaining the above, however perhaps not as eloquently here) and recommend that they build their own system. Many types of rituals have side effects some the designers were aware of some they were not and these "backdoors" could end up you being used, hurt, or otherwise have unwanted consequences. Because it is your "will" to complete this ritual and get its results, you basically gave an invitation to anything and everything. It is possible to protect yourself by setting your will to block/prevent certain things, but you are working blindly in this unless you can find a superb catchall to protect yourself, you much think of every possible way you could be used/hurt and set up the protection.

In my book its easier to just not deal with any of it and use your own. Which comes to my final bit. Which is a brief overview of what I do, which is bypass all what I see as unnecessary and work directly with my will and energy. Ive had experiences and abilities that came and went that were both powerful and rather interesting, I had them during a time in which I sought no answers elsewhere. The internet didn't exist in its current form so being in a town of 800-1000 people, nor did I seek out books or other people. I looked inward for any answers that I felt I needed. I looked at every ability and tried to understand it in a way that was like, you see the house built its there, now lets work backwards to unravel how this house was built, what resources was used, why it was used, and basically understand it fundamentally. Whatever it is in the world, if you apply your own inner insight, intelligence, and critical thinking - you can deconstruct anything, whether it be a house, computer, car, even abilities or magic. Once you deconstruct it you have power over it and the power to replicate, rebuild, reuse, or whatever it is you desire to do with it. That is the empowerment I recommend to others, since you wanted to know.

[jthorp]

Demonolator, here.